|Reviews for The Higher You Get, The Harder You Fall|
| ThouShaltNotFall chapter 1 . 5/13/2013
Please continue! I love this story so far! I love iT .
| logophilia chapter 1 . 11/19/2011
Hm. I like this a lot. Your writing's very good and the only thing I have to complain about is a couple of typos. Please update soon, I want to see where this goes :D
| I-Love-Trunks1 chapter 1 . 6/26/2011
I love this story so much!
Could you please make this story Matt/Scott? Matt being dominant, and Scott being submissive?
Cant wait for more!
| Amethyst Asheryn chapter 1 . 5/26/2011
I feel like I can't say a lot about this since apparently there's more on the way. However, I really liked the first paragraph. That's probably not what you expected, I suppose. But the flow in that first paragraph just struck me as being really great.
In the later bit, I feel like the flow dissintigrates a little, and not in a way that quite enhances the piece. The repetition near the end where he's fighting the Old Ones ("He had to warn them. Escape. Fight. Warn. Help.") is pretty good, but there are other bits where things get kind of weird.
You tend to repeat words in sentences, for example, where you could use a different one and make the flow better. Here, for instance:
"He started attacking more viciously now, and managed to knock a few away, but more came and these were more aggressive."
You use the word "more" three times in that single sentence, which to me is a little distracting. You might change it so it reads "... but the ones he felled were replaced by others, growing only more aggressive."
I admit that may be a little bit too flowery considering the effect you're going for, but it was only an example. :)
Other than that, you did a good job and I'd like to see where this is going.
"breathily exhaled though his mouth."-should be "through".
"Matt's was breathing heavily"-apostrophe and s don't need to be there.
"They pinned him arms"-should be "his arms".
Thanks for writing,