|Reviews for Murder in Dimsdale|
| MarauderMoony21 chapter 1 . 9/28/2012
You should to make the chapters longer, maybe put one or two chapters together. Details would make this story very vivid like how you describe Mrs. Bucket, it had me picturing a sweet old lady.
Other than that this story sounds like it will be a good mystery. I hope you haven't given up because this has a good voice.
| wallflowerwriter chapter 1 . 5/13/2011
Hey there, this is quite an interesting beginning. But, I do have a couple suggestions. Readers will definitely want more detail. We want to see what everyone looks like. We also want to see what the places look like. Not only will this make your story more realistic, but it will also add some length and pacing.
Oh, and a nitpicky grammar thing. (Sorry, you can ask all my friends. I love grammar too much. .) Always capitalize the first word in dialogue. And italicize people's thoughts. This will make it a whole lot clearer for readers when we're getting an inside peek into Honey's thoughts! Hope you continue this! _
Oh, and I think our fiction tastes are different so it's fine if you'd rather spend your time reading and reviewing stories for fiction you actually enjoy instead of mine.