Reviews for Breaking The Cycle
N1605 chapter 1 . 9/17/2013
wow quite liked this story
beegurl13 chapter 1 . 4/8/2011
I loved this! :) You did a good job on it, I'm so glad you wrote it! And thanks for liking the banner. I love making those, though I know they aren't always great. :D I liked the one for your story, though. I was so excited when I found those pictures. :D

Love you! Good job!
mmwa chapter 1 . 4/7/2011
Hei honey

Do you know that feeling: you’ve just read a wonderful amazing story that took your breath away and then – here you are (sitting on the lounge of your balcony at 10pm in April…) not having a dam clue how to start your review… I hate that – because it’s not often that you find so unbelievable good stories that you’re having so many thoughts about it you can’t start to process them all.

I’ve said it about your firs published story “A Spark Among The Ashes” too but I think your fabulous work makes this to be repeated: I truly believe you have the talent to bring across not only stories and personalities of various characters in a wonderful way but you’re furthermore able to transport emotions in such a significant manner that it really is inspiring.

However, regarding “Breaking the Cycle” it is not only your writing that was sensational but furthermore the cause of your work. To contribute a piece of art – which I consider such writing to be – to the Fandom Against Domestic Violence FADV is a very selfless thing to do and something I think readers need to encourage. Writing and publishing stories on fanfiction is always a selfless thing to do of course because authors like you spend a lot of free time and commitment to actually create such a story. However, to do so to raise awareness to a very important topic in society is even more impressive. It never is easy to write good stories but to do so about a topic like domestic violence is even harder because there is a small line between reality and fiction and there are many opinions and different experiences and various ranges of knowledge – to combine all of these to a wonderful working story is not only a huge challenge but also your achievement!

What I think is really impressive is the way you’re able to put so much into a one-shot without leaving the reader with a feeling of having missed something. You have the talent to tell stories and very few words and bring characters and their emotions across in a heartbeat. Event though it is a dark story to read it’s also very refreshing because the use of language really is inspiring.

A wonderful way to illustrate my words is the way you’ve decided to start this story. To have a grown up Bella thinking back at the time “it all started” and having her relive her childhood was very intense and also very “helpful” to guide the reader into this story. You were able to illustrate these first scenes so wonderfully that I was able to “see” little Bella standing at the top of the stairs and see her parents fighting; I could feel her anxiety, her defencelessness – her questions and her fear.

I was glad Bella had Herman with her… I know that may sound funny now but these small things can give children the love and support they can’t get form other places. To take something like a cuddling toy into a story like this shows how real you were trying to write this one-shot, how close you keep it to real life and are not afraid to spend time on details like Herman.

I think having Bella wonder and trying to explain why she did go to the stairs even though she was afraid and knew she shouldn’t go was typical for children in situations like this. It’s also normal for an adult like Bella when thinking back at these moments to look for the reason in herself – as it could have been her fault or these things wouldn’t have happened if she didn’t go to the stairs. Of course we (and Bella) know that logically this is not the case and what has happened wasn’t her fault in the first place either but the urge to find answers to questions where just no answers can be found only leave us with questioning ourselves.

The scene where you described her seeing her mother on the floor with Phil hovering above her was very strong. I was actually able to feel the pain the moment Phil’s boots collided with Bella’s mother ribs. It was a stunning scene and very well written. However it’s not only the physical pain you were able to bring across very well but even more though Bella’s personal struggle, her inability to act or run. It was a wonderful scene – even though it was a very dark one it was absolutely brilliant because the writing worked perfectly.

A nice detail – and a small glimpse of hope was the fact that Phil didn’t punch little Bella after she came downstairs – punishing her for listening or getting out of bed – seeing something she wasn’t supposed to. In situations like these men (or women) can react very irrational and wanting to punish other people for their own actions. Having a child doing something it wasn’t supposed too – like getting up at night – is often used as an excuse to get the adrenaline out of its system. I was glad Phil didn’t do that – as much as I hate him to start with for what he did to Renée and Bella, the fact that he didn’t punish his daughter in this scene gave me hope.

The life that followed was wonderfully illustrated and showed how very well you’re able to connect reality with fiction. I though having her suffering through school because of what had happened to her mother (and her) when she was a small child was very realistic. Being in such a situation doesn’t give you the power to being able to fight back – you learn to accept such behaviours. Exactly that’s the reason why I think it’s so important to raise awareness for this topic because we need to see that it is happening, all around us, every day – but we can fight back, we have to fight back.

I wasn’t surprised to see Bella starting to grow closer with her best friend – between her and Edward there was closeness even before they started to have a sexual relationship. I think it was that fact that let her go, let her feel him and starting to allow herself to connect herself again (after her mother, when she was little) to another person. I think their story was a very “typical” one (for lack of a better word). They enjoyed their new found closeness, the emotions and all the new found freedom in each other. To forget the pill, or missing a day or two is so common and I though very well included into this story.

To have Bella starting to face her past through her future was absolutely wonderful and I think very realistic because for people in such situations it’s often only these life changing experiences that help you facing up your past and fears. I was very proud of Bella and Edward in this scene to being able to talk with each other not only about Bella’s past but also about the emotions involved. I think you brought these intense months across very well.

Furthermore I was glad to see Bella being strong enough to take that beat and confronting her childhood. I mean she could have walked away, she could have left Edward with Tom and running from her story – she wouldn’t have been the first to do exactly that. I was absolutely proud of her for fighting back, for confronting her emotions and speaking them out loud. Her insight on a child’s mind in such an intense situations was very well written and stunning to read. I think Bella’s right when she says that children don’t have to be all grown up to see what’s happening – it doesn’t mean they can understand it all (or process words) however, the emotions involved are something children will never forget – because they maybe little, the maybe not able to understand all that has been said but they see – they always see.

To finish up I want to mention Renée too. I keep this character till the end because I think this is something that it’s hard to understand. Being beaten by your husband, having a child suffering through that and still not wanting to press charges or at least get rid of this man is something that’s nearly impossible to understand for outsiders. However, as Bella accepted the violence against her in school, her mother was used to Phil. He wasn’t all bad (as horrible that may sound now), they had their good times too and maybe she did something wrong… It’s exactly that kind of thinking that possess the problem in these situations because you’re not able to “break this cycle”. It would be simple to just “hate” Renée for what has happened to Bella in her childhood but I think it’s too easy. People like Renée are as much victims as they are offenders for not being able to protect their children. Of course she should have made sure that Bella was safe, of course she should have fought back earlier but could she? Was she able to do that and if not – why not? As much as I believe parents always need to be able to protect their children, I also think there are situations where you can’t answer questions with yes or no. However, as long as it is not “normal” to talk about such things in public, with family and friends victims won’t talk, won’t fight – we need to rise awareness, to make people feel comfortable enough to talk out loud – only together we can stop domestic violence because it’s something that concerns us all.

Thank you for giving us the changes to do that!

Love

Debbie

Ps.: I want to end my review with the remark that there is the wonderful award waiting for your nominations! The Sunflowers Awards are up and ready for your wonderful stories. Make sure to check out the nomination page first to see if your favourite stories have already been put up. There are many wonderful categories – like your favourite Bella, or Edward, Carlisle, Esme or the most thrilling angst story, best drama, best cliffy and so on. There are also nominations for betas, who deserve some love too. It’s important to note that this Award is for wonderful stories and authors with less than 1’000 reviews because there are many fabulous jewels on here that deserve your love and support. So go check it out and make sure your favourite author, story, character or beta gets the acknowledgment they deserve: - you can be sure that this one-shot will be found there soon enough as well! :D