|Reviews for Audience: An Artist's Story|
| 1Thunderfire chapter 2 . 8/6/2011
Wow, this is really original and since I can't quite think of any truly thoughtful comments/words worthy of such a story; I'll just say that I enjoyed reading this very much. :)
| James Terrazen chapter 2 . 7/14/2011
I won't cheapen this moving tale by filling my review of it with cheap words. I can tell that the story you told here is filled with love, respect, feeling, and meaning, and I would hate to demean that. Therefore, I have but one thing to say about this piece.
Keep up the good work.
| Kattheamazing chapter 2 . 6/18/2011
Yes! Error type 2 is gone! I can haz review box!
Well what can I say? This was just another awesomely written chapter, and what a great pickup from the last. Obviously the tense of the writing switched, but I have a soft spot for present tense because two of my favourite stories of all time on FanFiction were written that way. I have to say, you pull it off with just as much spark, and it looks like you're using it to its best effect. In think it adds a feeling of realism to the story- and seeing as it is loosely based on real life events/ people that's just the effect you want it have.
I also liked this chapter because more than ever, it's pulling the story in a character-driven direction rather than a plot-driven one. As a wise man once told me (literally, a wise person actually told me this!) character-driven stories are always bound to be deeper and more meaningful, and what's deeper and more meaningful than this fic? It fleshes out characters to the point where you can literally see them/ hear them, and using music as its medium, it conveys philosophies, emotions and ideas that never cease to intrigue me.
An example of this would be Meta and Samus' album, which tells the stories of each of their characters without any more obvious description being necessary. It's an indirect but immensely smart way of building them- an idea I've never come up with myself, and an idea that I probably never would have come up with until reading this story.
Moving on slightly, is it weird that I can completely relate to Luigi's apprehension about calling Meta and Samus? You wrote it so well I was actually cringing when I read the conversation between him and Meta. Cringing but finding it oddly amusing at the same time. Oh, beloved awkwardness, the bane of our lives. Good job Samus saved them from the awkward pit of doom in the nick of time XD. You did a great job with that scene because it felt scarily real.
Oh, and yes, I enjoyed the pun, and I don't even like puns!
Yay, we're all about to get together to form a team of awesomeness that will rule the world with music! Ahem, I mean, plot development! In all seriousness though, I can see this is going to be one heck of a story. It has begun great, and is heading for further greatness. I can only wait with excitement to see what the combination of all three music artists can pull off, and what kind of character bonding/ development might happen between them.
Ah, hiatus, something I have considered retracting into several times. I like the way you based this event on a real one because when people on FanFiction go into it, especially people you've befriended, it's very sad. Like those events, the emotion in this part of the story felt just as genuine. Especially Luigi's (or, I could say, your own) powerful desire to offer inspiration and help to the person in need of it. I've seen you giving great advice around this site to people who have given up, and I can see how this part of the story links Luigi to you and those moments in reality.
Heh heh...I read Foxpilot's comment about mine and Soundwave's kids and I can only agree. They would probably end up overthrowing us and taking over the world. Thank heavens the characters are influenced by us and not the other way round!
Ahh, I didn't realise the meetings between Samus, Luigi and Meta were based on our PM conversations and such. How interesting! It's cool the see how people interpret things like that, although I doubt the awkward element was inspired by any conversations between you and Soundwave XD
Overall, fantastic chapter! The reason why I'm not panicking about writing this review is because we officially have a new internet modem! I'm so happy: I now have all-day internet access! Although it does tend to stop working randomly, it usually fixes itself sooner or later, so this should make communicating/ reviewing/ reading a lot easier.
I'm glad you managed to get this fic back on the rails. The chapter didn't seem too short to me, but even so, I look forward to the longer one you have in mind. You have my best wishes for writing it :)
| Foxpilot chapter 2 . 6/16/2011
SoundwaveXKat...Their mutant robo-crack children shall rule the world with a mixture of absurdity, humor, and sheer weirdness! ...No? Perhaps one day, then.
It's been a long time since I've seen someone be this bold. You're taking people who you've befriended, who've supported you, and turning them into Smashers not to fight an evil like Tabuu, but as a tribute to those who have made you what you are. I'd say you're a bit early to write something like this, but everyone like flattery. That, and it's never too early to say "thank you" to a good friend.
You know, it's difficult sometimes to look at a story and say, "How can I improve this? How much help does this person need?" Frankly, I'm finding it extremely difficult to see anything truly bad with this. Other than the fact that it comes off as a bit arrogant-it may be a thank you, but you're still writing about yourself-it's an incredible piece with a lot of heart in it. If I were you, I wouldn't even try to work around the arrogance factor-make it your servant instead and use it as another way to convey your feelings. Some people may call this sappy mush, but a little pride stiffens things up pretty well.
Well, I've seen this, like I said (it took too long, though) and I'm impressed. I look forward to seeing all of your friends' Smasher forms, as some of them are likely to be very interesting. Jimbo's, especially, should be funny.
Future reviews for this will likely not be as long. You've come a long way from "Words and Action," and you should be proud of yourself. Congratulations.
| Red chapter 1 . 6/6/2011
I think you did great, it's a very captivating piece, and I hope you write another story with a similar note, the lyrics were pretty nice, too, and truly, I hope you keep on like this
| Kattheamazing chapter 1 . 6/5/2011
I'm back! Huzzah :D. Really sorry for not getting to this sooner, but my internet connection ended up pimp-slapping me after all :(
This was amazing. Honestly. Sometimes you wonder if it's even possible to ensure a story is captivating without adding heaps and heaps of action and/or dialogue, but you sir, have done just that. This was such a great start, too. You conveyed Luigi's passion for music at the beginning without being melodramatic (thank goodness- there's far too much melodrama going on around this site for my liking), and you did so beautifully, may I add. Some fantastic writing there. This part of the story was neither rushed nor too slow, and what's even better, it was fascinating. Coming from me, that means a lot. You see, as much as I love philosophy, I hadn't found a story to date including any that actually managed to keep my attention. That was, until I read this, and man, can you write it. Just amazing. Safe to say, you have me hooked from here on out.
I went through this, copying and pasting all of the songs listed that I hadn't heard before into Grooveshark so that I could give them a listen. All I can say is damn, Luigi must have some guitar skills! They were all great, and will, when I have a bit more money, be added to my iTunez. Note the z. It's because I'm cool (or more likely because I don't know how to spell XD). Ahem...sidetracked...
Moving swiftly on! The next part of the story was just as good, but for different reasons. To be honest, I actually adored the performance. There was so much emotion there, and you tied it in so that it flowed comfortably with the rest of the narrative and kind of...empowered it, I guess. I just found this part very moving, especially at the end. I swear I could just TASTE (yes taste!) Luigi's horror at everyone leaving. I think it's because there are situations like that in everyone's lives, and so I could relate. In think this scene was even more cruel, however, than something that might have happened in real life. That's because the lyrics were freaking amazing! If you came up with those yourself, then you ought to be a songwriter. No joke. I haven't come across lyrics like that in a while, especially with all the crap (I mean, manufactured pop music) going around these days. If Words and Action is a real song and not one that you named after your contest entry (which was a nice little nod, by the way) then I'm going to go listen to it. And if not, you need to make it into a real song so I CAN listen to it, dammit! (kidding, but that would be awesome XD).
Nice characterisation, too. I can imagine Meta Knight as a real person now, and it's all thanks to you, which goes to show that you truly did put the right amount of thought into that. And dude...dude...you seriously based a character off me? And an awesome one, too? That's so sweet of you! I feel more appreciated than I can put into words, and not just for that, but for everything- for this story (this gift), and for your friendship. I may not have been on fanfiction that much recently, but you didn't just forget me like I would expect most of the people on here to do. For that, thank you. Thank you very much :)
Ohhh damn. My hour is ticking away! :O (sweatdrops)
I'd better conclude this quick...but then again, there isn't a lot left for me to say. I'll be following this from here on out, so you can be sure you'll at least have someone to comment on each chapter. I hope you can continue this soon, as it's set up to be fantastic. And lastly, once again, thank you very much for your consideration- it truthfully means more than I can say :D
| The Stupendous Jimbo chapter 1 . 6/3/2011
*clap clap clap* Not bad, not bad at all! I like this one. It's interesting, and it's different. See usually you find stories about smashers prevailing in a sort of tournament like scenario, but this one attracts me the most cause well, believe it or not, I'm a musician! I know! I've been playing Piano for about 3 year (still not good, bleck!) and composing for only 6 months. Believe it or not I want to actually compose professionally for videogames or films. Long, long dream ahead, but I digress. (Yes I'm aware you know all this; trying to be funny. *Fails*)
Now of course, as a musician, I gotta say what most musicians will say, and you may not like this, buuuut; it's gotta be said. Dude. There's no way in hell anybody can pick up a guitar and in one year learn 4 cover tracks, arrange music for them, and simultaneously play the Djembes while at the same time maintaining a good, balance rhythm. Now it's not impossible, and yeah, you REALLY gotta work your butt off in order to do that considering the guitar is also a muscle development game that takes a good couple of years to completely loosen up. Obviously Luigi here's a prodigy. I mean dude, you're telling me in one year, he learns how to play the guitar, quite well, then he learns music theory and how to notate musical cues accompanied by a healthy selection of harmonic chord progressions, and apply them to an album that he's just about ready to sale? This guy DEFINITELY has talent...*sigh*, to have that kind of talent...*more sighs*
As for the story, as I said, I really like this one. It's definitely a classic tale of a musician's worst nightmare taking a turn for the best. Definitely something I'll keep an eye on in case you decide to continue with. And the best part of this story is that it isn't clichéd. That's practically a God-send, dude. A story about a music loving guy wanting to make his mark for the sake of his art. And it's not over the top! Kudos, good sir, kudos!
As for those lyrics, they make great poetry, but in order to use it in a song, you need to lay the rhythms out a certain way. The first couple of stanzas and verses were rhythmically alright, but then the chorus, bridge, five more versus, it appeals more towards a poetic standpoint and it'd be hard to turn that into a music song. But it's plausible, and though it's a long shot, if I learn how to arrange music for bands, I'd like to give it a shot. It definitely has what lyrics need: personal. This is the kind of lyrics that definitely showcase your trials as a writer here, and you can feel the emotions, which is double plus.
Overall, great story, and thanks for the gift. Appreciate it!