|Reviews for Harry Potter, The New Dark Lord|
| KingRider6911 chapter 14 . 6/13
Really interesting please keep updating!
| 19Shorty chapter 14 . 4/16
the story is cool but it be even cooler if u added Hermione to the relationship between him and Daphne because it keep's Dumble-dork from controlling her and then with Ginny he can adopt her as his sister to keep her safe to from Dumb-as-a-Door but that just my opinion i'm not trying to tell you how to write your story i was just making some friendly suggestions to the its all but hey do whatever the hell you want cause its your story and i'm just reading it and by the way this story is still can't wait for the next chapter please.
| Jen chapter 14 . 3/16
| Mr Mystery chapter 12 . 2/20
Oh, boy, Snape really has put his foot in it this time! I dread to think what
will happen when Harry becomes darker than Voldemort to avenge Ginny and
Hermione. Furthermore, has Daphne's behaviour cost her her husband?
| Mr. Mystery chapter 8 . 2/20
I think that if Harry does become a Dark Lord, he will not be an insane
megalomaniac like Lord Voldemort. I do, however, understand his fear that the
muggles will kill off the wizards and witches, and I have a simple solution for
that: round all the women and girls all up, and neuter them, thus making muggles totally infertile, and incapable of giving birth, while muggle boys and men
would be forced to wear chastity cages.
| Lamorak Korving chapter 6 . 2/20
Hey, this is your own damn story, do what you want with it, I'm already
writing my own, which is called Harry Potter's Secret Sister, and it's not up
for adoption. All I'll say that it's set after the whole school turns against him,
he transfers to a different Hogwarts House.
| Lamorak Korving chapter 5 . 2/20
If you want this to be a multi-fic, I suggest taking 3 girls from each of the
four houses, 1 half-blood, 1 pure-blood and 1 muggle-born. Let's start with
Gryffindor House. From the half-bloods I choose Natalie MacDonald, from the
pure-bloods I choose Parvati Patil, and from the muggle-borns I choose
Angelina Johnson. From the half-bloods of Hufflepuff House I choose Susan
| Mr. Mystery chapter 4 . 2/20
I think it would be unwise for Harry to forgive Molly and Ron, especially in
light of their betrayals and bearing in mind they would do anything to aid Dumbledore and get revenge on Harry. I also find the idea of a Dark Hermione fascinating.
| Guest chapter 2 . 1/6
You know, guys, it isn't really poor grammar or spelling that makes for a bad story, although those definitely don't help. It's things like the monty haul problem (note the U), explained further here: /Main/MontyHaul .
For those unable to access the link, the gist of it is that the monty haul problem describes situations originating from tabletop rpgs where the characters are given so much loot it ends up being stupefyingly meaningless. It's as if gold grew like weeds and fell from the sky as rain. Or in gaming terms, you're give so many boosts you become op as crap and the game master has to resort to throwing gods at your party to fight because nothing else is even remotely a challenge.
Similarly, in fanfiction it's not too hard to spot monty haul stories. Harry suddenly comes into a massive inheritance, and usually it's not just one, oh no, not merely one vault but a whole bunch of them, hell let's toss in the Founders as well, I mean he's already supposedly the Heir of Gryffindor why not make him the heir for all the rest. This isn't even looking at the ass pull bajillion amount of gold in said vaults.
And that's just the vaults, nevermind all the girls who suddenly flock to him, or the supposedly lost magics that he is suddenly revealed to be the sole inheritor to. As if that wasn't enough, this particular story tosses in the damn Hogwarts castle, and then freaking Azkaban to boot. At least he isn't the messiah who somehow reunites the goblins behind him (or maybe that happens in a later chapter), although I'm guessing there's a solid chance he gathers all the Deathly Hallows and becomes immortal, because if you've read this little rant up to here you would see this coming miles away.
I'm all for the occasional stomp but when it's this blatant and no hint of the story being a parody it's just tiresome. You could heap all of these advantages on a squib like Mrs Figg and she could be op as hell too. Point being all this loot and power and shit are crutches, and a good writer should be able to smell this trap far enough away to avoid painting himself into a corner with it. If Harry owned so much damn money and power there wouldn't BE a story, he'd just buy his way into power (like everyone else in the wizarding world does) and let his wealth take care of his problems. It'd be a boring-ass story of Harry throwing money at yet another obstacle and then proceeding to the next.
Let's face it. If any of us were that stupid rich, we wouldn't be living the daily grind anymore. Harry would take his ass out of that deathtrap of a school, get the best private magic tutors money can buy, and hire a bodyguard of Hit Wizards to defend himself while also putting out a huge bounty on Death Eaters so that all the mercenaries in the world would be falling over themselves to bag as many of them as they could. It'd just be a Ye Olde generic rich-guy-hires-mercs-to-take-care-of-bad-guys story. And while that has its charms, I bet most of us didn't come here for that. So, screw that, and screw this story.
| LoveSpock chapter 14 . 1/5
Will you continue this storyline? You've probably heard that question many times by now.
| Zorahvion chapter 14 . 1/4
God, this story was just cliche after cliche with them coming over and over again. Then there's the grammatical errors. So many grammatical errors. Anyway, I get that you want to make a Powerful!Harry or a Rich!Harry, but you didn't even try to make it unique or anything. The only thing that happens in the first eight chapters is explaining why Harry can just best everyone into a bloody pulp with his fat stacks of platinum. Also, WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT BEHIND ADDING THE PLATINUM BULLSHIT!? That also leaves the dismal and lack there of logic. First, Harry could pretty much slap a ring on about anything in the world and call it his wife due to how much fucking money and power you gave him and he chooses the one witch who sent a single letter? Seriously, the only thing he benefits from it is a trophy girlfriend from a Pureblood family that's not really that predominant with trace amounts of Pureblood facts and etiquette with a small dish of history. He could get anyone else in the world to teach him this stuff and they would be about 500% less bitchy and whiny than this iteration of Daphne. Also, why the hell couldn't Harry just use the other power you gave him to just learn this shit in a week or something, you sure as hell weren't opposed to doing that with offensive spells. I get the whole "insider viewpoint" that Daphne was spouting while trying to make herself important to the boring storyline right up until I noticed that it was the embodiment of a copy/paste of a wiki page detailing this stuff. It kinda destroys the whole reason for her being there. But I digress, this story is just another Uber!Harry with no ambition to being something other than a cliche riddled rag.
But wait, I just have one more thing to rant about. You know when Harry brings Hermione back to his place then Daphne gets all 'ur sleeping on teh koutch, bich' on him? Yeah, I get the fact that her over-sized pride with a small order of arrogance on the side is ruined due to him fighting without her, but the fact that she gets bitchy and whiny about him SAVING THE LIVES OF HIS FUCKING FRIENDS is pure bullshit. Either way she's just straight up being an ass, or she's just being a jealous dunce is up for grabs. Also, in reference of the last statement, how the hell could you be jealous of two girls THAT JUST HAD BOTH OF THEIR PARENTS KILLED IN FRONT OF THEM?!
Alright, I'm really done now.
| Snow Jane Winter chapter 14 . 12/12/2015
Miss, are you going to update anytime soon?...
| Haze chapter 1 . 10/29/2015
I just wanted to be the 400th reviewer lol
| Ppsh chapter 3 . 10/12/2015
Can't help but think this is a little stupid the way Harry just signs a marriage contract with her. It's his first conversation with her, she blatantly admits she just wants his power, and most importantly he is probably the most politically (and certainly the most financially) powerful man in the wizarding world, or entire world. What on earth does he really gain from this union? One teen girl with a tight body, and her flimsy dark arts & pureblood knowledge (how much could a teenager really know)? He could hire an army of tutors in every subject imaginable, and a harem of supermodels to suck his dick on command, if he wanted. Instead, he binds himself to the first girl who sends him a letter. I can't help but feel like that kind of shits on the very idea of 'independant!Harry'. Maybe I'm being pedantic, and it's not like him having like 400 billion galleons & owning half the wizarding world can be taken that seriously either, but I mean... cmon.
| debsel chapter 14 . 8/10/2015
hope you continue this story soon!