|Reviews for Already Dead|
| xoxo chapter 1 . 5/24/2014
Haunting, yet oddly beautiful.
| NightmareChild chapter 1 . 12/13/2013
Wow... Just wow. This is incredibly powerful and hauntingly beautiful. The emotions you bring to Ratchet's plight over the twins, his secret hatred of them, the moral crisis he suffers as a physician treating patients who only want to die... The levels of emotion you grant to both Ratchet and Twins are beyond amazing. There are no words for it.
| icanhascamaro chapter 1 . 12/12/2013
| Farky-fark and the Munky Bunch chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
They used to be so happy...:( It was interesting to get the innermost thoughts of good ole Chet. He's a very complex mech. But one loved by almost all. This did well at evoking the proper emotions for such a situation and overly was thoroughly as enjoyable as content allows.
| luinrina chapter 1 . 9/15/2011
I read this one-shot a while ago already, but after having read "Surface of the Sun," I can now much better understand Ratchet's reasoning why he feels about the twins what he feels. The little 'summary' where Ratchet looks back on the twins' past as sparklings and younglings makes much more sense now. With morbid fascination I'm looking forward to the point where his affection turns into negative feelings. I would think it takes a lot for any bot to deserve a spot in the CMO's spark. That Sunny and Sides managed to turn theirs from affection to hatred must mean a really immense change in their characters. However, I believe that there still is some sort of positive feeling inside Ratchet toward them, too. Otherwise he might just leave them to die, despite his programming to repair hurt bots. Certainly, the twins are formidable warriors and thus valuable to the Autobots, but like Ratchet observed, the way they fight gives the impression they actually *want* to be killed. I also believe that Ratchet doesn't necessarily hate the twins but what made them turn out like they did. Like with our kids, a certain percentage of the character is inherited, the other learned. With the bots you can preprogram only so much. The rest lies within the spark and in which environment the sparkling/youngling is raised. Seeing that this one-shot is about Ratchet really, and not Sunny and Sides, I'm not going to repeat what I wrote in my review for chapter 20 of "Surface of the Sun."
Another reviewer noted that not only the twins look already dead, but Ratchet comes close to that point himself. War is always a traumatic experience, for anyone involved, and Ratchet as the CMO who sees the ghastly wounds probably every single orn is especially involved. I sometimes wonder if he doesn't feel like and see himself as a drone from time to time, working on medical protocol rather than being really there with his spark. His question "Why bother?" to no one in particular must appear especially cruel seeing that whatever repair he'd done was to be undone again in the next battle. The more I'm glad Ratchet keeps going - if not for himself and the feeling of doing something good in saving other bots' lives, then at least for the cause, believing that one day the Golden Age can be restored.
I would love if I could read more about Ratchet written by you. Maybe some more stories about his past? *puppy dog eyes*
| Midnight Marquis chapter 1 . 9/11/2011
Poignant and balanced... even though Ratchet's current focus is on Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, it's still inherently RATCHET throughout.
| GrowlingPeanut chapter 1 . 8/5/2011
This is so sad after reading Surface of the Sun. The twins should have just stayed cute and innocent, but everyone goes through drastic changes in some way or another.
And no one knows how hard Ratch has it. All these depressing, philosophical thoughts. No wonder he has a raging temper, he needs some way to express everything he thinks about.
| M.S. Fisher chapter 1 . 7/6/2011
Dark fic. But well done. And it bodes of dark times that "Surface" has been hinting at since they were orn old sparklings. I dread it, yet am morbidly curious as to how those bright sparklings could fall to the point focused here in this story. Ratchet having seen them from sparkling to the autbots they are now, his hopelessness leave me feeling sorry for the twins. For if he lost hope, how could anyone else have any for the two dearsparks?
And yet I will cling to my hope of redemption for my dear Sideswipe and Sunstreaker. It is the only thing I can do.
| Chloo chapter 1 . 2/7/2011
Yeaah, Ratchet gets a oneshot! A really dark, depressing oneshot D:
First, as a general overall thing, I love the entire “Why do I bother?” question, because typically when Ratchet is asking something like that (in other continuities) he’s just being an old grump. Here, he’s got his whole spark invested in the question, because he has reached this level of helplessness and tired acquiescence where he can no longer avoid it. Fixing others is a pivotal part of his entire being, but things clearly aren’t as simple as they used to be. He repairs bots when they’re injured only to have them return time and time again. It’s an endless cycle for sure, ramped up to an even more extreme level of hopelessness and despair when the twins are involved.
But as the physical damage is only part of the issue, I so, SO love the way you go into Ratchet’s distress over never being able to fix a bot completely - and the fact that he has resigned himself to it. That alone must make his life more meaningless (as emo as that sounds), but at least he has his own selfless way to contribute to hopes of a brighter future.
I think the Autobots are lucky to have such a powerful force as the twins on their side, but considering that the twins will disregard their teammates in the heat of battle is so unlike the general Autobot creed, it is really a wonder they’ve joined the Autobots at all. It totally helps that you’ve gradually shed light on much of their reasoning, but it still is a curious thing.
Despite all the stress they put him through, Ratchet still seems to feel a modicum of sympathy and respect for the twins. Maybe I’m wrong there though! I keep flipping back and forth, because Ratchet also seems to feel vastly unappreciated by them and loathes that he can never completely heal them. And he’s right, they’d probably just be content to wallow in their pain without giving Ratchet’s care a second thought... but still! I definitely feel the sympathy as he wonders what kind of terrible misfortune must have occurred to inspire so much anger and hate. Maybe it’s not sympathy, though. Maybe it’s just plain old sadness.
There is an interesting side to Sideswipe that I feel is present here and not in any of the other fics. This could just be my forgetfulness, but I don’t remember him being as much of a monster, for lack of a better word, as Sunstreaker. In fact, Sideswipe often seemed to be the one thing that could bring his brother back from that.
So, my wondering is if Sideswipe has his own personal (separate from Sunstreaker’s) reasons for wanting revenge, or if it’s merely connected through their shared pain of Sunstreaker’s personal loss. Obviously a senseless, mass killing of undeserving bots is reason enough to despise Megatron, but considering they were supposedly allied with him before joining the Autobots, they must have realized that he was capable of such violence. But it seems beyond that. You do outright say that Sunstreaker is the berserker of the pair, but Sideswipe is still so incredibly vicious in his desire for revenge that it feels... unlike him. Again, this could be me forgetting or skipping details, or it could be his character evolving as you get deeper into “Surface of the Sun” and WE lore. Regardless, I’ll be interested to see whichever way his character is going. :)
Um... cheer up, Ratchet...? (We love you!)
| FunkyFish1991 chapter 1 . 2/7/2011
None of the usual Ratchet's, 'why do I bother, oh because I love these guys and that makes it all worth it' stuff here. Your take on this situation is of course deeply gritty, and the ending is so maniacally unhappy - and yet it's still oddly satisfying.
It's great to hear Ratchet's perspective on this war from a certain point of view; it's interesting because I have so much of an inside track on your stories that sometimes I forget which pieces of information I've gotten from you and which come from your actual stories. Perhaps it's in Come that Ratchet tells Wheeljack that he hates the twins now, I can't quite remember, but to get his opinion on them so starkly is a darkly intriguing experience.
Getting this story, at the absolute low point of the twins (and Ratchet's experience with them), is a bit of a shock to the system, having seen them recover somewhat in Time and of course having them pre-scarring in Surface. It's a frightening insight into the pair of them during the war. I particularly like how you portray Sideswipe as being just as dark as his brother, only hiding it better... it's an aspect or idea of him that the fandom at large pretty much ignores, but it's the only plausible character he could have, all things considered - how could his brother be so warped and him remain the ray of sunshine he is often seen to be? Obviously your take on Sunstreaker is among the best in the fandom (probably in the franchise, but being remarkably un-learned in the show and the comics and the old movies and the toys et cetera, I can't state that one for certain... just have my suspicions...), and he's such a tragic character in here. There's something very terrible about the way you describe him as further fallen than his brother, more shredded and torn - physically and otherwise - and then at the end just to insert the little description of the sick joke his unusually bright spark seems to be. Oh, Sunny.
The emphasis is on Ratchet though, and giving us this perspective on the twins offers keen insight into Ratchet's own state of mind. It's committed enough for a medic to keep repairing warriors knowing that they're headed back out onto the battlefield to fight for their cause and get mauled beyond imagination again, but for a medic to keep repairing warriors knowing that in effect all he's doing is sending their dead out to die again is too horrible for most words. You do manage an impressive feat here, because you do find those words. There's something about the ending line that resonates beyond just the twins. The twins may already be dead inside, but it seems as though Ratchet is following close on their heels, reduced to the status of a machine performing its task for a purpose that has become almost an abstract against the reality of their situation.
This was supposed to have been a puny review, and yet your awesomeness appears to have hijacked it. Again. So allow me to offer it to you as a gift for apparently having vanished recently; I'm on a reading week and have much research and designing to do, thus I should be on the computer WAY more than of have been of late. Please do try to get me on MSN if you spot me on dA! Missing you very much, from la FunkyFish )
| Lecidre chapter 1 . 2/6/2011
This is simply amazing beyond words! I know I've already commented on this fic on dA, but I still wanted to write something here because the way you portrayed the characters and the wounds here is incredibly awesome. The battle damages depicted here were so gruesome, but the vivid descriptions also made the scene more realistic and scary.
By the way, I'm just kind of curious about something: Is this a one-shot or only the very first chapter of another new story? I thought it was a one-shot, but I didn't see the 'Complete' tag on FF. Just wondering. XD
| sierpinsky chapter 1 . 2/6/2011
Wow. This is a very different take on the twins. You've made them into dark creatures, instead of the lively pair whose paintjobs matched their dispositions. Nice. ;)
| 1bloodtempest chapter 1 . 2/6/2011
Ratchet bothers because he cares. It doesn't matter how pointless it might seem, how many times he feels so helpless when trying to save the life of a fellow Autobot, it's because he cares about them and wants to keep them alive. Even if Sideswipe and Sunstreaker never really appreciate him for putting them back together as many times as he has, I think that he still fixes them back up because he cares about them. Even if his affection for them dried up all those vorns ago, he can't deny that he still worries about them (and the other Autobots too), no matter how stupid a situation they get themselves into.
I can understand the frustration he feels because they never seem to try and lessen the damage they receive, but they have their reasons to go out into battle and recklessly abandon all manner of common sense in battle. Their losses... they've lost so much since he had met them in Centaurie Tetrax; they do deserve to be able to let themselves go in battle because of their desire for revenge. And yet I feel that they have a limit as to how many life-threatening scenarios they can create just to demolish a group of Decepticons... :(
I've already known that mortals never really appreciate life in its entirety, but... now I realize with startling clarity just how fragile life really is. I find it sad to know that I only realize just how fragile life is not after the death of my paternal grandmother, nor after the death of my maternal grandmother, and not even after the death of my dad's older brother overseas, but only after I read the last two sentences: "It was nights like these, above all others, that made him question why he bothered with the twins. What was the point of the repairs when the truth could be seen so clearly in their optics: they were already dead." Reading that the Twins were already dead by seeing through their optics... I have no idea just how confused I am now. Not about how the Twins could possibly be dead if their sparks are still bright and beating, but how life can so easily be taken for granted and without reservation if the limits of mortality catch up with life all the time? Even if a being can fortify themselves with logic and scientific facts alone, emotions can still snake their way in and bury themselves deep, like a virus. Fear, love, anger, confusion, doubt, and grief - all are parts of life, and yet it's what makes life seem so short because of how fleeting the days really are; how fleeting time is when the days go by filled with emotion and not concentration on how life is so fragile.
I'm not really sure where I'm going with this tangent, but I feel like I need to put my response here on your take on what Ratchet thinks about when he's watching the Twins as they're recovering in his med bay. I think that if I don't, I'll just forget how sharply and clearly I felt the confusion, doubt, and sadness. ;_;
| Bluebird Soaring chapter 1 . 2/6/2011
*shivers* Woah, this one packs an emotional punch right to the gut! But I think Ratchet really knows the answer to his own question - it's his nature and programming to try to save every bot he can, irregardless of their own desire to live. Perhaps its the hope they will see peace and then their will to live will return. Or perhaps he sees into their sparks and knows they can be saved. Or that he wants them to want to live...
I could also take a different view with the twins. Given the backstory you write in SOTS, I could see Sunny wanting the darkness to end. But I see it more as him wanting to feel alive, in spite of himself. The more you feel pain, the more you know you are alive. Even if they aren't living for themselves and really don't seem to care about it, they are trying to feel, trying to find victory. I think there are many layers to what is going on with the twins. But I also know Ratchet will never give up on them!
| femme4jack chapter 1 . 2/6/2011
That was a brilliant and sad read, especially since I'm reading Surface of the Sun right now. I hope that the twins will find some sort of peace ... someday. And Ratchet as well.
No wonder Ratchet is Mr Grumpypants. I would be too :(
Great work. Love it as always.