|Reviews for A Priestly Sum|
| Ally chapter 6 . 6/26/2011
OMFG! Im speechless!
The mysterious man is Neals dad! I kinda figured it out when I read this line: "I've been waiting for 30 years."
Wow fantastic story! Love it!
Very nicely done :)
Ohh I loved the way you wrote Neals thoughts on the terrace and thanks for his bare skin hahah
The whole thing involving Steph...OMG! I could never imagined that!
And the ending...which side would Neal choose? oh my...its a very big decision!
I wanna a sequel Val! haha
Congrats on the amazing job :)
| Ally chapter 5 . 6/26/2011
you made me laugh right in the beginning when Mozzie asked Neal: "Did I miss the invitation to the costume party again?" hahah I pictured both faces in my mind haha
Also loved Neal walking into the bullpen dressed as Fr. Halls! (so yummy haha) What he said to the agents was hilarious! haha
And you made Mozzie even better..."My name is Dante Haversham and I'm a gambling addict." Lol perfect! I had no idea he would go there haha btw, liked when he called Steph secret suit haha
Well, I gotta say...I think Mozzie has a crush on Mrs. Suit haha so sweet of him giving her a rose :)
| Carol chapter 6 . 6/16/2011
Chapter 6 review and final story review.
"How did you get them to show you the print?" Neal asked.
"I just asked," Mozzie replied as if Neal had asked a ridiculous question.
Lol! I love Mozzie!
Lancaster, Ca! Dropping A LOT of familiar names! hahaha
I really liked this:
"Or I could just tell her why I want to know," Neal finally said.
"Or you could just tell her why you want to know," Mozzie repeated.
Mozzie: "Are you sure you trust her?"
I really like the pairing of Neal and Stephanie. You've made me think of their intimate time together :) I always want more detail but you've given quite a bit for the imagination,lol.
Neal's thoughts while out on the terrace in the wee hours of the morning. Effing brilliant!
I had a feeling the mystery man was Neal's father.
Oh Wow! The whole reveal from Stephanie to Neal about EVERYTHING! Effing fantastic!
Loved this line:
"There are no coincidences or accidents in life, Neal, you've had angels looking out for you all your life. You just didn't know it."
Great story! Kept my interest. Super job on both the main story about the treasure and the side story case.
This story was so good! I read it twice! Lol
Your best story so far! I loved it!
Gah! The ending! What a choice for Neal! You made it so hard for him. Great job!
| Carol chapter 5 . 6/16/2011
Chapter 5 - Another great chapter!
Things that stood out:
Neal walking into the bullpen at the FBI dressed as a priest, and what the agents yell out to him. Lol!
"It means you're not guilty," Peter answered. "I'm not sure how innocent you are yet."
"My name is Dante Haversham and I'm a gambling addict." Hahaha! Great surprise sending Mozzie in! I didn't see that coming :) hehe!
Neal to Stephanie about his first instinct that it was Mozzie who stole the treasure. Loved the line:
"Why not? Mozzie is capable of things you can't even begin to imagine," Neal laughed.
So true! ;)
Mozzie coming to the meeting with what he found out at GA. Hahaha calling Stephanie "secret suit"!
Loving this so much and could see this play out in a real episode of White Collar! You could submit this to Jeff Eastin as your application to be a writer for the show! I'm serious! :)
| Carol chapter 4 . 6/16/2011
Chapter 4 had me laughing out loud! It was so good!
Love how Neal is all excited to be called in on the case. Neal running up the stairs and huge grin :) He loves crimesolving with Peter! hehe
Neal asking "Is Stephanie on the Speakerphone?" made me laugh out loud. Brilliant.
Jade. Le Moyne College. Nice! :) Love how you've thrown MANY familiar names into the story.
Oh, poor Neal - benched right after being called in.
Neal's protests of "We're not dating!" Yeah - sure! Lol
Ooooh good line! Mozzie to Neal:
Mozzie, "You're either one of them, or one of us, and you, my friend, have spent way too long sitting on the fence already."
OMFG NEAL AS A PRIEST! I'm dying of laughter!
Very funny exchange with Peter and Neal when Neal wants out of his anklet and such, and Peter telling him to wear longer pants. lmao!
About the score: WOW...June and Cindy are in on this with Stephanie. Holy Cow!
"How long are we going to keep this from Neal?" "He's not ready for the truth yet."
| Carol chapter 3 . 6/15/2011
OMG! What a great chapter! I really loved Neal and Stephanie is his apt. the morning after. Her wearing his shirt. His pile of clothing on the
I laughed out loud at several parts of this chapter! Great writing!
Peter and Neal interaction is fantastic. You really wrote them well. Also, loved the conversation between El & Peter.
It had been awhile since I read Chapters 1& 2 so I read those again and then this chapter.
The case fic on the side is very interesting. Still wondering what Stephanie has up her sleave!
Okay, I think I'll read straight through and review at the end. Kudos so far on what you have. Fantastic story. I'm enjoying it. Only thing that would make this better is if I could watch it play out on screen.
| RCs Fix chapter 6 . 6/12/2011
Wow, I didn't think anyone had ever heard of the Lancaster CA. Typewriter museum. (I actually have no idea if there is such a thing)
OK, I like Stephanie now.
Great story, great twists.
Anyone checking reviews prior to reading, dive in, thoroughly enojoyable!
| RCs Fix chapter 5 . 6/12/2011
I loved that the story has twisted and I loved your Mozzie.
| RCs Fix chapter 4 . 6/12/2011
I'm enjoying the story. Again I'm not sure if I should like Stephanie or not. Is she good or is she bad? Two more chapters and hopefully I'll find out.
| C8H7N3O2 chapter 6 . 6/9/2011
*screams* you can NOT leave it there! Do you have more planned? Yes, right? Please?
Yes to answer what you said above.. I can totally see Matt and Tim, as well as everyone else playing this out!
This totally could of been an episode! Like... Like yea.
He does choose to be a good boy and tell Peter.. Right? Gah! *freaks out*
/sorry - I tend to get a little passionately wrapped in stories. Carry on.
| C8H7N3O2 chapter 4 . 6/9/2011
Ok firstly.. How did Neal even get that outfit on? I woulda thought anything like that would of caught fire the moment he touched it - and not because of how hot he is either.
Secondly... They're ALL in on it?
I have got to know where this is going...
| C8H7N3O2 chapter 3 . 6/9/2011
OMG DUDE! Like I can't even right now... This is so good!
| C8H7N3O2 chapter 2 . 6/9/2011
| AngelCaffrey chapter 6 . 6/7/2011
Awesome story! )
The voices and mannerisms of the characters are spot-on. I love the way your original character(s) actually have some substance - all too often OCs are no more than a name with a hazy link to Neal's past and some need for revenge, haha.
Once again you have left us hanging - so how long till we find out which side Neal chooses? ;)
Kudos to you for getting such an epic completed before the S3 premiere, and thank you for trusting me to beta your baby )
And, one request for the sequel - more scenes at The Diner? ;D
| jayley chapter 6 . 6/6/2011
wow, surprising! but i was like nooo when i got to the end. it's one of those endings that's not an ending, i kinda hate those a little bit, bc ME deciding what happened just isn't the same as knowing what the author intended for the story. it's like that one law&order episode that ends right before they read the verdict!