|Reviews for The Reset Button|
| PancakesAreNotProjectiles chapter 1 . 12/14/2011
This is good, but the lack of proofreading was detrimental to the quality of the story. I would also suggest you learn how to properly format dialogue, it would definitely be beneficial to the quality of your story. As far as content, this is quite good, though somewhat hard to follow towards the end. I gathered that Jane and Deb traded bodies and souls rather than Deb simply inhabited Deb's body, though I'm not sure that's what you were trying to portray. If I were you, I'd clear up the end a bit by using more than just dialogue and using the fact that you wrote from an omniscient point of view to your advantage by giving us a peek at Grayson's thoughts. This is a good start and has potential to become great with a few quick edits. XX
| poetintraining576 chapter 1 . 8/18/2011
Okay, great concept, but you HAVE to separate paragraphs by who's speaking - each time a different character begins to talk, you need a new paragraph. Please keep that in mind as you continue to write; it's rather distracting and un-enjoyable for the reader if you don't.