|Reviews for The Sender and the Reciever|
| zuzuthezombie chapter 1 . 4/16/2012
'Twas good Steampunk, my friend! I likey!
| Anonymous chapter 1 . 1/6/2012
Very nicely done! Not bad steampunk!
| ka has moved chapter 1 . 3/24/2011
Oh, Defender, I love this.
Admittedly I'm incredibly partial to steampunk, but for someone who's new to the genre you did an excellent job. I have to admit, I was a bit unsure of all the gears and clockwork devices you put Mr. Benedict in, but by the time you got to the end it made sense. ;)
The brilliance of steampunk is that there really isn't anything I can correct you on, except to say that the dialogue should be /slightly/ more formal and Rhonda and Number Two would probably be in dresses. The reason I can't correct you on the second count is because this is your interpretation of the genre, therefore what you say goes.
As for CC
"A child's voice filled the room, slow and droning[;]" A colon would be better [here], simply because you're stating that the child is droning and then you type what the child drones.
"She [to] wore boots" An easy-to-make mistake, I've done this one more than I can count. [Too], meaning that she's also wearing boots.
Anyway, I did think that Number Two's armor was pretty clever. Simply saying.
Thanks for your contribution, Defender!