It was good of Harry to meet Remus Lupin and go to the gravesite where his father and mother are buried.

It's good of the Greengrasses to invite Harry over.

Hermione will need to make adjustments to fit into the Slytherin students routine.
Finding out about Nicholas Flamel will get them started on the pursuit of the Stone.

Harry and Draco had a conflict over who would run Slytherin in the first year. First Draco put Harry in a closet, before Harry punched out Draco.

Harry makes a new friend in Neville and starts to develop a ally in Severus Snape.

Harry is being quite ambitious in looking to change Slytherin.

I don't see any chemistry between HarryDaphne, they hang out and study together with the gang and that just it. I'm not saying that I hate the pairing it's the opposite I like the pair, they're one of the first pair I read and I like them but this make it feel like they being force to like each other and it make the pair so awkward. Let's be honest, Daphne although have some improvement still being a cunt but I'll see how it turn out.

A nice introduction to the Greengrasses for Harry Potter to start the story in the beginning.

House systems like Hogwarts are not unique, most British schools have them as a peer pressure form of discipline, my junior school had Romans, Trojans and Spartans, my secondary school named then after the surrounding villages and my college named them after admirals. The reason we don't see much in the book is that to Rowling they're normal, she just made the divisions starker and more complete than we normally see

let me get my criticisms out of the way. you gave a very dry way of writing, it lacks some of the energy and fire of some other authors and can make reading a little difficult for me here and there. that said you also have good economy with words that keeps your story moving at a good clip. I suppose I get to see if these notes hold up in the coming chapters. good work overall.

II lllove this!

Wow, man. you had me panicking when i thought this was the last chapter. glad this isn't abandoned.

this is so well written, but i wish you had a beta to fix all the were/we're/where and of course you're/your mistakes. it's a small error but really screws with the immersion for me.

For Pete’s sake….

4 children aged 11;
who are the sole heirs
to their Noble Houses!

The children are brought to Hagrid at 11PM and expected to accompany him into the Forbidden Forrest to find what beast or creature is committing the unpardonable crime of killing Unicorns for their blood. T

So, Hagrid is on probation for multiple crimes and endangering students. Hagrid cannot legally carry a wand or perform magic. Hagrid has a short temper and has still been known to “hex” illegally (e.g., Dudley in July 1991).

“Hagrid has my full Trust”.
-Albus Dumbledore

Dumbledore is an idiot to trust Hagrid’s judgment. How dare Dumbledore send four First-year students so late at night with practically no safeguards into The Forbidden Forrest….. with Hagrid?!

Dumbledore has a God-Complex and he readily plays fast and loose with other people’s lives.

This DETENTION is an Act of Criminal Negligence! Hagrid endangered 4 students: moreover they happen to be the sole heirs of very wealthy & ancient Magical families.

Hagrid foolishly left 3 of the 4 11-year-old wizards who barely know how to use their wands in what he knew to be an Acromantula hunting ground. That’s practically manslaughter.

I know that this DETENTION was Dumbledore’s idea. How he involved Severus Snape, I am unsure. Severus
always trues to protect his students.
Hagrid was doing what he was told.
But, DUMBLEDORE should have foreseen that Hagrid could not protect these children.

If any one of these Firsties, Draco Abraxas Malfoy, Theodore Nott, Jr., Neville Franklin Longbottom or Harry James Potter had been killed by either acromantula or Quirrelmort, it would have been a MONUMENTAL DISASTER and might have shut down the School.

DUMBLEDORE is stupidly LAX if not criminally negligent in caring for his magical charges. Should be sacked &
charged with depraved indifference & egregious Child Endangerment.

Hagrid, the moron, separates
the children so that Harry Potter
& Neville Longbottom are alone
(Only with Fang, boarhound)

Harry & Neville are attacked by
Man-eating Acromantula spiders.
They have to kill at least 4 before
the children are almost overrun
and turned into Spider Chow.

Can HHarry just kiill Draco !now

Still loving iit! Harry needs to be really powerful!

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