|Reviews for Aftermath and Revelations|
| Guest chapter 80 . 6/19
keep going the story
| Sex chapter 2 . 5/3
| dinadan256 chapter 45 . 4/8
I don't get why you force feed entire chapters with both meaningless and nonsensical technical details. You have such a nice grasp on storytelling and general narrative direction, yet you waste your time talking about things you seem to barely grasp.
| Jaili chapter 20 . 12/10/2014
I really enjoy your grasp of the more technical side of the Starcraft universe, although I admit most of your Protoss references from books etc. go over my head because I haven't read them yet. I also like how I'm being kept up with what all the factions are up to, and their antagonists.
I'm not very good at grammar and spelling, so I'm not going to even try picking on that, but there is one error that keeps popping up so I'm gonna point it out: Viel Vile :)
Overall I'm having fun reading this and will of course continue.
| Jaili chapter 5 . 11/29/2014
Hi! Enjoying your story so far- you have taken a very technical approach, showing where everyone stands and what cards are on the table, and I look forward to digging into this more tomorrow.
| greyghost037 chapter 4 . 9/28/2014
a pretty good chapter i enjoyed reading the second part it was good to show more on the Dark voice (Amon) adding Duran was cool cause he disappeared after brood wars not knowing what happened to him, i look forward in seeing more of him in the future
also it was good that you kept the reasons for Warfield joining up with Raynor nice a simple and believable. i'm glad you explained the reason why Raynor never heard of Warfield while he was still with the Sons of Korhal.
you did a very good job on spacing your paragraphs and your spelling and Grammar is really good. i will keep reading looking forward to the next chapter.
| greyghost037 chapter 3 . 8/31/2014
very good chapter i'm glad you devoted this chapter in developing Nova and to show her Human side. i can differently see how she is struggle a bit to get use to being treated differently. i like it how you gave a little explanation about why Raynor picked up Koiter's dog tags, so i thought that was nice little touch there.
you can tell they are growing a bond there and that i also get the sense that Nova maybe interested in Raynor i look forward and seeing how that plays out. but i think he will choose Kerrigan personally myself. i hope at some point that we get to see what happens when Nova get's back her memories and what will be the consequences of it.
| greyghost037 chapter 2 . 8/28/2014
Chapter 2 review
A pretty good chapter, you paragraphed your chapter pretty good making it easy to read. I found it easier to find the place where I am up to pretty easy which can be difficult to do on some stories.
It’s good to see Raynor not fully trusting Valerian as of yet, which you would expect to see after what happened to him and Kerrigan. Just because he helped Save Kerrigan doesn’t mean his suddenly the good guy. I’m glad you explain why he didn’t trust him yet and his rationale for doing so.
Warfield was depicted pretty well I think. I look forward to seeing more of him and how you use him.
Having Nova join the Raiders was pretty out of the blue but at least you explained how she did pretty well. And I look forward to seeing how she handles if and when her memories returns. I think this will be excellent sub plot possibility.
Valerin was as well depicted and I look forward to seeing how his character plays out.
All in all you did a pretty good job in this chapter in making the Reader engage and interested in the blight of the characters so far.
| greyghost037 chapter 1 . 8/26/2014
as promised here is my review for chapter 1
pretty good so far, it's good that you started out with a small chapter first you don't want to overwhelm the reader with a huge wall of text. well that's my impression anyway.
i also love how descriptive of Jim's thoughts and emotions, makes me feel that i'm in his head that i can see what he sees. your doing a good job on capturing this.
would've loved to see the initial characters reactions of seeing Kerrigan's uninfested form and how they feel about it. but i guess it's not really a problem since could read other fan fics depicting this anway. all in all a really good start i'm really enjoying it and i look forward to reading more in the future
| KitanavsMileena chapter 28 . 8/16/2014
So much warfare! I have to go back and reread every few steps to keep up. But geez Kerrigan and Nove are no joke...
| MP36PH3S chapter 23 . 7/18/2014
For some reason Mega Man X1's Cast Roll keeps getting in my head every time I visit this chapter...
| MP36PH3S chapter 80 . 7/17/2014
Any chance we're going to get a "development" or inside moment regarding Kerrigan and Raynor soon? A lot of her appearances in recent chapters have been about her in combat with very little character development. She's continually reflecting on what she's done, yeah, but there's been no furthering of the relationship between them. I understand that's to be expected given that they're separated, but with a lot of the subplots (seemingly) drawing to a close, I'm hoping that will come up soon.
I like that you gave Kerrigan a different, more closed-off persona for combat situations. Makes the character feel more realistic and multi-dimensional (almost anyone has a "game face"), something I sorely missed with HoTS's storytelling. Probably not good for earning the trust of her comrades though...
| MP36PH3S chapter 9 . 7/17/2014
Interesting. The actual Heart of the Swarm campaign shows Kerrigan's fear of retribution for her past deeds from one end (fighting back), and you have it from the other (resignation and acceptance). In fact for the most part this story shows Kerrigan behaving almost the polar opposite of how she did in the actual campaign. That being said though, in HoTS there wasn't anything to keep her from regressing once Raynor "died". I'm really liking your take on Kerrigan's personality and actions; I can't be alone in thinking she would act this way given a different set of circumstances than what happened in Flashpoint...
| Leaf Ranger chapter 80 . 3/6/2014
Ahhh, looks like I'll have to wait to see Mengsk get totally and utterly exposed. Hopefully nothing will happen to stop the transmission from reaching every corner of the Terran Dominion. And so is Colonel Kim now more convinced to working with the Raiders?
And hopefully Kerrigan can find the nuke before it get's detonated. Otherwise she might end up being really toasty. Which wouldn't be a good thing, obviously.
As for that Propaganda guy, wow. I can't believe he actually managed to convince those people. The way he was talking, I would have told him to go back to Mengsk and tell him to shove it, cuz he didn't really say anything to convince them the Emperor was better. Considering how people who needed help were still suffering and he did squat about it, it's clear that before they start clearing out the infested worlds, they need to get rid of him so they can have someone who will help those in need. Those infested planets are already infested, and the people there dead. It'd be better to help the people who need immediate help, and then worry about the infested planets.
Still, I'm really glad you asked me to read this. While I admit, the fighting is kinda bland (I don't really feel any emotions for the people fighting and dying and such) and you've really made me dislike the majority of Protoss, this is still a really awesome and exception fanfic. I look forward to more in the future.
| Leaf Ranger chapter 79 . 3/6/2014
Heh heh heh...HEHE HEHEHEEHEH MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! OH MENGSK, YOU F$%-ED UP BIG TIME! WHOOT!
Oh man, you thought the Korhal broadcast was bad, wait till this get's out. Oh I do so hope it get's out. Heh heh heh. That was just beautiful man. BEAUTIFUL! There is no way Mengsk can cover that up, if it get's out. Way too many people, even those on the Core Worlds and Korhal itself, will turn against him.
Seriously though, that was just awesome. Really awesome. I loved it. And it does make sense, considering what we find out about the planet Shi, you know? When Mengsk used a Zerg drone to try and wipe out the members of the Old Family? It would make total sense for him to try and do something like this with the Psi Emitters.
So now we just have to hop that Colonel Kim will wise up to what her Emperor really is, and we have to hop the Raiders can get the message out in time.
In regards to the other parts of the chapter, well let's see. Bock did get away with the nuke, and that's bad news. I'm really hoping they can get to it in time, and prevent it from being activated, or else Mira and company are going to be in some major trouble. And again, I really hope Bock dies a painful death. Really painful. and slow. That guy got on my nerves from day one.
And Mengsk, you really are a dumb idiot. You can't rule through fear, because fear doesn't last. eventually, people stop fearing you, and then you become screwed because they do rise up against you. fear only works so long as the people have something to lose. But respect, earning the respect and love of your people will last forever. If you can get them to love you for being a benevolent ruler, but respect you as one that is not a push over, they will fight and die for you. And that is why you fail so hard Mengsk.
And you know, Madison should say 'fuck it' after this mission. Hundreds of his men are dead for cans of some stupid gas that his Emperor didn't even properly outfit them to retrieve. He should just throw the Terrazine canisters at Mengsk's feet and says "I'm retired you f$%-ing A$$hole".
OVerall, definitely a really awesome, really great chapter. Loved it. Loved it a lot.