|Reviews for Time Cops: The Valentine's Day Affair|
| RonHeartbreaker chapter 1 . 7/1/2011
Terrific story. You don't usually (ever?) write in the first person, and it's a nice change - you've given Jane a very distinctive voice. She sounds a little like Shego - kind of hard-boiled - but not quite as cynical/edgy. And of course the universe holds together nicely (though it gets progressively harder and harder to keep track of who is whose mom/child/cousin/etc.). Some deft writing, btw, about Jane lying to herself - clever. And the final line is an excellent payoff.
| A Markov chapter 1 . 4/2/2011
Nice foray into the first person narrative. I think you did really well with it and it makes me want to pull out "Jack and Jane" from where ever it ended up and start working on it.
| Thomas Linquist chapter 1 . 3/10/2011
Sorry I took so long getting to this story. Life has been a real downer lately. Relationship things.
Which brings us to your tale.
I love Jane's little adventures with time travel. Her relationship with herself would be enough to drive most people crazy. Her ralationship with Junior even more so. Is she taking after her mother in this regard maybe?
I loved how she went to Sheki for fashion advice, and then purchased something different, though still daring enough to drop Kim's jaw and have Shego bent out of shape. She's not Sheki, and she's not Kasy. I don't see so much of her parents there either sometimes. Maybe it's all that interaction with her future self.
| Alexander - Godslayer chapter 1 . 2/15/2011
ACK! Sorry I almost forgot to review this! U
AHEM! It was a nice surprise to see something new from both Best Enemies and Jane as well. The style of this episode was certainly different, although hardly handled perfectly, I think…
It seems that sometimes you, for force of habit, forgot what style you should be writing on. To put one example from the fic:
"No!" the brown-skinned boy yelled, "I don't want to find out."
Shouldn’t it be more like…
"No!" my brown-skinned friend yelled, "I don't want to find out."
…or something like that? Well, at least the cases like that were really few.
Anyway, regarding Jane. It’s actually surprising how casually and… antagonist-like her relationship with her older self is. Makes a worrying parallel to what’s been said about the relationship between Jane and Kasy.
On a more important note, maybe I’m reading too much or getting ahead, but if I’m right, then the story is painfully obviously hinting at Jane and Wade Jr. kind of repeating the relationship between Kim and Ron (and with Francis standing for Josh), perhaps successfully this time around.
Then again, like I said, perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself (or trying to get ahead of the story) considering that Kim didn’t end up with Ron in this universe, and for all that’s known, same thing could happen to Jane.
I dunno, I’d just hate for this to be so predictable. Then again, either way probably is. Just not sure what to expect up to this point. I’ll admit that if I had to pic one of those I’d rather the KiGo-like scenario rather than the best-friends-go-lovers (because it feels ten times more of a cliché), but… this is your stories. Nothing’s mine to decide.
Still, it was an interesting story to read and a curious exploring of Jane’s character. Dunno when to expect more, but I’ll certainly be looking forward to it.
Yours, "Reviewed as Complicated" Alexander/Alexlayer.
| noncynic chapter 1 . 2/15/2011
Nice story, fairly steep learning curve,though. Still puzzled almost all of it out this time. By next year, probably won't be able to manage half. Good read.
| Mr. Wizard chapter 1 . 2/14/2011
Cute little story. Loved the images of the dance and the eventual one-on-exact-same-one punch fest.
| Cell Phone Reader chapter 1 . 2/12/2011
You needed to show more of the fight, this was too thin.
| Invader Johnny chapter 1 . 2/10/2011
Heh heh heh Shego here acted more like a "father" towards his daughter.
Invader Johnny Signing Off.