Reviews for Every 30 seconds
Spphynx chapter 4 . 7/6/2011
This is reeeeaaally good. I want to know what happens! xD

Please update soon!
JWilsonJunkie chapter 4 . 5/31/2011
I love it. :D cant wait until next chapter
MajorBachman chapter 4 . 5/23/2011
To me it's a bit of a shame if people stick too close to canon. Most often, small bits from the original are inserted in an attempt to create that authentic feeling to the story, but unfortunately it often works the other way around.

Your plot does not need references to the Goldberg Variations, the memory palace and drawings of Clarice, it's good as it is.

Mentioning Chopin was good.

Your Clarice is getting a bit slow, I would like to see her more active, maybe even pro-active.
misssunshine13 chapter 4 . 5/23/2011
Yayyyy! Keep them rolling! awesome chapter :)
MajorBachman chapter 3 . 4/5/2011
A well done chapter, now you've really got me hooked! Nice plot development.

Maybe Jack was a wee too dumb here for my taste, but no need to worry about that.

Your language was convincing enough here, IMHO.
Clemthepest chapter 3 . 4/3/2011
great job what's going to happen next

i'm french and i really love what you are writting!
misssunshine13 chapter 1 . 4/3/2011
Update soooonnn! Please :)
LittleLecter chapter 3 . 4/2/2011
Very intriguing chapter! Great job. I anxiously await the next update.
girldoctor chapter 3 . 4/2/2011
I really like this story. Can't wait to read the next chapter ;)
B1329-0 chapter 3 . 4/2/2011
Interesting, very interesting.

girldoctor chapter 2 . 4/1/2011
awww what a happy ending :)
TheTruthIsInsideOfYou chapter 2 . 3/25/2011
:) you must keep writing!
Kanan the Immaculate chapter 2 . 3/23/2011
I like the flow of your writing. And I cannot wait to see what surprises await down the road in that month. Will Jack go visit Clarice and discover them?

Happy Writing,

MajorBachman chapter 2 . 3/23/2011
No need to worry there, your lemony chapter was very convincing, made me even doubt if you're really only 15. I hope you won't mind me using the word 'only', but when you're 35, 15 is 'only'. Anyway, well done, but I really wonder what direction this story is going to take!
MajorBachman chapter 1 . 3/23/2011
Quid pro quo - you read and reviewed my fanfic, I read yours - but don't you think now this ends with a polite, politically correct review.

I liked this first chapter. I'll combine the positive and the constructive critisism: a nice plot except for some minor cliché elements, delightful and intense language but some sentences tend to get too complex and unstructured and a nice cliffhanger.

On to chapter two :-)

Major Bachman
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