Reviews for Budget Warriors
RougeBaron chapter 8 . 10/25/2011
The scarcity of update is nicely complemented by the high quality. Very good work! I love the "down on their luck" feel of this story. Not everybody starts off with a combined regiment with three Overlord dropships. Somebody has to crawl from the dirt, and you capture the struggle with excellent detail.

I noticed, though, that you associated "Atun" and "like a clockwork" at least three times in this chapter. It'll be nice to use different phrases for each time. But that's minor compared to everything else.
Chargone chapter 8 . 10/16/2011
heh. writing might be hard, but you're hardly bad at it.

this fic is most entertaining.
Nui chapter 8 . 10/14/2011
Nick to see the Budget Warriors again. I love the quirky characters in this - most enjoyable. I know little of the Marion Hegemony so I look forward to seeing what develops.

We your audience are privileged that you choose to share your work, so any time that you can update is a good time for us!
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 7 . 7/17/2011
Between tricky, intese firefights, mercenary bargaining, and technical repair work, Budget Warriors has everything a fun BattleTech story ought to have :) Keep it up!
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 6 . 7/8/2011
Even with the majority of the combatants, the battle here is plenty intense and exciting as the Urbanmech defenders hold off the Locusts and Wasps and other 'mechs. I like the sound of an Urbie using a PPC and a few medium lasers, an effective and ammo-independent way to fight. Heat can be an issue, though. These pilots can really put up with the heat from firing that fast. They must be sweating rivers!

There are a number of run-on sentences in this chapter that make the combat flow a little confusing. See if you can get rid of those in the future.
Nui chapter 7 . 7/5/2011
Oh, I'm still loving this. Keep up the good work. I really like seeing how your characters are coming on and the story developing. I cannot wait to see what comes next!
Nui chapter 6 . 7/1/2011
I have enjoyed this immensely. I really like the characters and the pace of this story! A good cliff-hanger to end on too.
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 5 . 6/25/2011
With a crafty base defense mission and a lot of organizing and repair to do beforehand, the newest chapter is most entertaining. The Budget Warriors had better watch their backs, though, because the enemy force was no doubt pullint its punchss with that first wave of tanks!
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 4 . 4/13/2011
This planet has proved anything but boring, with impressive mining machinery, new vehicles to tinker with, and incoming enemies that will require Atun and friends to earn their pay! Let's see how he can handle the hard part of the job.

I assume that the 60 tons of cargo was spread out across the Urbanmechs? There's no way a 30-ton 'mech can carry sixty tons of anything, after all. :/ No 'mech can exceed its weight limitations, even for cargo on its back. You'd have to remove 5 tons of armor or weapons or ammo in a 'mech to let it carry 5 tons of items on its back, for example. A cargo vehicle would be the simples solution for Atun to use :)
RougeBaron chapter 3 . 4/12/2011
Somebody has a crush on Urbanmechs!

This is a great piece. You have a very thorough grip on the world of Battletech and how everything works. Your writing skill is good too. I'm not a fan of 'special effects' in written essay, but I think the weird accent is weirdly interesting. I'm interested in reading where this one goes.
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 3 . 4/8/2011
So, the Budget Warriors now have their first contract, and negotiate with a lovely but serious officer lady? That makes for fun interaction! Let's see if the Budget Warriors can perform, or if Kemps' doubts are for good reason.
bailomega chapter 2 . 4/8/2011
This is good.

For a first timer, you are unusually good. :)

I like it, keep writing and keep improving.
Nui chapter 3 . 4/6/2011
You don't half like some of the most unloved kit in the inner sphere! I have a bit of a soft spot for the underdogs in most things too. I am really enjoying this story, it is almost enough to make me try my own hand again!
Nui chapter 2 . 4/4/2011
I though that was good, I like the characters - do not worry too much about accents. It is important that they speak differently - you should be able to have a good guess at who is speaking any sentence without being told - something you are managing. I hope that we will see some variation in mechs too - perhaps maligned / unpopular. All in all very good though I have high hopes of this, very enjoyable!
Ulquiorra9000 chapter 2 . 4/2/2011
Witty dialogue and a haevily-accented applicant make the characters pretty funny, and now Atun's merc force is slowy coming together, just a bit at a time. Two Urbanmechs and a Scorpion... he'll need more stuff pretty soon :P

Run-on sentences is when a long sentence has two separate ideas that should be broken up into two sentences.
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