|Reviews for Monica's diary A historical document|
| Hawki chapter 1 . 3/27
-“But I cannot allow myself to grief for long.”
Should be “grieve.”
-“The Atlamillia has chosen me and it is up to me to go back in time. I hear that there's a new keeper of the red Atlamillia, some boy called Max! I wonder what he's like? Will I get on with him? Will he side with us? (I hope so! Fighting TWO Atlamillia would make our victory almost impossible!) From what I understand, he doesn't know about what his Atlamillia is yet, or even begin to understand it's potential. (Or is it at that point in time? Time travel's weird like that.) Anyway, that's why I have to explain it to him.”
Bringing this up because “Atlamillia” is used four times in the one paragraph. And it REALLY sticks out as a result.
-Anyway, overall, I think this is decently executed. Based heavily on its host setting/story obviously, but it manages to characterize Monica by itself all the same.
| JackDarkStone chapter 1 . 2/5/2011
| SPG inc chapter 1 . 2/3/2011
That's pretty good. Kinda sucks that the Dark Genie blew them up in the end