|Reviews for Pokemon: Try it again Ash! Kanto|
| PenguinsWithForks chapter 1 . 1/9
The first sentence almost made me stop reading entirely. It is not that hard to use spell check, or a dictionary in order o figure out how a certain word is spelled.
Another issue that I had with your writing is the way you chose to explain to the readers precisely what you meant through the use of parantheses as opposed to showing them what you mean by developing your story properly. If that means beginning earlier in the timeline than you originally intended, then go for it. If you are going to write a story, you shouldn't need to use parentheses to explain it. Show, don't tell the reader. It takes a little longer to develop, but in the end you get rich characters and plot lines that draw in the reader. If you need an example of how not to do this just check out my profile. My writing is bad, and my advice comes from having to take a bunch of classes on how to improve. I know theory and not practice. I wish you luck in your writing endeavors!
| Austin Stuke chapter 64 . 11/11/2016
This was great story!
When is the lengend of hirro satshio coming out?
| ConstrutiveCrit chapter 16 . 10/24/2016
My friend you have less emotion shown with Brock and Misty but with Cilan and Bianca you have much better emotions in play. Ughh
| ConstructiveCrit chapter 14 . 10/24/2016
You don't have a bad story still room for improvement. From what I can see nothing came out of Misty being "depressed" from losing to Ash. I believed it would have led to a story about Misty really wanting to win to have Ash hang around Celadon for a while longer so he can rechallenge and she can see him more. You can add more to this story as it is mostly a bunch of half felt "awesomes" with trainers having too many overpowered Pokemon.
| Austin chapter 64 . 10/19/2016
When will the legend of his to stashio come out
| Austin chapter 64 . 10/19/2016
This was a great story
| Guest chapter 64 . 9/17/2016
| Fanfictionranger chapter 18 . 8/6/2016
I don't get it sorry but is Ash trying now to get all Unova badges? Or is he still going for the Kanto badges?
| Xyoras chapter 7 . 5/21/2016
When dawn comes
Can have three meanings depending on the scenario
1) the arrival of the sun over the eastern horizon
2) the arrival of a person naked Dawn
3) the sexual orgasm of a person naked Dawn
| Name WHAT NAME chapter 64 . 3/11/2016
Well, that was an anti climatic ending. Ash got seperated from his friends... especially Bianca, and now he's given up on being a Pokémon Master. Now he's just trying to find his dad, who ditched the family for some weird reason. Ash is now acting a little jerky and whatnot.
Can't you post the sequel on FanfictionNet? It's really hard to navigate devinantart fanfics from my phone. I hope the dad arc would be over soon. It's a bore compared to the earliar chapters (you know, before the whole 'ash is a frustrated fowl' thing started)
| Danny chapter 64 . 11/18/2015
Hi FanFactor1996, you don't know me, but I enjoyed this story, Try it Again Ash, Kanto! I have a few ideas for your future story and what the title should be: Try it Again Ash, Kanto! Only make it as Rated M and for the couple pairings: make it Ash/Bianca(Kanon) and Dawn/May they made out to be as closeted lesbians. Plus for the chapters that will be sex scenes, especially when its Dawn and May, have them refer to each as baby and May as the dominant in the bed.
| chingon chapter 21 . 11/10/2015
really lesbians, that took all the story to level that pokemon would never go
| Guest chapter 52 . 10/2/2015
The seventh movie is Destiny Deoxys. Lucario and the Mystery of Mew is the eighth
| Master of the Mind chapter 3 . 7/1/2015
You miss counted and skipped 3 and went to 4
| Guest chapter 64 . 6/17/2015
why would you not continue this thats so fricken stupid of you it's a great story