|Reviews for nerds and others radome stuff|
| lionsrcute1 chapter 1 . 9/11/2014
This was the most random thing I've ever read. The plot can be good though! :)
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/5/2014
I'm sorry to be blunt, but this is horrendous. Honestly, this makes absolutely no sense. The majority of your writing is riddled with spelling mistakes and grammatical errors that greatly take away from the content (not that there is any content worth reading), and could have easily been corrected had you taken a moment to look at your work. Furthermore, the plot is completely illogical; the series of events are unrealistic and confusing. Also, your characters hve a severe lack of depth. Your main character, Swimming Pool, which, by the way, is the lamest attempt at a creative name I have ever encountered, is so... you know what? I'm not even going to finish that thought, because I'd wind up writing a rant longer than your story itself. The point of what I'm trying to say is, please try to rise above the writing level of a first-grader. On a side note, I'd also like to comment on your use of the word "retarded". You used it in a deragatory manner, thus discrimminating against a large number of people. Perhaps it would benefit those unfortunate enough to have to listen to your prejudiced termanolgy to do your research. "Retarded" is actually not recognized as a description of low intelligence any longer. The correct word choice would be "intellectually disabled", which should still not be used in that manner. I am truly disgusted that the literature of today includes works such as this jumble of words.
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/5/2014
I'm sorry to be blunt, but this is horrenous. Honestly, the story make absolutely no sense. The majority of it is full of grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. These aren't just small typos; there are far too many to be excusable. Furthermore, the plot is absolutely illogical and the series of events is unrelated and confusing. Even worse are the characters. Your main character, Swimming Pool (which is the worst attempt at a creative name I have ever encountered) is so... you know what? I'm not even going to commwnt on her, as it would result in an extensive rant that would be longer than your story itself. Anyway,, here's some advice: learn to write at a first grade level, because you obviously can't acheive that low standard yet. I am appalled that the literature of our time includes something as pitious as this jumble of words.
| loststorieshogwartz chapter 1 . 12/9/2013
Hey, so the name swimming pool? Where did u get that? And another thing, this story makes zip censor. Please try to go back and correct it other errors
| asassin of the savior chapter 1 . 3/8/2013
i dont mean to flame but...it sucked eggs bigtime where did you learn to write? because wherever you learned to write needs to be sued for unlawful crimes such as wasting my time with this uesless CRAP!
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/27/2012
this makes no sence but is it suposed to? um cute idea but you need a spell check and qoutation marks and commas and if they are thoughts italisize
| carlis inactive account chapter 1 . 6/9/2012
The grammar. It burns.
| ArtieChokeProductions chapter 1 . 5/23/2011
i like it i think thayt you should make more to see where it is going. i think there are a few really good points.
but note ,, it got a bit confusing at Jacksons POV. who was leaving the bathroom?
I like the idea. i want to see where it is going to go.
(i can also understand why you didnt see some of the errors, i guess you were exsited to post this idea right?(Stop me if i am wrong))
but anyway keep writing it sounds good!
V~NK :D 8B :D