|Reviews for Echoes|
| Twiners chapter 21 . 4/18/2013
Didn't see the twist ending coming. I'd imagine it would be reassuring to know there are other people jumping universes out there. Also I find myself hoping they learn to jump with more accuracy to target things they want to see.
| Twiners chapter 20 . 4/18/2013
| Twiners chapter 19 . 4/18/2013
I like Perverted Naruto. I really feel like he isn't used to his full potential on this site.
| Twiners chapter 18 . 4/17/2013
I don't really have much input to give on this chapter except that I still find a fem Gaara creepy. I'm really just writing this to help boost your review count because your story is awesome.
| Infamous Storm chapter 5 . 4/17/2013
Again, good chapter.
I will hold my criticisms about the writing style and prose until chapter twenty.
I will say though that I really enjoy your characterization.
| Twiners chapter 17 . 4/16/2013
Too tired to review!
| Twiners chapter 16 . 4/16/2013
My favorite part of the chapter was your backstory for the August Star and how Madara and his brother came in contact with it. I felt like Puppeteer Naruto's chakraless puppet was a bit deus ex machina but that's just my opinion. Gaara being female...eh, it's a big multiverse so I guess anything is possible. On the whole I liked the chapter though.
| Twiners chapter 15 . 4/16/2013
You've definitely succeeded in capturing my interest. I'm interested to see what's going to happen to the Madara crew. All things considered a good chapter. God Kakashi is a punk ass bitch in this story...but then again he was kind of a punk bitch in canon. I'm glad Zabuza punched his face in.
| Parahelion Zenith chapter 14 . 4/16/2013
Just wondering. Did the Oogakari detect Mikaboshi's presence? Why didn't they do anything or warn them, or something? I mean, I understand that they can't interfere, but they could warn someone, like telling Sasori along with the probable mention of Pein and the Rinnegan.
| Parahelion Zenith chapter 11 . 4/16/2013
Ok, so I just wanted to say, I love this story, the finality of it, and how you are actually exploring alternate ideas rather than just rehashing canon with a few Deus-Ex-Machina changes.
I wanted to bring up my ideas on Kushina. While I was horrified at first with the idea that Naruto could have been spared, as I have thought about it, I am fairly certain that Kushina's declaration was more a desperate mother's final attempt to protect her child than something Kushina could have actually done. Minato, with the help of the Death God itself, could only seal half of the Kyuubi's chakra away, and Kushina was supposed to somehow bind all of it and drag it into the underworld by her self? I feel that if she tried that, she would have taken some of its power, but it would have remained free, Minato would have had to seal it anyway, and Naruto would have been left without that last impression of his mother.
Anyway, again, great story. I look forward to seeing what other turns it takes.
| Guest chapter 14 . 4/16/2013
wow that was great.
| Twiners chapter 14 . 4/15/2013
I liked the chapter but can understand how it could be confusing for someone who hadn't read the story. The story reminds me of the show Sliders. If you haven't seen it some people get sucked into a dimensional portal and have to jump into different realities trying to get back home and they have a specific amount of time to get to the portal before they're stuck there. This is pretty random but I think the Madara with all the swords is creepiest.
| Infamous Storm chapter 4 . 4/15/2013
Again interesting chapter.
However I must note something. Feel free to take it with a grain of salt.
In these chapters I noticed that you repeated words to inject drama. For example:
He was happy (X 21)
You could have made it extremely effective by using this literary technique called a tricolons crescens
He was happy.
Ohhhhh, he was happy.
In fact he wasn't just happy, he was gleeful, the type of mirth that made sunshine's and rainbows want to burst out of your chest.
"No your not."
Notice the difference? Granted, I overdid the last one a bit however repeating something in a couple of different ways with more descriptiion and escalation can help to inject drama.
Hopefully this helped in some small way.
| Twiners chapter 13 . 4/15/2013
I'm still trying to figure out how a tree can wear armor but other than that I think it's a solid chapter. I'm excited for the next one because I like the Yet Again team.
| no can do chapter 43 . 4/15/2013
Remind me who the Teikoku are/is again? Is it the aggressive Zetsu?