Reviews for By The Maker, I Will Save Ye
Pie Rat chapter 1 . 4/28/2012
"I imagine that since the demon had taken the form of one of the villagers, that the answer is yes. I've noticed that Hunger Demons tend to set very confusing, elaborate traps," Nathaniel mused, "They're perpetually starving, so they're probably quite unstable."

Is there such a thing as a stable demon, Nathaniel?

:D This was a lot of fun! Great job. As someone who was personally very disheartened at Sebastian's chaste 'romance', I laughed myself sick when he turned down the widow. Damn chantry vows.

But enough rambling! Intangible internet cookies for you.
The Funny Idiot chapter 1 . 6/3/2011
Sebastian is shiny. I like how this fic capitalizes on that. Also, zombies. But mainly, who did shoot that horse? Did the demon possess enough fine motor control over its victims to get them to aim straight? That is pretty impressive, if it did.

Ohhh, wait, I get it. They're sad because Anders went crazy.

He broke up the band! D:

Stupid DA2. Anyway, the only thing this story is missing is moar. Which is always a good sign. Also, also, if I squint I think I can see some Warden/Nathaniel, but that might just be wishful thinking on my part.
Eluvian chapter 1 . 6/3/2011
Concrit:

Your narrative prose is nice and relaxed, but I think it could stand to be a little bit more fluid. The introduction, with Lyna and Nathaniel talking, seems a little bit stilted and abrupt. I don't care for it. But once they actually get to the story itself then things really pick up and the flow gets better. Maybe more description would help?

Also, I keep thinking you should put 'comedy' in the genres somewhere so that people know the title is supposed to be ironic. I will confess, I cringed going in, but I read your other stuff so I figured it probably wasn't what it seemd to be. And I was right! It was funny in context! But there's not really a lot of comedy, so. I don't know. If it were me I would change the title so as not to scare off readers.

Stuff I liked:

"You shame your Maker with such suggestions, Woman," The Free Marcher answered her, "Guard your virtue - and leave me to guard the town."

I could hear him saying this in my head. That's always a good sign.

"I see by your armour that you are a man of the Maker, and we heard you sing the Chant as you came upon us."

My first thought when I read that was that everyone was looking at his unfortunately placed belt buckle of Andraste. Which means that they were all staring at his crotch...

"I imagine that since the demon had taken the form of one of the villagers, that the answer is yes. I've noticed that Hunger Demons tend to set very confusing, elaborate traps," Nathaniel mused, "They're perpetually starving, so they're probably quite unstable."

Ah, there's nothing quite like lampshading the game's own weirdness, is there?

All in all not a bad little piece. I would like to see more like this, I think, with stories of the other Dragon Age charas exploits carrying through the lands and being heard by their fellows. It's an intriguing idea.

Keep it up, hon!