|Reviews for The Scars of You|
| Spottedwind19 chapter 1 . 7/21/2011
aww me too dude i feel ur pain
| AccountClosedCept4PMingPhoenix chapter 1 . 6/13/2011
dot dot dot... interesting idea about your life in warrior cats.
| Sextuple Covalent Mo2 Bond chapter 1 . 6/11/2011
There wasn't very much lead-up to any of this. When you're writing a simple fan fiction, it's good measure to (at least) foreshadow some of what you're going to present, especially regarding the main characters. In this case, that's Kestrelheart and Beechfern. Perhaps, in the beginning, it would be better if you shared a little background and history about the two for depth.
I see you put "flashback" in your story before you started the flashback. It would behoove you to use some of your descriptive skills to show your readers that what you are about to write is flashback material. You can even show that it is a flashback in the actual flashback by describing past qualities such as characters at an earlier age than they are now.
This story is more emotionally gripping than logically, and that's what keeps many readers on the edges of their seats. As long as over-emotionalism isn't a problem for you (it doesn't seem to be), then keep using that emotional concept! Good work there. Not a bad story as a whole. Good luck in the future.
Revitalization is Coming!
Order of the Concritters