|Reviews for Echoes|
| sendicard chapter 14 . 7/14/2012
Kishin is fucking hilarious. No seriously, that is on an entire new level.
Hmm, I honestly feel that the characters of "yet again" just don't fit into your story. They ruin the feel. I simply don't like them in this, they breach and stomp around. It doesn't feel right. I like both stories but together, the balance is ruined. If they do show up again, I hope it isn't for a very long time.
That darkness in Naruto's heart though. I wonder how that will be messed with by the Shinigami's power. Ooh, the possibilities.
Well, I have to go... Bye!
| sendicard chapter 13 . 7/14/2012
Poor Nicknamer. He is screwed with so much, even by his container.
Hmm, the rest of the chapter has drawn attention I see. I really have no comment on it, I am kind of spacing it right now.. Sorry..
| sendicard chapter 12 . 7/13/2012
"What? It's actually in the bingo book!" You know... I don't doubt it.
Well that was depressing. Meh, nice plot point set up though. You really do know how to wing it! Seriously doubt you wung that though...
Freaking clan wars.. Ha, classic. Guessing we are sticking with Arashi though? Totally cooler.
Well... I am going to bed. Like, right now.
| sendicard chapter 11 . 7/13/2012
Hmm, beat the shit out of Kyuubi? No problem.
Well I kind of stumbled into random ass crisis right as I finished reading this chapter, so I don't really remember anything worth mentioning. Sorry, on the off hand. Wonder how this world happened...
| sendicard chapter 10 . 7/13/2012
Ooh, some character death here. Always interesting.
You had an order error when listing the people who treated Naruto nicely. Iruka was mentioned second, yet the ramen stand was mentioned directly after that as the second one he stated. Not a large error, just something to notice.
Hmm, that was a pretty awesome chapter. Battle was at least... Kind of realistic. As realistic as that gets anyway. Multiple character death here, not a single true enemy beaten yet. God damn Kyuubi is going psycho. Yep, definitely fun.
| sendicard chapter 9 . 7/13/2012
Ahh, the average twisted parent of a "demon" past. Sucks doesn't it? Bet it even sucks writing it.
Ahh, telling him directly, greatest secret ever.
Kakashi, who better to get horrible relationship advice from?
That advice is hilarious.. Glad she is already in love with him or that could have gone down pretty bad.
"Apparently, you taught sensei some 'tricks', which he then taught to Chibaku, who then used them to win Sakura over." Wow, I have seen some funny errors but that.. Freaking woot man.
Wow, that is one hell of a chapter end. Yes, shit is indeed crazy. Haha, wonder how many of each side will die.
| sendicard chapter 8 . 7/13/2012
I hate to say it but the scrolls were error stricken, I know you were trying to make them sound ancient but you made them sound broken instead. It doesn't even look ancient, it just looks like you decided to screw up your wording by taking out a word once or twice per sentence and going, "looks good enough for me." If you want to make it look wise, make it sound wise. Don't just make a screw up every three or four words while spouting knowledge and call it good. There, I gave some true criticism. At least now I can feel a little happy knowing I am not wasting your time with blind praise.
Jiraya fucked up his training too? I swear, we have a very long list of people to execute... Yes, very long list. Too bad it won't happen, ugh. I want to see vengeance! I think I might be closer to Kitsune's side. They should pay. At least, the ones of the conspiracy in general.
Am I the only one who thinks Kitsune is rather strong for someone who is untrained? Those voices are not insanity. No, it can't do something like give him abilities like that. They are something much more powerful, something monstrous. I look forward to seeing how you plan to do something with them. It sounds fun.
"You remind me of your dead husband." FUUUUUUU! That moment where you just absolutely have to shout to the sky, "Fuck you puppet master!"
Ahh, she saw right through his lie, too bad he won't be able to take up on that offer.
Freaking banjo... Wow, that is just great. Wonder how they will react when they hear how that conversation really went.
Well, I now have things to do so don't expect my next review until far later. I did enjoy it by the way, thanks!
| sendicard chapter 7 . 7/13/2012
Hmm, some serious plot hole patching. Nice job at your goal. You have made quite a bit of progress. Sadly, I really don't doubt your answers either. They make an overly large amount of sense, at least compared to most fanfiction.
Hmm, kind of curious as to how all this plays out though. Very curious.
| sendicard chapter 6 . 7/12/2012
Nice reference there, I wouldn't have gotten that if a friend of mine hadn't shown me that song a while back.
Hmm, yes. Your idea on the Uzumaki bloodline is actually rather convincing. If I didn't know better I would say it was canon. Nice work.
You really are playing out the insanity quite well, it feels real. A bit over done at times but also very fun. Yes, fun indeed.
Well, I am looking forward to seeing what happens next so why not? Turn the page.
| sendicard chapter 5 . 7/12/2012
I just realized why I am having such a hard time picking up errors. These chapters have been rewritten more times than the constitution.
Of all the words to use to describe her, you used Carcass? I mean, I know it can mean "body of a human" but it normally means dead body.
Hmm, well that was interesting, while there is a conflict, it is kind of sad that they keep having to leave the worlds on the run, really quickly. They can't really do anything.
You know, I actually thought you were going to kill off Naruko there. I was like, "Shit... That sucks."
| Demon of shadows chapter 2 . 7/12/2012
| Demon of shadows chapter 1 . 7/12/2012
this is a very interesting idea with a good start to the story
| sendicard chapter 4 . 7/12/2012
Ahh, a Naruto who spent time with Hinata, and lost to his demon. Yes, I do like the prospect. Too bad it kind of makes the villagers right about him... Well, that him at least.
An interesting conversation with himself, yes Naruto really has matured. It fits.
Hmm, yes I do like how this is working. Twists and turns, you spare nothing. A truly wondrous style.
| sendicard chapter 3 . 7/11/2012
Hmm, I did enjoy myself. So far things are just setting themselves up.
You know what I really like about this story? Not the skill, which is a plenty on this site.
Not the moments themselves, no what I like is the feeling.
This story feels like it has a point. It feels like it has a real conflict, not just an endless echo in a hallway of never finishing words. Yes, I like the feel in this very much, it feels like a real piece of writing. Like I am reading a book, yes I like that a lot.
| sendicard chapter 2 . 7/11/2012
Hmm, that was pretty awesome. Yes, I was right, it didn't disappoint me. No, it was definitely enjoyable.
The way you run the character development, the way it all mixes. Oh yes, definitely worth my time.
Enough blind praise though, should point out something wrong. Hmmm, you over use commas. I mean, so do I but it isn't for lack of knowledge. I simply don't care when I am not writing something important. You also do a few comma splices.
Well, guess I should move on to next chapter, do some other things. Cause you know, I can't even read without being interrupted multiple times.