Reviews for Versus
Dinogeek chapter 7 . 3/8/2013
Damnit, why was I drinking water when I read that line about the strippers? O.o Now my knee's wet... XD
Ginger S chapter 12 . 10/21/2012
I could definitely see a sequel on the horizon... :)

Thanks for this story and for coming back to it after such a long time. It is hard sometimes to do what we love when life gets complicated. I'm glad you found the time to give us these last few chapters. I too have some stories to complete and right now...little time to work on them. My mind races with ideas at times when I can't stop and write, but I love it all the same. Good luck on future stories. I look forward to them.
Ginger S chapter 11 . 10/21/2012
Looks like Cassie has taken what she learned to heart and will hopefully shed a positive light to her audience. BONUS! YAY!
Ginger S chapter 10 . 10/21/2012
Finally had a chance to catch up on this story. :)

Loved Gage's thoughts on weakness and needing help sometimes!
Well written...

Off to the next chapter...
Enfleurage chapter 12 . 9/7/2012
I tend not to post reviews on stories in progress unless I am familiar with the author, so I'm coming a little late to the game. Let me start off with an easy and minor nitpicky thing: your Author's note in the first chapter states that this set near the end of Season 1. However, Captain Stanley doesn't take over Station 51 until Season 2. If this is set in the S1 time frame, the Station Captain would have still been Dick Hammer. It's a small nitpick but a risk you take when you are very specific in communicating a targeted timeframe in a story.

You note that you used the episode 'Women' (Season 2) as a reference. I think the story would have been a bit stronger if you'd included elements of 'The Indirect Method' S5. Karen in that episode comes in with a need to prove herself in a man's world, but comes in as a paramedic trainee who has at least credentials and facts, not just opinions, and that is a key thing that is missing in Cassie.

I think you did a good job of characterization on the Station 51 crew, which is actually quite an accomplishment because many authors rely too heavily on older fanfic stories as their 'source' of characterization. It was clear you relied upon the actual episodes and their voices, attitudes and behaviors rang true. I especially liked Gage and Kelly acting like men around Cassie, because yes, that is how most men act. I wish more fanfic writers would show the guys acting like guys. All too often they have them acting like how women think guys should/would act, not how they actually do, and I swear some of them must be giving the guys estrogen injections because in some stories the guys act more like girls than a lot of girls do.

Original characters are the toughest sell in a fandom and Cassie comes in with a lot against her. She's arrogant, opinionated, obnoxious, and just plain wrong most of the time, all of which seemed deliberate on your part to paint the character as an ardent women's libber with her mind made up. And yes, there are women like her, and men with their own causes, equally opinionated. What bothered me about Cassie was that she wasn't nuanced, nor did she do any of the investigative digging and questioning that most reporters use as their primary tools. She came in with her opinions set, and declared that she was going to look for seams to break open the boy's club, which was a great metaphor by the way - I'm only sorry she didn't continue trying to find those seams.

What was missing was that reporters do research before taking on an assignment, during the assignment and after the assignment, to make their stories factually based. Cassie seemed to have no idea of what was actually involved in fire fighting, she didn't ask anyone what was happening, she didn't ask any of the crew to demonstrate the equipment or go through some training drills with the crew to get a feel for what it would actually be like to do the job. I think having her try to carry one of the men would have been a great scene, or having her wear a turnout coat, SCBA gear, and helmet and just stand around at a fire scene would have been an eye opener for her. She would have had a lot more credibility if she had even *asked* to do any of those things.

And honestly, I would have respected her a lot more if she'd been able to handle Gage and Kelly when they acted like men, especially Gage changing in the locker room. It would have been more credible for her to have just gotten up and left the locker room after Johnny rightly pointed out that he'd be changing in front of the other guys because it was the locker room. She was the one who asked to be treated equally, and even if she found that she didn't really like being treated like one of the guys, that she took for granted that men would fetch her coffee or treat her like a lady, I don't think she would have let Johnny (especially Johnny with whom she was fighting the entire time) know that.

I reached adulthood after the feminist pioneers broke through and achieved a lot of gains for women in the workplace, gains which I and many of my generation take for granted, but I think the Betty Friedans and the Gloria Steinhams would have been horrified by the character Cassie representing what they did to fight for equality and equivalent civil liberties for women, and equally horrified that the happy ending in the last chapter had our ardent feminist transformed into a Dear Abby, fixing relationships rather than continuing to advance the cause of women's rights. Learning from the guys in Station 51 that men can be kind and decent, and often are, and that both men and women bring value to the table doesn't make one any less of a feminist, so I was truly surprised at the abrupt change. It seemed almost a betrayal of the abrasive character you created, as if instead of taking the broader knowledge she learned at Station 51, she abandoned who she had been and turned into Phyllis Schlafly.

That being said, you created a truly original character, with flaws, and an interesting story. I think it could be a really good story with a bit of work and I encourage you to keep writing in the fandom. I'll throw in my usual encouragement to take advantage of the Beta Readers in this fandom because they know their series, their characters, have a lot of experience in capturing those characters on paper, and several have EMS and Firefighting background (and no, the Beta Reader encouragement is NOT a plug for me to beta; my hands are pretty full).

Sorry for the overly long review but usually I just ignore stories that I don't like, and try to provide some concrete, genuine concrit to stories and authors that I think have potential.
Former libber chapter 12 . 9/6/2012
Didn't you pretty much trash your take on women's lib by going with the usual happy ending of having Cassie get married? Throughout the whole piece, Cassie came off as extremely opinionated and biased (two things reporters are NOT supposed to be), a parody harpy of what you evidently thought the women's lib movement was back in that era. She lashed out and argued with anything she did not agree with or understand, and like the rest of your "facts" in this piece, you apparently only watched the Christy Todd episode for your research, resulting in a completely unbelieveable story. But the end was what made me decide to speak up, because for 11 chapters you had your character constantly spouting off like some demented Annie Oakley with a press pass about how women can do anything better than men, then chapter 12 comes along and guess what? She's married, writes an advice column for the lovelorn, and gives seminars on how to keep your marriage working, so in theory, all her fussing about women's lib was useless because the inference is that even the most devout of libbers are nothing more than frustrated gals who just need a good marriage to settle them down and take away all those silly notions about women having equal rights. And THAT'S where you committed the greatest injustice in my book because you caved and went with the angle of marrying Cassie off, rather than having her become the next Betty Friedan or Gloria Steinham...you mean to tell me that I burned my bra back in that era and marched for women's rights, all to have some little 20-something of the modern era twist everything that women stood for back then and water all those struggles down to "screw equal rights, women are happiest when they're kept barefoot and pregnant and chained to the kitchen"? Wow, and this generation is supposed to be the most enlightened! I suggest that next time you want to write about something historical (or even if you want to write something, period), that you do that little thing called "research" to make sure what you're presenting as "truthiness" to your readers is in fact, FACT, and not some higgledypiggledy BS you pulled out of the air and threw in here for plot devices.
Guest chapter 9 . 9/6/2012
Um, I've bitten my lip until this chapter but this is almost like a misogynist's take on women's lib.

I really feel as if you're doing women a disservice here. There is nothing wrong with being an ardent women's libber who is convinced that women can do anything that men can do, but as a professional reporter, it's expect that Cassie would have done some basic research on the fire service and come in armed to argue facts and details, not just state and restate her opinion and tell the men they're all idiots.

And her attitude of "If I go in and rescue that man, the guys will notice and I'll be a hero!" makes her come off as incredibly immature, not at all as a professional reporter or a responsible adult would think or act. Even worse, you've made your over-the-top women's libber think and behave as if she is trying to impress the very men who she is insisting are essentially neanderthals.
lynn from pa chapter 12 . 9/6/2012
you have another story line going there
Mistiskies chapter 12 . 9/5/2012
I think you did this story justice as is. now it's time to advance to a new story!.
E51fan chapter 11 . 9/5/2012
One tiny nickpick: Usually if someone has been kept overnight at the hospital, they're required to be released to the care of another person, plus they wouldn't walk out on their own like Cassie did, they'd be wheeled out in a wheelchair per hospital policy. Also, if she has a broken elbow, chances are good she's on some painkillers, so it's doubtful that the hospital would allow her to drive, plus if her arm is in a cast, how can she drive in the first place? Your story overall has been okay, but may I suggest doing a bit more research the next time around, just to make the piece a little more believeable? Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to discourage you, but there was so much that happened in here that we know would not happen in real life, and while I know it's just fanfic and anything goes, it wouldn't be a bad idea to keep as close to reality as you can so it pulls readers better into your story.
jada951 chapter 9 . 7/14/2011
hmmmmmmmmmmm... I'm afraid cassie must be a crispy critter, trapped in the fire so long.

;-)

Would be interested in reading your update.
Pamikae chapter 9 . 5/25/2011
Sorry this is the first time I've reviewed, but I've become to irritated at reading a story and then having it be stopped midstream and never finished. I usually wait til there are at least close to 10 chapters before I'll post a review and even then I've had a few stories go unfinished.

Having said that, I am so enjoying this story! I've known many women like Cassie over the years, some learn some never did. You've woven a very complex story and excelled at showing the point of view from Cassie's side and from Johnny's and Roy's without making to much over it at the same time. I knew exactly where you were getting Dixie's "talk" wtih Cassie from as I remember Dixie having that very discussion with someone on one of the episodes in the first season. She acknowledged her time in the war but still stated that there were things she couldn't have done there or home. I loved how Johnny proved to her that she had a somewhat double standard of womens lib. That was very well done.

The only thing I found a bit off was saying she went to live with her Aunt and Uncle who became to her, her mother and father yet say that she never new a man could behave any other way that that of her biological father. How could she consider her Uncle as her father if he didn't treat her with more love and caring? But other than that tiny detail, I think you've had a very well written and thought out story. Can't wait to see how Cassie comes out of the fire and what lessons she really learns from it if any.

Pam
Sashi4040 chapter 9 . 5/24/2011
Um...no offense, but theoretically Cassie would have been overcome rather quickly by the smoke from the fire and likely would not have been able to attempt to rescue the trapped man, especially if her adrenaline was running and making her heart/breathing rate increase dramatically. I mean, I could be wrong, but I'd think that she'd start taking on smoke the moment she entered the burning building and her physical exertion would have increased her breath intake. And I'd also think that the firefighters would exercise stronger perimeter control so as to prevent someone like her FROM entering a burning building. As big of a fire as you've depicted, there would be several commanders and other personnel keeping watch, ready to alert those on the inside as to what's going on. Watch one of the episodes where they're fighting a large fire, see how they control the scene very carefully and keep non-firefighters out of the perimeter, for safety's sake and for liability purposes. Might want to research out your logistical angles like that, because I honestly don't think any of this chapter would really be possible. Other than that though, the story is interesting overall and while I don't like Cassie's character (she's a stereotypical hardcore feminist and a snot to boot), I do want to see what you have planned for her, so please don't end the story. And congratulations on your graduation and your start of EMT training.

~Sashi4040~
Ginger S chapter 8 . 3/15/2011
I'm glad you shared some insight into why Cassie hates men. I'm also glad that you didn't feel the need to carry it any further for her to be scarred by the actions of the men in her past. Sometimes it just takes a little of some bad behavior to shape a person's beliefs and fears. You did a good job of letting us know where those feelings sprung from without graphic details. The use of inappropriate language is not always necessary to any story, TV show, movie or play. I'm glad you didn't over do it here.

Writing is funny...sometimes it flows unobstructed and sometimes it brews for a while before spilling onto the screen or flowing forth from your pen onto the blank paper you are staring at. Let it come naturally. Slow or fast is not as important as content and believability. Keep it as good as you have been and we (the audience) will be here to receive it when you post.
princessesmeralda chapter 8 . 3/15/2011
I like the story- very different. What in the future will make Cassie change her mind regarding men
33 | Page 1 .. Last Next »