Reviews for Justice is Done
TheWickedTruth89 chapter 1 . 8/16/2013
Interesting idea
SunnyStorms chapter 1 . 7/9/2013
I'm not familiar with Discworld, but this little piece here definitely drew me in, especially with the line: /No one is visible, yet the entire world watches. History is being made./

The first paragraph is striking as a whole. The specific details given - "a chopping block", "a basket", and that it's something that's traditionally done in the morning - set my brain gears running trying to deduce what the undertaking might be and of course I wanted to read on.

Then we have enough word clues to figure out it's an execution and then the neat details in the following line cues us in some more that this isn't an ordinary execution: /There is a second thump as the other man's head lands, both the death knell of the monarchy and the wake up gong for change./

And then at the end, bam - it's revealed to be not just a King but the last King. I loved how you let the details unravel bit by bit. In understating the event, it ended up coming across in a more striking way. I have no knowledge about this fandom, but I found this to be an interesting and well-executed little piece.
ReadingBlueWolf chapter 1 . 7/8/2013
I’m immediately interested because this starts in the morning. I don’t know why but something about that is really intriguing. I really like the description of the first man. He’s tall and thin and holding an axe that seems almost too big for him in a way. I love that it speaks of everyone being too scared to do his job. The contrast he has with the other man is really nice especially when it talks about his rat-like face. The fact the first man killed the second was really intriguing. I loved the way you didn’t come right out and say it. The imagery was really nice.
Tune4Toons chapter 1 . 7/8/2013
I don't know the Discworld series that well, but for something that only describes this one moment, it's super clear where each person stands in the piece (an executioner and a criminal). Definitely someone aware of self-image though, with the mention of how speaking would make it murder. The imagery as well is very vivid, the morning, the two people, the place, how empty the place is. (That line about history has me curious though because this is indeed one quiet [gruesome but fast] moment and yet it carries a lot of meaning to it.) A nice clean piece. :) Thanks for the read! Cheers!

Megalink1126 chapter 1 . 7/7/2013
So, I know absolutely nothing about Discworld or even what it is really, so keep that in mind if I happen to say something that seems incredibly stupid about the fandom, haha. :)

But yes, I did enjoy this. It was very descriptive, and I felt like I could tell what was going on even without knowing the characters pretty easily from the way you wrote it. The length was very nice as well, as it was just the right length to get your point across without it dragging on. It was short, sweet, and to the point.

My favorite aspect of this fic though would probably have to be how powerful some of your lines were. Each one seemed to pack a punch, but there were a few in there that really stood out near the end.

"There is a second thump as the other man's head lands, both the death knell of the monarchy and the wake up gong for change." The symbolism here was just amazing. While the use of the word "thump" twice so close together was sort of weird, you actually managed to pull it off quite nicely by symbolizing both of them. Plus, it really drives home a lot of the meaning that this one-shot is supposed to be about in one short, sweet, simple sentence.

"The first man says nothing. Like his descendant, he believes that would make it murder." I loved this little set of lines a lot, because the characterization it invokes from a few little words is just awesome. It really helped to paint more of a picture of this Vimes guy and breathe life into his character, which isn't something that's easy to do in such a short piece.

The final line was very nice too. It just wrapped the whole piece up very nicely, driving home the message of the piece to the reader one last time. Very nice.

For some concrit, or really nitpicks, I think the phrase "whip like" you used in there would do nicely with a hyphen in between the two words. Also, it seems like you switched tenses at one point through the piece from present to past, as seen in this sentence: "Suffer-not-injustice 'Stoneface' Vimes cleaned the axe blade and walked away into the sunrise."

Overall though, I thought it was very powerful and very well written. I really enjoyed it a lot, and I think you managed to do a great job with it. :)
Edhla chapter 1 . 7/4/2013
Hiya :) As a disclaimer, I have to confess that I read two Discworld novels well over ten years ago, so I'm not sure I can help much with canon or characterisation. That said, I can tell you I really enjoyed this drabble.

"Chopping block and basket." Yeesh. I'm really impressed with how subdued this is - you're not going for drama. The subject matter doesn't need it, frankly.

"History is being made." As a massive fan of history, YES. It's amazing how often 'history' is synonymous with people being executed for whatever reason.

"A reasonably tall, whip like..." I like "whip like", though I think it should probably be written "whip-like." "Reasonably tall" didn't do much for me, though; I can't see "reasonably tall" the way I can see "whip-like."

"Gross and venal." This is excellent.

The execution itself is a real suckerpunch. Again, I love that you don't make it melodramatic- real life doesn't come with background music.

The last paragraph has some great imagery, though the "Suffer-not-injustice" sentence changes to past tense and should perhaps be in present like the rest. A very strong last line, and an awesome drabble :)
RedheadedMarina chapter 1 . 12/30/2012
This is a beautifully structured story. You bring out time, weather, location, austerity, characters, the weight of history and the responsibility of moving forward all in this story. It's a clean, complete story arc and doesn't have one extraneous bit of information, which is an art in itself. I am not familiar with this fandom, but I don't need to be-another mark of your artistry. Very well done.
JeminiaMoon chapter 1 . 12/29/2012
Amazing! It's hard to believe that you can put so much into 299 words...I see talented writing, a compelling story, great descriptions-just to name a few. Your word choice is outstanding-I especially liked "the zenith of its ascent," well done-and another writer might attempt to write the same story, without your word choices and sentence structure, it would only be a fraction of this fic.

The tense change-from present to past, near the end-is very good, the present tense at the beginning makes it well-paced, while the switch to past makes the event seem like a finality-'The job is done, everything's over, that's the end.'

Overall, this was outstanding. Again, it's a lot of substance in a little fic, which you wrote perfectly. Wonderful.

Inkfire chapter 1 . 12/28/2012
Oh, this piece sounded really… special. I don't know Discworld much, so lack of fandom knowledge might have caused part of that feeling, but the atmosphere there just seemed so eerie and mysterious - very dark, yet matter-of-fact dark, cold and clinical. Your descriptions were definitely clinical, they were so precise and I could just picture everything. I liked the way the point of view seemed to be entirely external, and yet we got snippets of insight on the characters' thoughts, what was usual for them and what was not. I really enjoyed the dark treatment of justice, how it was stripped of any noble value, and just happened, harshly, mercilessly. It was a really fascinating and troubling read, you had me hooked!
MessengerOfDreams chapter 1 . 12/27/2012
Sometimes understating a big moment makes it all the more impactful. This seems like the epicenter of a story, the solution to a climax, and yet to the character driven in the story, it seems like nothing. I find that oddly unnerving, but that is in essence what makes this little scene rather marvelous. It's a sort of false ease the story slips us into that we know we should not fall into, yet we do. Your writing is rather marvelous in many ways, the aforementioned and what I've yet to mention, such as your lovely vocabulary, the poetic way you phrase things, your rather excellent description, most notably.

A terrific piece. A well deserved story of the week. Great job!
finallyexploded chapter 1 . 12/26/2012
The descriptions are tasty.

Interesting how the first three paragraphs have present tense and the last paragraph suddenly switches. I'm not sure if that's creative license, or a mistake.

Speaking of mistakes, the grammar is great. I shouldn't complain, but it is "whip-like" figure with the hyphen. No other errors noticed.

As stated earlier, I love the descriptions. It was very creative of you to call him "the axe man", bringing up a personality trait without directly saying it.

To the readers: Knowledge of the fandom is not required to enjoy this tiny fic. If you have 5 free minutes, you should read this.

Member of Eliminator
darkin520 chapter 1 . 12/25/2012
Please know I have no fandom familiarity. However, I really enjoyed this piece. You use some excellent description in this. I really loved the persona of the 'axe man' and how he has to do a job no one else wants. The last lines were extremely blunt, yet powerful. There really is no dancing around what had to be done. I do like that justice won at the end of the day. From not knowing the fandom, I do hope that Ankh-Morpok was a criminal of some sort and he got what he deserved. I hope he wasn't innocent is all. But I did very much enjoy this. I really loved your strong and powerful wording, especially this: "the death knell of the monarchy and the wake up gong for change." That was extremely poetic! Very well done. Thank you for writing. :)
Galvantula866 chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
I take it there was some grand injustice that was done by the hand of this Ankh. He must have been a complete monster if he was subjected to beheading.

Onto the story itself I liked how fleshed out the scene of the execution was. From the light hitting the axe to Vimes thinking but not saying that justice had been done, I was engrossed in this from beginning to messy end. i don't normally like reading about beheadings but seeing as this King Ankh was sort of a jerk I can see why they had to do this.
Rosawyn chapter 1 . 12/24/2012
I am only marginally familiar with Discworld (I've seen a couple of the film adaptions), so I can't comment much on how this relates to Discworld canon. However, I can comment on this as a story, and I liked it! :)

The first sentence does an excellent job of setting the scene. It also does a good job of setting the tone for the piece.

Your descriptions in this are great. I love how you describe the axe as being "very sharp." It's the simplicity here that I think is the strength, because as you say, the axe is designed to do its job. It doesn't have to be fancy.

I do get the feeling that these characters are probably in Discworld canon and that I would know more about them were I more familiar with that. However, I feel you do an excellent job of characterizing them here, especially the "second figure" who I later learned was the last King of Ankh-Morpork (again, I'm sure someone more familiar with Discworld would know that already, but as it is it worked for me).

As a fan of short fics, I very much enjoyed the length of this: not quite 300 words. You've packed so much meaning into those words. You paint such a vivid scene of a sunrise and a bloody death. It's quite amazing and I do believe something that should be recognized. So I am making this fic the Story of the Week for this week at the Reviews Lounge, Too. Hopefully you'll be able to get some more reviews on this amazing little fic.
ShadedRogue chapter 1 . 8/29/2012
I've only read a few of the Discworld novels, so I don't know if this scene actually happens or not, but I like how you decided to take a dark tone on a series that usually doesn't take itself very seriously. Your writing style is very clear and effective, and your descriptions are great. You have a lot of great lines in this piece. I particularly like "No one is visible, yet the entire world watches. History is being made." and "At the zenith of its ascent, it flashes in the early morning light, cutting through the mist which is burning away."
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