|Reviews for exhaust|
| morevna chapter 1 . 5/2/2011
You two are making it a whole story? I expressed in my review that I hoped whoever wrote this would make a sequel, or whatever, give it more of a background, because I absolutely loved it, even though I shed tears and definitely used up my only tissue box available. :) An estimate, perhaps, how long we'll be waiting? Update it sooooon!
| Burntcore chapter 1 . 5/2/2011
This is just as powerful now as it was when it was posted in teh contest... and you are going to extend it to a multi-chap? wow I am intrigued.
| LiRock chapter 1 . 5/2/2011
I really hate stories that don't end in a HEA. That said, this was extremely moving and well written. I wanted to yell at my computer, to tell Edward to be honest with Bella.
I wasn't going to review but after reading some of the others I felt they were unjustified. Yes Edward was being selfish, but he was hurting too and just wanted to feel better for a bit. Perfectly human. How can any of us judge him without walking in his shoes? And some thought that he would now move on to Rosalie when you clearly stated that she and Emmett were together again. She knew there was nothing between herself and Edward except comfort. Edward is the loser here. He is left with nothing except his son and the knowledge that this is what drove Bella to suicide.
Very good story. Thanks
| Lovelybrutal chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Wow. i can't. just.
i can see why this won. So well crafted, thoughtful, real. It's scary how believable it is, how real it *could* be. And so, so sad. My gosh, how could you stand to write it? How could you even start, knowing how it was going to end up?
Beautiful, intense, heartrending.
i want to say how much i enjoyed it, but people snotsobbbing usually aren't 'enjoying' themselves. So i'll just tell you, damn, ladies, that was good. Bravo.
Thanks for writing and sharing.
| grabadietcoke chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
I'm not sure that there are words for just how good this story is. I seriously thought about it for hours after - all of it. The turns and twists and the angst. Miscommunications and avoidance - you guys wrote him so consistantly. Anything that might cause conflict he ducked, with Bella, then with Rosalie and then with Bella again. I could totally understand where Bella's mind was at and how different a place she was. Not that I condone suicide, but given her circumstances, it was easy to see why she chose that. Wow, seriously amazing.
| slrstars chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Oh you two, geez you really know how to get me everytime. When I found out you were collaborating for an unhappily ever after story I knew it would be good. This was so sad I had to stop half way through and that ending...phew. It was so good no wonder you won. I look forward to reading another collaboration maybe one where the ending is slightly happier ;) Congratulations ladies! D
| keyecullen chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Well no wonder you guys won first place! You simply deserved it! What a story! And what a mess. All of which could have been solved with some communication. Well, you know what I mean.
So, did I miss something? Did Alice die in the car wreck along with the children?
And I am curious, what happened next?
| gracielaw chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
This was...difficult. Actually it was really, really hard. It hurt my heart and made me uncomfortable long after I had finished reading it. By all that I mean that I loved it and thought you guys went beyond knocking it out of the park! I always know I can come to you bee for some delicious angsty angst. Nobody rips my heart out quite like you. Thank you for writing and not shying away from the hard stuff. Life isn't always pretty.
| bugsmama07 chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
wow girl. just absolutely wow. i am just speechless. congrats on the win in the contest. it was fabulous!
| Unchanged Affections chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Congrats to you both! So excited )
| Bunch2009 chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
That was so heartbreakingly beautiful.
| Mary Alice 7 chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Even though its so tragic, its also so beautifully written! I just knew she would do something drastic. It moved me to tears. Ya'll did an awesome job!
| OK chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
I don't see how this is unhappy. Edward got what he wanted. He mentioned how it was too bad he didn't love Rosalie, if he did, he would have told Bella to screw herself and divorced her. He obviously had no problem replacing his wife when she was alive. Now that she is dead, he can have Rosalie and Jacob without Bella getting in the way. He seems too incredibly selfish to truly love someone. First, he tells Bella to leave because he can't take her depression. Second, he replaces her with another waitress. Third, even when she starts to get better he doesn't end things with Rosalie. Fourth, he selfishly decides not to tell her about Jacob because he knows she will leave him. It was all about his pain and he never truly felt any remorse. He continued his friendship with Rosalie thinking that the four of them could be a family. I understand seeing his son, but being all BFF with that whore?
Also, Rosalie is a selfish bitch. All she wanted was Edward for herself. She just saw someone dead and all she can think about is how it is going to affect her. Edward and Rosalie are so selfish that Rosalie is right, they were made for each other. They were the ones who truly deserved to suffer. It seems that Bella was punished for her depression.
I'd like to think that Edward told Rosalie and Jocob to screw themselves and left to become a hermit. But knowing what a selfish person he is who never felt remorse over cheating, he probably ends up marrying Rosalie and living his little suburban life with them feeling no guilt. If he truly loved her, he would have let her go so she could find another man who will love her. So, I don't see how this is an unhappily ever after. The crazy depressed bitch died and Edward can have his replacement.
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
Wow! That was amazingly painful. Almost as amazing as Edward thinking Bella would accept his son and find this a blessing...seriously Edward?
Good job ladies!
| loopylou992 chapter 1 . 5/1/2011
I read and voted for this in the comp and this still hits as hard as it did when I read it then. I have tears in my eyes! This is a truly heart wrenching story and looses none of its impact on a second reading, I honestly cannot tell what was missing from the competition entry it just flows beautifully as it did first time round.
I have you on author alert anyway and will now be heading over to Mrs Robward profile too and checking out her stories and yay I have found a new author to follow! Look forward to the joint collaboration will now have you both on author alert.
CONGRATS on winning, out of all the stories on the comp there were only 2 that I loved and voted for - well done to you both x x x