|Reviews for Fireside|
| The Genius Mage chapter 1 . 5/25/2011
Oh wow I really like this. Fantastic job! It's really deep, I'm always interested in Soul Nomad stuff.
| Me chapter 1 . 4/25/2011
last line /3
| Rayless Night chapter 1 . 3/4/2011
I love this structure - just Danette talking. You did a great job catching her playfulness and angry indignation, and the monologue is pretty natural and believable.
Very interesting setup. I'm not sure who the child's mother is - Shauna's my guess, in some alternate continuity where she escapes - but I like the idea of Virtuous holding onto the onyx blade and not being above dumping it on some other hero in the making. Poor kid. Depending on what being canned up in a sword has done to Revya, he and Danette could practically be the kid's shoulder devil and angel.
Interesting wrinkle at the ending - Danette saying Revya never would have gone bad if Virtuous hadn't manipulated him. It's ironic because the reader knows better - Revya doesn't have to turn evil, there is a choice. Even after all the horror of the Demon Path, Danette's still optimistic and protective - and still has blind spots. It really makes me wonder if her loyalty to Revya is justified.
Nice work. This oneshot stands on its own, but it would also work well in a larger story.
"She hasn't done a good thing for a [single] person"
"graduation to adulthood [was] getting possessed by a walking apocalypse" - great line, by the way
I feel like I wanted things more fleshed out. Like - why is the kid traipsing around with the sword? Who was the mother? How does the kid feel about his/her father? What sort of goals does the kid have? And even little things like what did the kid say that prompted "Don't put words in my mouth" and "That's not what I said"? Granted, it's hard to include lots of details in a structure like this, but the setup feels a bit flimsy without some of this key information.
| Addok chapter 1 . 2/20/2011
Nice! I like how we only get one side of the conversation, leaving the rest up to the reader.
| Iceblocks chapter 1 . 2/11/2011
This is really good, you captured Danette's character perfectly and gave us a little information about the aftermath of Devourlord!Revya'a actions. But who is the mother?
PS. This story is already unique if only because it is the only Soul Nomad fic with a male Revya