|Reviews for Birthday|
| Moonshimmer Shadow-Phoenix chapter 1 . 7/31/2012
Not bad, it was funny and interesting. Never read a birthday fic for Sebastian before... Love your profile pic of Light, btw! Oh, I was also wondering, what does organismed mean?
| Morticia M chapter 1 . 1/4/2012
Nice. I liked it, except that you misspelled "orgasmed" as "organismed" ;3
| BlueIsMyFavoriteNumber chapter 1 . 11/3/2011
Mmmm yummy... Sadistic Sebastian and Masochistic Ciel... THE PERFECT COMBO! You should write more!
| fumetsu kurenai chapter 1 . 9/16/2011
This was aboslutely...amazing.
Aside from the errors mentioned by others, I was truly intrigued by Sebastian...giggling as his demonic personality was peeked into on his 'birthday'.
Aboslutely hilarious towards the end, and overall just sexy, kay?
Good job. 3
| Taroschain chapter 1 . 8/7/2011
Oh my, that was delicious! Happy Birthday indeed! XD
| LovelyWickedDescet chapter 1 . 6/16/2011
I agree with the other two users. The story was alright, meaning it was quite well written. But you did have a couple of mistakes with grammar.. but nothing that isn't easy to fix. (I'm too tired to point to all of them at the current, I'm also about to get off so this is rushed. If you like me to I would be happy to show)
Ciel was a bit OOC in some areas, but in others he seemed IC also. So some percentage OOC yet a percentage of IC as well.
Sebastian I rather liked.. showing a bit of his demonic side was a nice touch. And I do enjoy a birthday!Sebastian story. I do get tired of seeing most Ciel's (even if they are interesting in their own right).. It was nice. However, Sebastian does not use the word 'sir' for his young master. Bocchan which he uses is 'my lord' or 'young master'.. So in place of that you probably should have used either one.. Sir just makes him sound too old.. (not like the cruddy dub doesn't already ruin his character..)
Detailing was okay.. there was some sort of jag in one area.. but I think that was due to a grammar error.. So I can't be certain (plus as I stated I am tired so it might be playing tricks on me). Dialogue seemed balanced enough...
The story was still very good and I did enjoy it.
(I am sorry if this is short, or sounds a bit rude.. I did say I was tired and that this was rushed a bit. So I apologize) P.S: Are you excitted for chapter 58? Comes out tomorrow...
| promocat chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
happy birthday indeed sebastian!
| blindlesslove chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
It was a very good idea, and over all very well wriiten but i do agree with ChibiKitsuneOfEgypt and their statment about grammer and all that. None the less it was a very good story. Just try to stay away from things like "tears ran down ciels eyes" "sebstian licked the tears away form his eyes"
try to find a better word choice for the second sentance.
| ChibiKitsuneOfEgypt chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
Ok I have two things to say.
1. very nice plot, the thought that Sebastian gets one day free out of a year is a good idea
2. You might want to get a beta. I noticed a few grammatical, spelling, and sentence structure errors that were very obvious and rather distracting. Im not trying to critize or anything I'm just trying to help a fellow writer.
All and all good story, just needs a few tweaks to make it perfect.
| KagamineP.C chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
I bet Sebastain wishes his birthday was everyday... Haha. Very nicely written
| ulqui's-girl chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
Woah! Sebastian fucked him till midnight? Horny little .. XD