|Reviews for rosario brother|
| Anub'Arak chapter 3 . 6/11
cant wait to see more of this story
| tm chapter 3 . 7/10/2013
please make more of these they are awsome
| yuseff jones chapter 3 . 6/15/2013
finish the f%*'n story
| deathbringer chapter 3 . 2/9/2013
| silentsrises chapter 3 . 2/9/2013
noooo not a cliff hanger this is epic please update soon
| Horace Pinker chapter 2 . 2/8/2013
What Exasperation said, but with a few more off colored remarks regarding your Mary Sue added in...
| Exasperation chapter 2 . 1/28/2013
I'm sorry, but this story is simply horrid. It was published in 2011 and went without any updates for almost two years. Yet, when you finally update it, the quality of it is no better now than it was back then. Is there really a need for Trent to have more than two names? I mean, seriously, is he that special of a character? Is he also so special that he can whoop Kuyou, Hokuto, Gyokuro, Touhou Fuhai, Kahlua, and Issa Shuzen with one hand tied behind his back? You've been writing fanfics since 2011. One would think that by now, you'd know that Mary Sue stories such as this will get chewed up and spit out by most reviewers. The paragraphs are also far too long in addition to the poor grammar.
In conclusion, the main character is a flat uninteresting Mary Sue and the spacing and the grammar for this fic is just horrendous. I also can't get over how he needs to have three names. The fact that he has three aliases(Trent, Torento, and Matthaios) just screams "Look at me! I'm so special!" I hate to say it, but this story has basically no redeeming values. Everything about this is atrocious beyond belief. Even the other OC/Self-insert fics out there at least try to have some semblance of a plot with passable grammar. But I see none of that here.
Everything I've said is my opinion of this story. Try not to take it personally. I think everyone has the potential to improve. But you're going to have to put in some serious work in order to create a series that hooks in more readers who will enjoy the story. To begin with, start with improving your grammar and your spacing. Once that's settled, I would recommend coming up with a story that doesn't rely upon the usual "OC comes to Youkai Academy and all the canon characters center all their attention on him/her" plot that's been done to death.
That is all. Good luck to you.
| deathbringer chapter 2 . 1/28/2013
| deathbringer chapter 1 . 4/10/2012
when are going to put a new chapter damm it
| deathbringer chapter 1 . 3/26/2012
please write more i really want to know what happens i have a idea next chapter his brother trent comes after a week tsukune and trent powers awaken and try and kill each other.
| InMyOwnMind chapter 1 . 5/3/2011
Okay, you went from aliens, to striping Tsukune of his humanity for the sake of making him fit with this Trent OC you're trying to push. I'm sorry but the only thing I'm getting from this is how much you make this about this Trent. Have you read "Here in my Arms" by Platinumsabr? It has the best use of Original characters I've seen for a work like rosariovampire
| Catyz101 chapter 1 . 5/3/2011
I like the idea of the story and how your playing it out, please do continue, but could you work on your spacing. I mean it was all just a big clump, but other then that it was really good.