Reviews for The Shocking Discovery
Ron's Sweetie chapter 13 . 10/5/2012
Update soon please i love you're story i enjoy reading it.
Jackie Waugh chapter 12 . 7/8/2012
Wow great chapter update soon please?
tanya2byour21 chapter 12 . 7/8/2012
Abby just got pregnant she forgot to take her birth control at least that is what I think lol. I liked the new chapter and I can't wait to find out what is going to happen next. Keep up the great writing and please post more when you can.
Tanya
tanya2byour21 chapter 11 . 7/6/2012
I liked the new chapter and I can't wait to find out what is going to happen next. Keep up the great writing and please post more when you can.
Tanya
DoctorBellaMortLock chapter 10 . 6/24/2012
I'm a little unsure on this story. The format is confusing and it seems rushed but I love the actual story. I think you should slow down and describe things more. Rather than jumping suddenly from one place to another and use the lines in the doc manager section. (You go to doc manager and click edit on the chapter you want then put the cursor where you want the line) Instead of just saying 'With Gibbs and Abby' and such. It just makes things clearer for the reader. I'm sorry for the shear amount of critisizm I'm giving you but I would love your story to be all that it can be.
tanya2byour21 chapter 10 . 6/8/2012
I like this story so far and I can't wait to find out what is going to happen next. Keep up the great writing and please post more when you can.

Tanya
tears on my pillow chapter 4 . 6/2/2012
A siesta is a fucking nap not a damn nun. Get a fucking proofreader! My cousin could write a better story and she's got Downs syndrome!
tears on my pillow chapter 4 . 6/1/2012
A siesta is a fucking nap not a damn nun. Get a fucking proofreader! My cousin could write a better story and she's got Downs syndrome!
bitterhairpuller chapter 1 . 6/1/2012
I have tried to read this, I made it to chapter four and couldn't go any further. I like the idea of the story, but you definitely need a proofreader. I think for Gibbs to act the way you are portraying, he'd have to be on something or be a whole different person. And using Anne Hathaway and Robert Pattinson as your characters shows lack of imagination, be more original, they are actors. I'm sorry but I found it way to boring and confusing to even bother trying to finish reading it. Do you proofread your work at all before you post?
Ron's Sweetie chapter 10 . 5/31/2012
Update soon Please?
fart fart chapter 10 . 5/31/2012
Great update.
fart fart chapter 9 . 9/15/2011
Great update.
Penguinlover chapter 9 . 9/14/2011
It's good but try not to say 'said' a lot. It's kinda of repeatative. Use questioned, asked, smiled, cheerfully etc. Use 'said' once and a while but not after everyone says something. This is not flames or anything I'm just helping you improve. Otherwise great story :)
fart fart chapter 8 . 7/6/2011
Great update.
Talldi chapter 8 . 7/6/2011
Story continues to be with promise. I suggest you slow down and fill out the conversations and interactions. People react and interact. They are not quick bits of information.

You have a great imagination! Keep going!
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