Reviews for Everybody Falls Down
twistintimeinwonderland chapter 1 . 1/2/2013
It is good but please use paragraphs rather than meshing the entire thing together.
vespertineire chapter 3 . 4/6/2011
It's genuinely getting better! Its really tough to write about Kat, I'm sure. Her wisecracks are so... for lack of a better word, wise, in the movie that its unreal.

I think that some descriptions would help. Have Kat describe how she sees herself, describe how she sees Bianca and Cait, and maybe have her compare and contrast herself with the two.

If you think that's going in the wrong direction maybe you could have her talk to Bianca about her woes with Patrick and Cait.

But seriously, do what you want! And have fun! I love to see that you are improving!

It's good!
IvoryMoonlight chapter 2 . 3/31/2011
ouch, Patrick, that was a nasty blow! Well, I do hope Kat will forgive him but he deserves to get a lesson! Well, I never thought Bianca was Pat's type but so what! It's quite interesting for a fanfic ;) Keep it up and update soon :)
vespertineire chapter 2 . 3/23/2011
What a relief! Separate paragraphs.

This second chapter was better, but it still seems like Bianca to be totally honest. Kat is supposed to be a shrew, so she should be ill-tempered but also quick witted. She's not the type to just blurt out any old word that comes to mind. She has an extensive vocabulary and witty comebacks. Just try to get Kat more into character by using a thesaurus and expanding your own vocabulary as well as hers.
vespertineire chapter 1 . 3/23/2011
Um... sorry to say I'm a little confused.

This doesn't really seem in character for Kat Stratford. It actually sounds more like Bianca.

It doesn't help that its all just one big block either. Separate paragraphs that are shorter are much easier to read.

I get that this is supposed to be like her thoughts, but I think this could be more clear and concise.

I will read the next chapter, and please understand that I want to help you.