|Reviews for Harry's Game|
| kabs9000 chapter 1 . 7/31/2015
| BretheBabbit chapter 23 . 7/30/2015
Love the story and love love love the whatever you would call it (throwback?) to the author
your constant effort to be less wrong." Hermione said.
| David chapter 23 . 4/5/2015
Wow, really awesome to read. Thanks! :D
| lemon-rind chapter 23 . 3/25/2015
Twisty, and I definitely enjoyed it.
| zdiomidov chapter 20 . 1/14/2015
1. Your Harry isn't level-3 intelligent :(
2. Winklevoss reference was very OOC. I think you should remove it and make Winklevoss another one of Weasleys' pseudonyms.
| Just the Facts 007 chapter 23 . 12/9/2014
Excellent. For the last year or so most of my reading has been the long Harry Potter fanfics. I really enjoyed how you took another fanfic and added your take. Is fiction becoming interactive?
| Folder chapter 15 . 10/17/2014
This guy has some kind of problem with grammar, spelling and the like, but don't underestimate him: He has original ideas and insights; the stuff that turns good but ordinary stories into memorable ones. He also has some understanding of development of scene and character. He is an obvious choice for a literary partner if YOU got abilities that complement and enhance his. Not all greats walk alone. The worlds of Science Fiction and Fantasy are full of great partnerships! Go grab him up and hurry: I can't wait to read your output!
| Folder chapter 8 . 10/16/2014
reading you is like listening to joe cocker: fantastic rhytm, great originality and all the notes actually sung, right on the money. there's those broken vocalcords though and in your case all the missing 'the's. still, i have allways loved joe. and now i love you, heir of youvkowsky!
| Guest chapter 23 . 9/7/2014
Good yarn, and consistent with the original HPMR universe. It's nice to be back in that universe for a new set of plots and adventures. The persistent spelling and punctuation errors are distracting, though.
| The One Who Reads Too Much chapter 23 . 6/4/2014
Ah! Ah! She said it!
HEhehehehehe "Less Wrong"
| s chapter 18 . 6/3/2014
Okay... not bad. Quite clever, in fact. That was smarter than I expected from you.
| s chapter 7 . 6/3/2014
So much of this is not canon. For instance, Harry has no clue what Aragog is in HPMOR (also, they're called Acromantulas; Aragog is the name of one of them and is not plural). Also, Zabini's smarter than you're making him out to be, Harry's even more of a jerk than he is in HPMOR, and... No wonder you're an anti-feminist; you're not good at this whole continuity thing.
| s chapter 2 . 6/3/2014
Hermione raises a valid point. How DO they know it's a 'he'? Harry was being kind of dickish here. The interjection would have taken like 5 seconds to note, for Malfoy to correct himself, and to move on from.
| s chapter 1 . 6/3/2014
Lots of typos, ooc Quirrell, and a number of other things. Interesting premise, though.
| To die upon a kiss chapter 1 . 1/17/2014
Excellent beginning. However, the way you used quotes made things confusing. You should really end them with a comma and use more quote marks. There was a large space of dialogue in the middle that I almost confused for plot, because there weren't any quote marks. Also, there are some places where you need to add commas: "But why are you doing this Professor?" A comma between this and Professor makes the story flow much better. I hope this helped.
Anyway, this is what I liked.
Original premise. Inter-year wars are an exciting idea. Quirrell is definitely in character, except for that Americanism at the beginning, but I still thought that was cool.
I like your analogy: "Like his body language had made a grammatical error." Maybe it could be phrased differently, like "as if his body language had made the equivalent of self-correcting for a grammatical error." I don't know, something like that. But it was a cool comparison, anyway. I like the way you describe behavior, as in "Draco asked, his anger now visible in a simmer." The dialogue from Quirrel is great and spot-on.
I enjoyed the short chapter; I'm glad that you're extrapolating off of HPMOR. This is promising.