A very satisfying resolution to this quietly moving fic. I mean, yes, I would have liked there to be more to the amnesia than just a bump on the head, but the compelling emotional tone of the fic and the way it quietly explores Haruhi and Kyon's inability to fully grasp their feelings for each other makes it feel like that would have been just a bonus to what is at its heart a fully realized story.

Might as well get the minor issues out of the way first:

1) Why does Kyon tell Haruhi that she seemingly teleported herself and him from the school to his bedroom? Putting aside the issue that Haruhi isn't supposed to know she has supernatural powers, wouldn't he expect her to think he's nuts to say something like that?
2) Kyon being able to tell what day it is just by looking at a calendar is a real "Huh?" moment. Yes, Kyon could mark the passing of days on his calendar, but it's a bit odd that he would, you'd think he would realize that the marking of the past few days was done by someone else, and most important, not cluing the reader in on this leaves them adrift.
3) The chapters are needlessly overlong. The one chapter break you have is arbitrary, not corresponding to a development in the plot, a cliffhanger, a lapse of time, or any thematic element, so why not just add two or three more such chapter breaks so you have normal sized chapters?
4) The misused honorifics and backwards names continue to be a distraction.

This is some of the best flirtation between Kyon and Asahina I've ever read. It's so cute that my usual outrage on Haruhi's behalf was silent as I read it. Part of this, I think, is Kyon's possessiveness, contradictory though that might seem; with Kyon's amnesia leaving him with no substantial history with Asahina, that possessiveness becomes so ludicrously baseless that I can't help but grin at it.

"Feed the cat." This is an extraordinarily bad instruction to give someone who loses his memory every ten minutes. I enjoyed seeing Kyon with his sister, though, brief though those moments were.

As with the first chapter, you've done an exceptional job of having the memory loss cycle not be repetitive. The lack of recognition and the notebook reading occur in each iteration, but the tone progresses and builds irrespective of the memory loss, fitting with Koizumi's observation that Kyon retains his mood across iterations.

I also grew to like Kyon's repeatedly thinking Haruhi is his girlfriend without anything suggesting this. It took me perhaps an embarrassing amount of time to figure out, but without his memory, Kyon can't remember all the things Haruhi has done which annoyed or even outraged him, nor her spelling out for him in no uncertain terms that she has no interest in dating; he can only remember his underlying fondness for her. And this motif builds up magnificently to Haruhi's implicit confession to Kyon and his implied reciprocation, both of which are beautifully expressed, and both ultimately heartbreaking due to Kyon's inability to remember them.

Haruhi subsequently giving Kyon the cold shoulder seems deliberately reminiscent of the cold shoulder she gave him at the end of their quasi-date in The Melancholy. In both cases, Kyon is not really to blame for what troubles her, and Haruhi seems to realize this, but she can't help but be put out with him, because she looked to him for a solution, and he let her down.

The whole costume party thread isn't terribly interesting, but the implied kiss is a nicely executed climax to the threads I mention in the previous two paragraphs. This is not a perfect fic, but it is a very evocative one which I have little doubt will still be lingering in my head years later.

Very good opening chapter to this fic overall. There are a lot of familiar themes for amnesia fiction, such as the friends concentrating efforts to cure the amnesia, and the search for a traumatizing event, but they're all executed well and the frequent cycling of the memory loss is a cute wrinkle in the formula. And above all, the characters are consistently depicted faithfully and compellingly.

I like the opening description of Kyon waking up, with its gripping surrealism and disorientation that put me right in Kyon's shoes. The one problem here is the line "Or quite possibly a fanfic."; this is a very stale fourth wall joke, and more importantly, it's not something that Kyon would plausibly think in that situation.

It's unclear why the idea of Haruhi being his girlfriend would even enter Kyon's head on the first occasion, and this first occasion also makes it baffling when he asks the question again and both he and Haruhi act like it wasn't already addressed.

Good use of Kyon's voice otherwise. The repeated memory loss is made clear without undue emphasis, and his snark is authentically sharp, and his metaphors authentically convoluted. I like how he pretends not to have amnesia for Koizumi; it's the sort of pointless fooling around which I wouldn't expect from him but still fits within his character.

You have the characters' names backwards; in Japanese, the family name goes first and the given name second. It's rather perplexing to see this mistake here, since you got the order right in the fic's title.

The use of Japanese honorifics is distracting, especially because, as with the vast majority of fics which use Japanese honorifics, the usage is frequently incorrect. Many instances, especially the line "whose name is supposed to be Koizumi-kun", seem to indicate that you assumed Japanese honorifics are absolute, like honorifics in other languages; in actuality, Japanese honorifics depend on the speaker's specific relationship to the subject, and sometimes even on the specific situation.

I like the bit with the shoes; it's a good realistic detail that most wouldn't have thought of in dealing with the amnesia issue. And it nicely reflects the contrasting characters of Haruhi and Kyon.

Koizumi is also well-portrayed here. Lately I've been encountering fics which seem to reflect an authorial dislike for him, but your depiction of him is honest and accurate, with any derision coming strictly from Kyon.

The SOS Brigade's approach to treating Kyon's amnesia is wonderfully unpredictable, and that's perhaps what most made this a fun read. Holding a reenactment of the fight at the Tsuruya house is an idea that makes perfect sense in the situation but I wasn't prepared for it, and you had me half-convinced it was going to work. Your restraint in sticking strictly to Kyon's perspective pays off well here, because Haruhi's discomfort at replaying a scene that was in its way as traumatic for her as it was for Kyon is palpable even without it being pointed out, and not pointing it out makes her pain feel all the more sympathetic because it seems to go unnoticed. It's a beautiful expression of how much Haruhi cares for Kyon that she would willingly put herself through this to help him.

Fuck! Damn this hurts...

1 review
You deserve it
Sorry,
I'm not good at compliments

Awesome! It's amazing how you managed to write a complete story that basically fit itself neatly into the timeline of the light novels. Very satisfying. Good writing too, although I would've liked to see Kyon saying "yare yare" or at least "good grief" (as it's translated in one of the English editions), but eh, I got the idea.

*Applauds*

I'm impressed. Masks and misdirection is a large part of the Haruhi Suzumiya series and were rarely able to get incite into their true thoughts and feelings. As the narrator we get to see Kyon's mask come off-but as Kyon is an unreliable narrator and openly admits his bias its hard to tell. And as you mentioned Haruhi herself only lets her mask down away from others or when she feels they aren't paying attention. and we get to see some of Nagato's growth as a person and her own view of things especially in Disappearance.

The way each of them attempt to help Kyon is interesting too, Mikuru can do nothing but stay by his side, Haruhi tries to act like everything is normal but in the end gives up but manages to create a change in Kyon. Nagato tries to silently help him but backs off when it appears to hurt him, and Koizumi uses his original method of showing him Espers duties and abilities.

I'm assuming the "Deconstruction" refers to the SOS Brigade loosening their masks in one way or another which is almost an antithesis for what the series stood for?

Lovely. The narrative is excellent. I wrote several stories like this back when Memento came out, but this is probably the best no short term memory story I've read. It meshes well with the Haruhi plot line and maintains a certain status quo by the end. Nice work.

It was a fun read.

I am not one to review things but this was beautiful. The characterization and the reactions of the characters worked really well in bringing the feelings. I swear I felt my eyes watering at that last scene between kyon and haruhi in his room. Very good work here!

Whoa. I just spent the last few hours reading this, and it was amazingly awesome. Hell, it could even be an actually entry in the series. I give this story a 10/10, and I give you a good old thumbs up. Keep up the awesome work, you might become a proper author.

P.S. I know that you write to express yourself and to provide yourself with a form of therapy, but I honestly think that you have the potential to become a full-blown writer.

I really liked this story. At first I thought it was annoying as hell but I'm glad I hung in there. I see now that this annoyance was shared by everyone in the SOS Brigade, especially Haruhi. Great execution of the whole Memento theme.

Solid characterization as always. Excellent technical handling of both retrograde and anterograde amnesia.

Don't give up on writing Insight - as authors, it's sometimes easy to be overly critical of one's writing, but I sincerely feel that Ephemeral is one of the best stories I've read. It is a rare talent to be able to portray emotions in a subtle way - to show and not merely tell readers about the characters' emotions - and to capture that mix of uncertainty and passion that real emotions are made of.

I look forward to your the next update!

I forgotten this was a rewrite as I read it throughout the day, so I had treated this as I would any other story.

Anyway... Amnesia? Not the most original centerpiece of a story's premise ever but it doesn't mean it could be has to be as inconsequential as every other time it's employed.
Reading it through, I thought the style was very... convincing in it's attempt to replicate that of the light novels, as I can recall them. When Kyon was not experiencing immediate grief or sadness, his aloof attitude was usually present.

As it turns out, the amnesia use was stellar. You managed to capture both the frustration of both Kyon and his friends, by both repeating previously revealed information and the inclusion of new information while acting as if they had been there for a while now.
That was annoying for the characters and us readers are lucky enough to share that miserable experience. But that was part of that point.

Almost reaching the second half of the second chapter, I thought this story to be somewhat less ambitious than something I would expect from you but I would soon see how wrong I was.

I thought Haruhi's speculation that maybe Kyon would "prefer not knowing" anything was a home-run. And then, of course, there's the part where Kyon gives his notepad to Haruhi.
Kyon's amnesia, it's true significance was to give Kyon freedom.
Freedom from having to be some kind of mediator between Haruhi, reality, and the supernatural factions.

Everyone pitching in to attempt to bring his memories back, you had a few interesting choices there, especially Nagato's.

I thought that his memory coming back the way it did was a little too predictable but it really was the only way MoSH would go. The only faithful ending I can think of.

So, all in all, a stunning work, as long as one has the patience to allow all the pieces fall into place. And also very faithful to the light novels.

It was wonderful!
And the reminders to Kyon worked great on me as a reader who had forgotten the first chapter, funnily enough.
I did feel that Haruhis wording was awkward at times, but it also seemed like something right oui of the novels, so I suppose it's fine anyway.

Truly surprised at the lack of reviews; deserves more to be sure. Very well written and I was quite invested right through the end. Well done!