Reviews for The Long Road Back
charahkids chapter 14 . 11/23/2013
So sorry about Nik, Bill. Very nice of you to dedicate this chapter to her.

RIP Nik.
Chuckfanster chapter 57 . 11/6/2013
Thank you for your epic "final" story although I wish you would have shortened some of the C&S drama regarding them misunderstanding what the other is saying or their insecurities popping up frequently (it got old after awhile) and extended the story until Sarah's and Ellie's babies are born.
You are a very talented writer and thank you for letting us know when something may be disturbing. I skipped the Ellie getting beat up part. Also, I like the way you ended Shaw, although I wish it would have happened sooner.
Crittab chapter 29 . 11/6/2012
I have to say, I'm having a really hard time decided whether or not to finish reading this fic. On the one hand, you're clearly a very talented writer, and the plot is incredibly compelling. You deal with each situation very well, and give stories a chance to play themselves out fully without spending too much time in any one area. If that's all great writing was about, you'd be one of the best, and this fic would be one of the best (and I have to say, the fic that preceded this, The Long Brick Road, was excellent).

That said, the characters, all of them, are so painfully OOC in this fic that it makes me want to pull my hair out. Sarah, by nature, is a woman of few words. She loves Chuck passionately, but not by falling all over herself to explain, and then re-explain, and then re-re-explain her feelings every time an issue comes up. She's also not a pimp (nor are any of the other team members), and that she's now helped plan and coerced her friends (and herself) to do seduction over other forms of persuasion several times in this fic is really frustrating. That's not the way Sarah deals with people she needs to get through (see Phase 3 for more).

Another character that's just painful to read is Ellie. First, and this is more of a problem with the last fic than this one, Ellie would never, ever, EVER cheat on Devon. Not in a million years. It's so far beyond the realm of plausibility for her character that I actually skipped over reading that scene with Cole because it was completely wrong for who she is. She also hasn't shown any jealousy toward anyone in the run of the show, so I find her blatant hatred for Misty a little much (and I know Misty is your original character, but her way of dealing with people could use some fine tuning).

Finally - Chuck. Chuck is not a yes-man, and he never has been. He doesn't stay in the car, he doesn't jump when Sarah tells him to, and he wouldn't run with her while the rest of his family was in such grave danger. Chuck is selfless, and as such, puts himself in any number of insanely dangerous situations to protect the people he loves. He would never have asked to have the Intersect 2.0 taken out because one mission went badly, or because someone was killed by the enemy; that would only strengthen his resolve.

I almost feel like this story isn't about Chuck, but rather about Sarah and Ellie, who seem to be the only two characters with a personality (even though those personalities are wildly different from their counterparts on the show). Chuck is a reaction, as is Devon, to events set in motion around them, and they don't seem to take much control over anything in their own lives. They both just accept what they're given, which is frustrating.

I'm not trying to hate on your fic, because like I said, it's incredibly well written, not a grammar error in sight, and your ability to tell a long and complicated story is enviable. My problem is strictly character-based. I feel like these characters are not quite as malleable as you would like them to be, and you've ignored some very basic personality traits in order to create this dramatic journey that you want to take place.

Anyway... that said, I'll consider finishing reading the fic because it is a good 'story' - but I might have to pretend like this isn't actually a Chuck fic, because these characters have nothing to do with the ones on the show.
s-david-m chapter 23 . 10/24/2012
Sarah's lecture to Chuck seems inappropriate. The whole reason Chuck hates killing is because he believes people are basically good and following misguided orders and/or principles. Spies and soldiers are generally the ones that need this lecture for exactly the reason Sarah says: dehumanizing the enemy helps them deal with having to kill. And sure Chuck cracks jokes, but that was always a defense mechanism to deal with stress. Yelling at him just makes stress worse, so that's not helping at all.

The rest of the chapter is good.
s-david-m chapter 16 . 10/23/2012
Ah, I thought Bryce might be part of Orion's test. Well played. I do still think your emotional Sarah is off though. Sarah's more the angry type than the crying type. In fact, I think you can count on one hand the number of times she cried on the show.
s-david-m chapter 15 . 10/23/2012
You have a good plot, and the Bryce subplot could have been a good arc too, if you didn't have the whole star-crossed lovers theme between Chuck and Sarah. I have to admit I'm not a fan of that approach. Real feelings like love are messy and confusing, and there's always some doubt. I think that's the only weak part of this story so far, although I think the Bryce betrayal seems unlikely given Canon. Bryce always did his duty and never wavered, and he was a friend to Chuck, even if he did hurt him sometimes.
s-david-m chapter 8 . 10/23/2012
Good sequel so far. Sarah seems pretty open and articulate though, and willing to make herself pretty vulnerable. More than you'd expect from a hardcore spy who's dealt with deceit all her life, where emotions are weakness. I think her emotional growth was just a little too quick. Her calling Orion dad was a part of that too, and I know you tried to address that by saying she was riding the emotional edge, but if anything that would make her shutdown, not open up.

Well written story so far though, and I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with it.
Guest chapter 57 . 7/2/2012
Well done! I have spent the last 3 weeks reading everything you have done. I was drawn to your stories since I felt they stayed true to the characters. I truly miss the show , but believe if some of these story lines were incorporated into Chuck episodes...we may not be talking about the cancellation of the series. It is nice to see a Chuck fan about the same age as myself. Chuck, Sarah and their adventures are a plea sent way to escape the daily grind of earning a living. I will keep reading them...if you keep writing them. Thank
You for your effort and investment you put into these characters so I could keep my Chuck & Sarah fix well fed and alive
lancemanion chapter 57 . 4/28/2012
Hey, i just finished reading this story ...and wanted to thank you for the therapy. I very much agree with your author's note. The action, silly storylines, etc. were only the vehicle to deliver the Chuck and Sarah relationship saga. That's why I watched. Your stories capture the relationship I picture for them nicely. Good job, and thanks.
Musicalmania chapter 57 . 4/15/2012
Long, but great story. Long Live Chuck in our hearts and our memories!
Ash2134 chapter 57 . 4/1/2012
Wow. I only just got to reading this story and it was absolutely amazing! I'm going to go and read all your other stories as this was just so good I read it and the prequel within 4 days! I see you have an extended series from earlier on, I usually avoid reading fanfics from early on in the chuck universe but this was simply so good that I really want to read the rest that you have wrote!
spcr71 chapter 57 . 3/1/2012
Well I finally finished your great sequel. It was really well thought out and I love how you brought it all together in the end. In addition you really did give everyone a ferry book ending. On top of that you continued the story a bit and didn't just end it, a HUGE plus in my book. The original story will always be one of my favorites and by association this one. It really is monumentally better then what we were given.

I think I'm in the same boat with you as far as my reasons for watching the show. If I was interested in much more then the C&S part I would have given it up a long long time ago. There were to many plot holes to make the rest of the parts interesting. As it is they screwed up C&S a lot for a long time only to screw them up again in the ending. I'm kind of disapointed in myself for not expecting that.

Thanks you for all of the fanfic that you've written. It has provided hours upon hours of enjoyment. I was rather sad to read that you are planning on moving on. The show is done but that doesn't mean the stories have to end. Fanfic has been more of a draw to me then the show has been for a while. I really hope you get together with BrickRoad and write the The Long Road Home. If not thanks again for everything.
CharlesCarmichael728 chapter 57 . 2/25/2012
Hey i really really liked the story line and would very much so like for you to write the third one
Specks chapter 17 . 2/19/2012
On chapter 17 and calling it a night, but I wanted to say that it is pretty darn awesome so far. I also like that Bryce isn't made out to be a villain. It doesn't balance out well against what the show portrays him as. Cole too. Shaw, on the other hand... makes an excellent villain. Looking forward to reading more tomorrow.
doc2or chapter 57 . 2/7/2012
Wow Bill, what can I say except thank you for letting me be part of this amazing story/journey about a group of incredibly special characters, two in particular. I am still very disappointed with the finale and am glad to see a very uplifting, satisfying and positive ending.

There is definitely a big emptiness in me the past 10 days and I am asking/imploring you to help me fill it by collaborating with Brick and giving us a better ending and closure to Chuck and Sarah's story.

Thanks again for all your hard work and for the enjoyment of this and other stories.
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