|Reviews for Continuance|
| Pixelmancer chapter 31 . 5/11
If I had to list everything I love about the way you write Souji/Yukiko, I would be here for the better portion of my day. Let alone the fact that it'd be really tacky for me to describe things that you obviously knew about when you wrote it.
Either way, it's been a great read and I'm sad I got through it so quickly. I feel like I grew attached to the characters all over again, which is the mark of any good story, and ESPECIALLY a Persona fanfiction.
I can't wait for you to get back to writing this story.
| Theralion chapter 28 . 8/11/2017
I realized that I accidentally sent my review before completely expressing my thoughts on the situation with Yu's in-laws, in addition to a few other errors (accidentally putting "Amagis" twice). As such, I'll take the opportunity to expound on my thoughts on the situation between Izumi and the Amagis a bit more.
In order to understand why I believe this situation seems to be a bit at odds with what's been hinted at in the game, let's take a look at the various parties, starting with the Amagis. I've said this before, but in-game, the Amagis seem to encourage Yukiko's romance with Yu(I'll call him this here to differentiate him from Souji, the main character in your fic), teasing her about it and giving her Christmas off, presumably knowing that she'd spend it with Yu. Perhaps they're aware of the other boys who went after Yukiko in the past, but it's possible that they see that Yu is different from them. Even apart from the fact that he helped save her life, Yu and Yukiko share a genuine friendship as Yu helps Yukiko with her various pursuits- most boys who lusted after her wouldn't have bothered. As a result, Ryoko and Katsuhiro's suspicions of Souji are somewhat understandable given the circumstances, but at the same time, they, particularly Katsuhiro, seem a bit too unfavorable and too slow to warm up to him. Considering that Katsuhiro seems to take the worst possible interpretation of every answer Souji gives him, and even the somewhat more reasonable Ryoko is relatively wary of him at first, winning them over isn't an easy task.
Now for the Setas. It's fairly clear that they aren't terribly involved in Yu's life in the game, as Dojima points out that Yu's parents didn't ask him to raise their son's grades, and neither of them so much as hear from either of Yu's parents at any point. As such, it's understandably frustrating for Souji to spend a year away from his parents and then be thrust back under their thumb once he gets home. Perhaps Souji questioning whether his mother has an ulterior motive in visiting her brother and niece is uncharacteristically cynical for the relatively idealistic Yu (particularly considering that most of the good responses for Nanako are to convince her to believe in/sympathize with Dojima), but Izumi's track record gives Souji little reason to think otherwise, given his personality in this fic.
This brings me to my main point. Izumi has gradually had a change of heart and decided to reconnect with her son, even though Souji has more or less given up on her doing so. However, as seen in Chapter 30, that threatens to undo Souji's hard-won progress in winning over the Amagis. Worse, still, if Souji learns that his mother's visit had these consequences, it might also make things worse between mother and son. Perhaps in the long term, things might turn out for the better, but currently, as a result of both parties' personalities going into the meeting, the most probable result is a negative one, worsening relations between Souji and the Amagis, as well as Souji and his mother. Perhaps in stories that include conflict, things often get worse before they get better, but considering the reasons I mentioned before, I have reason to doubt(admittedly, based in large part on my own interpretations of those characters, something I have mentioned before) that things would be this bad.
TL;DR?: It seems as though both sets of parents are, for their child's sake, making things a bit harder for Yu than they should, even if it's not necessarily in character for them to do so. In spite of that, I'm looking forward to seeing how things play out here, once you're ready to get back to this fic.
| Theralion chapter 31 . 7/25/2017
Thank you for your response, even if it came off as a bit of a wall of text (In my experience, not putting enough paragraphs in is one of the easiest mistakes to notice and fix). Now for a few points.
*It's true that Nanako has matured since the events of P4. That said, it's still realistic to have a period in which she's still a bit shy around new people and has to warm up to them. In the game, you'll notice that a lot of the early Social Link ranks have casual small talk, and they only really start sharing their secrets midway through (for example, in Rise's, she only talks about being bullied after getting the letter from a fan).
*Generally, the Investigation Team agrees after capturing Mitsuo, that, as Yukiko puts it, it's fine to feel proud of their accomplishments, but they don't want to tell anyone about it.
*It's reasonable that the Amagis would be concerned about being linked to the Amagis somehow (although I'm not sure what the word to describe one's child's spouse's parent is), although it does seem unfortunate that since Souji has had this much trouble getting them to warm up to him, this development is not only a setback on that regard, but might be one in his mother's efforts to put
*I stand corrected about the university part, since I remember an early passage saying that Souji wanted to go to a university close to Inaba as possible.
*You have a good point about Dojima being intentionally hypocritical. If anything, though, the problem is that Dojima should know better by this point.
Kanji raises an interesting theory about Souji not having a Shadow, but it's impossible for any Persona user to have a Shadow(even if they, like SEES and the Phantom Thieves except for Futaba, didn't get theirs like P4's party did). Since, Souji and Adachi obtained the power of Persona, they no longer have Shadows, which is something Morgana explains in P5 when asked whether the Phantom Thieves have Palaces.
Abuse is more than just physical- as the acronym ESPN goes, there's emotional abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse and neglect. Souji clearly hasn't suffered sexual or physical abuse, and probably hasn't suffered emotional abuse, but his parents are arguably neglectful.
The scene with Yosuke and Rise was OK, although I'm not as enamored with the idea of pairing him up, even though I'm a fan of MC/Yukiko and Kanji/Naoto. In the game, Yosuke was still getting over Saki's death and wasn't open to the idea of getting together with anyone else until he solved the case, even if he occasionally tried to hit on girls. Apart from that, he doesn't have all that good chemistry or ship tease apart from Chie and the protagonist, both of whom are taken.
That's an interesting look at what awaits idols in the future, once the public gets tired of them. It's worth pointing out that in P5 (which, judging from the calendar and the fact that a news story says that Rise is 20, takes place in 2016-17), you can see that Rise and Kanami from Dancing All Night are still releasing singles, so maybe their luck held out for at least the four years from the end of P4 to the start of P5. That said, it's understandable that Rise will have to worry about the future.
Drunk Yukiko is entertaining to see, considering how she acted when she thought she was drunk back on Tatsumi Port Island. Of course, she does seem a little young to be drinking.
It's good to see Izumi taking Yuuma to task, which is possibly my favorite part. Perhaps Yuuma thinks of himself as a "necessary villain," but leaving Souji to fend for himself for long periods of time (e.g. the year he spent in Inaba), while also intervening whenever Souji does something Yuuma doesn't like is hardly good parenting.
It's unfortunate that you're going on hiatus, but if it helps both your fics going forward, that's a good thing. Of course, the longer a fic's on hiatus, the more difficult it is to resume it, which is why many fics never return from hiatus. Whenever I take a break, I tend to do it for a fixed duration- I put one of my projects on hiatus for a month so I could do a Camp NaNoWriMo project I'd been thinking of for a while.
Focusing on one story is a good policy. I generally only have one major project going at once, although I may do shorter stories (less than 50,000 words) or one-shots if I come up with good ideas. I don't know if I've ever had the problem you've had with writing two stories almost the same way, though. The closest thing I can think of is that I have an idea for a post P5 fic that pairs Akira with Makoto, though, but I'm having trouble not having too much overlap with my post-P4 fic, "One Year," and I've ended up using some of my ideas for that in my Akira/Futaba fic, "The Last Promise."
A few other notes.
*Why is there a U in Dojima's last name? I can understand if there might be a bit of confusion as to how to write his name in English(like how you called his nephew Souji instead of Soji), but the localization has an official spelling.
*The Amagi Inn actually seems to do business with Junes, as in one evening shopping event with the Dojimas, you can overhear Yukiko talking with Chie. The fact that Yukiko's wearing her kimono implies she's on inn business.
*I can't really see Souji and Yukiko having sex at this point, since Yukiko's fairly naive when it comes to romantic relationships (in Golden, she doesn't realize why everyone else would assume Yu and the girl who accompanied him into the shed would have sex out there).
*Perhaps it's just me, but Souji seems a little more temperamental than his fairly calm canon self, who only gets visibly angry at the two girls who are badmouthing Saki, and at the team when they're considering throwing Namatame into the TV. Apart from Souji losing his temper at several points, usually involving one or both of his parents, his father says that "he's shortsighted when his blood is up." He's also a bit less forgiving than expected, particularly when he acknowledges to himself that he didn't spare Mitsuo, Namatame or Adachi out of compassion as much out of principle. Both fit the fic that you're writing, but it can be a little jarring seeing Souji act this way compared to how the main character's characterized in the game and spinoffs.
*It's strongly implied Namatame may have played some part in making the sixth dungeon become Heaven. He believed the TV was a safe haven, after the midway point, you start hearing his voice instead of Nanako's, and it's vaguely implied that the Investigation Team briefly thought Kunino-Sagiri was Shadow Namatame (when the Midnight Channel comes on in the hospital room scene, Naoto says Namatame never faced his shadow). It also nicely contrasts with how when Adachi enters the TV while escaping the Investigation Team and waiting for the world to end, his dungeon is the hellish Magatsu Inaba. Still, it's fairly telling that you never see Shadow Nanako at any point.
I'll write another review if I think of anything else. It's sometimes harder to focus on specific details in longer fics (which is why it took me a while to write a review), but I did what I could here.
This was a good chapter, and I'm looking forward to seeing this fic when you're ready to update it again.
| EmD23 chapter 31 . 7/20/2017
My only concern is that a lot of stories which go on hiatus never come out of it. I'm guilty of it myself. It'd be sad for it to happen to a story that's pretty unique within the Persona fanfiction arena.
That being said, I do trust you, so I'll just wait patiently and enjoy CoE in the meanwhile. That one's spiced up quite recently, and it moves at a pretty brisk pace.
P.S. Bless you for that Yosuke x Rise scene. Adorable.
| Ulcaasi chapter 31 . 7/20/2017
AHAHAHAHAA OKAY. Okay. That was weird. I was wondering where my name was in the review responses till I went to check and realised my last review(for some reason) went in as a guest review XD yes. The one on 19th Feb. No idea what happened there.
I really do admire the change she's trying to make and it really is hard but I believe she can do it too. Not many stories out there (that I've seen anyway) that have such drastic change and hardship. At least in the manga department. :P
OH MAAAAAAAN. THE KANJIXNAOTO. HHHHNNNNGGGGHGHHAASDFGHJKLQEURIYPXBSHALDHSKL. I feel satisfied just reading up to that point.
Wait. Wiat wait qait wait wait. Yosuke is taken? Shit. I don't rmr who with. And since when? My brain. Is not working. Agh. The scene with Rise was awesome.
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH. CHIE AND KOU. DAAAAAMN. SO. MUCH. FLUFF. WHY'S THIS CHAPTER HAVE SO. MUCH. FLUFF. ERMAGERD IM DYING.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH. DRUNK YUKIKO. AHAHAHABABAHA JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THIS COULDN'T GET BETTER. OHMAN. I LOVE THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH.
I love the parts with Izumi as well. Seeing her go through the struggle for change is heartening. Also Yumma is an asshole. Well meaning perhaps but still an asshole.
Pretty sure my body's developed some kind of immunity to diabetes after all the time I've spent on this site. But this chapter certainly gave me a run for my money. Favourite os definitely Kanji and Naoto because how can I not choose my OTP. If it wasn't for that I'd have to cheat and say the whole chapter because every part was emotional and amazing and so damn good.
I'm okay with whatever direction you're going right now. Doing things the way you want to is pretty important imo. Your story is one of the best examples I have of me willing to be patient for excellent quality. Maybe it's time for me to start looking at your other fics. I honestly don't know why I haven't. That's not normal for me. Certainly not when I'm reading works as good as yours. I've not played the other Persona games before though. Heck I've never even played Persona 4. I just watched the anime. Atlus games too hard pls nerf.
| Arson Lupine chapter 31 . 7/20/2017
Okay. Thank you for alerting us to this fact. Do your best. I hope your writing goes well.
| Anime obsessed fan chapter 31 . 7/20/2017
Yay, new chapter! *reads post script* Oh, hiatus. Oh well, whatever works out better for you is the most important thing. Good luck with the hiatus, I hope to read more Continuance eventually (probably a good time for me to get around to reading CoE). And a P5 fic huh? Wonder what plot/couple that will have. The title makes me think of someone, but she's not a love interest in-game (although there are some unused lines) and my guess is probably way-off.
I thought some previous chapters had been really sweet, but wow this one was up to 11. Wonderful to check in on all the couples (except for Yosuke's case, unless...?) and the plots. My favorite bit was probably the Souji section, for someone talking some sense into him and him accepting it, took him long enough, but he did take it pretty well, that sounds like a post-game mature protagonist (though the P4 protagonist was always close to perfect anyway). And I guess Yukiko's alcohol tolerance has improved a bit? Good thing she didn't blurt out too much. My other favorite was probably the Yosuke and Rise part, as they're two of my other favorite characters from P4 (and Yosuke was more careful to avoid another King's Game). Yosuke's little stunt was funny and the humor was balanced out by them pondering their own futures.
Even with all those happy moments, I think Naoto might have a new full-time job in keeping Izumi from digging too deeply into anything, especially with Teddie around. Not to mention whatever Yuuma is up to (how bad were his parents?!). At least it makes him a deeper character rather than just mean father (and Souji inherited more from him than he'd ever admit).
Thank you for another awesome chapter. I'm happy you checked in on all the plots and sub-plots one more time before the long break. And no cliffhanger, thankfully. I look forward to more chapters whenever your schedule allows and hope the hiatus works out for you. I might as well go reread this fic (or start your other fic).
| zainethedemonking chapter 31 . 7/20/2017
After the scene with Yukiko drunk, I can't get the idea of Yumma coming to Inaba to make trouble and her getting so mad at him she lights stuff on fire by accident out of my head.
Or maybe Teddie could just freeze him solid, him not being human does have its advantages.
| Zelenal chapter 31 . 7/19/2017
Excellent chapter, even if it IS the middle of July.
I absolutely love what you're doing with Rise and Yosuke. Watching them slowly grow closer has been great and, when they finally get together (because that's totally what you're building towards), it's going to be amazing. Of course, there are two really large hurdles to get over (Rise's infatuation with Souji and her contractual obligation to remain single) but I'm sure they can get over them. It'll certainly be fascinating to watch.
The bit with Izumi and Doujima's little contest was also great. It was perhaps the most anime thing in this fic so far and, if we happen to see that rematch, I'd love to see it go as over-the-top as is feasibly possible. I'm talking about "I'll take this potato chip... AND EAT IT!" levels of overblown epicness.
I get the feeling that a divorce is not entirely out of the question. If Yuuma remains the same as Izumi becomes more and more human, that might be the only way for them to get a remotely happy ending. It'd be a huge downer, to be sure, but sometimes that's the way life is.
It sucks that the new chapter comes with the news that the story is going on hiatus for an indefinite period of time. That being said, I fully understand why you're doing this. Your reasoning is sound (I've actually read two stories from a different author where the author bounces back and forth between the two and there are times where a line from one can be found almost word-for-word in the other or scenes are suspiciously similar). Of course, it doesn't help matters that your P3 fic is presumably highly similar in nature to this one. If you were writing a second story that was very different, this likely wouldn't be much of an issue.
In regards to your P5 fic, I can't say I'm looking forward to it. I still haven't played P3 and I don't even own anything that P5 is on.
There's a lot more I could comment on with this chapter but it'd be a lot of the same. "I thought this was cute/funny" and whatnot. So I guess I'll see you next time, whenever that next time may be.
| jujihanji chapter 31 . 7/19/2017
i am so happy about this update, i love this story and thank you very much for the continuance
| Originaljuan92 chapter 30 . 4/1/2017
Glad to see you again. I absolutely love Izumi vs everyone. As a matter a fact I can't to see Souji dad get in on all this. I want to see how everyone deals with him. Soujis family dynamics is what keeps bringing me back. Also Nanako is just a joy to read.
Can't wait for the next chapter. Have fun writing.
| jack the writer chapter 30 . 3/28/2017
My goodness it has been a while, I hope that you've been well.
I must say that this chapter came as a real surprise... and WHAT A WELCOME SURPRISE INDEED! A Valentine's Day gift, truly you're timing is impeccable. This was also a much needed 100% Izumi chapter.
Another stellar piece, I really think that you've come a long way in your craft. Once more I will bare my thoughts as they occurred sequentially throughout the chapter. For one I loved the initial thoughts of Izumi as she made her 'pilgrimage' back to Inaba, sort of following in the footsteps of her son, and being a fish out of water despite it supposed to be her native turf. I will say early on that I appreciate Izumi's mindset. She is a strong yet flawed character, she has her regrets but refuses to let them hinder her, knowing that there is little to nothing she can do despite move forward. It is a quality I entirely approve of and something that many of us, including myself would benefit from taking to heart.
Once more I must say that Nanako gives me goosebumps with how adorable and altruistic she can be, if she inherited these qualities from Chisato, then Dojima must've been the luckiest man in world to have courted her (which makes me wish for a Ryotaro x Chisato fanfic but owell).
Having Izumi explore Inaba was an refreshing experience. From the side-quests, the interactions and the story of Persona 4 it is easy to imagine Souji becoming somewhat of a local celebrity/hero, especially with the additive factor of the many deeds he did to help his small community. One thing that I would have loved to read would have been Izumi reacting to the other amenities that Inaba has to offer, such as Daidara's and Aiya's. Nevertheless, you set the atmosphere just fine for the encounter with Naoki.
Naoto and Kanji remain another strong couple, it was brilliant for Kanji to show his reverance towards Souji before his senpai's mother. I was glad that it gave her an additional aspect of how much he means to them.
The meeting with the Amagi's may be my favourite part of this chapter. It was a true battle of wit and I could really feel the tension from the words. Katsuhiro may be a gruff man who is hard to please but the true mastermind is of course Ryoko, you established the strength in her presence and her authority rather well, I can't wait to read more of her being amazing.
The Dojima fight was some much needed clarity. They're siblings so they've been in the ring more than once before. This section provided some much needed catharsis as I've been waiting oh so long for them to come clear with eachother. It was a good resolution to the constant aversion to confrontation.
Also Nanako is generally amazing, anything Nanako is highly appreciated, wanted and needed.
Thank you as always! Writing to such a standard must be taxing but I thank you once more for your constant hard work. It's truly a pleasure to read each chapter as they are released and well worth the wait indeed no matter the length in time. I hope that 2017 treats you well and would like to ask the personal question of if you are looking forward to Persona 5? Having played the Japanese release I can tell you with utmost confidence that it is a formidable addition to the Persona series and a game well worth picking up.
(sorry for the late review, this has been stuck on halfway finished for a while. Thanks again for your hard work and I hope have a good one.)
| Kyral chapter 30 . 2/28/2017
Sorry for the late review!
First off, no one, and I mean *no one* can resist the adorable ball of happiness and light that is Nanako. One thought that floated into my head as I read this chapter is that someone should find a way to weaponize her happiness.
So this chapter is basically "Izumi goes to Inaba" and I love it. This was going to be the journey that would make or break Izumi's redemption arc. Inaba had a profound effect on Souji and it's time that Izumi realized that. Izumi was right, it's a good thing that Souji didn't talk about his parents at all while he was there. I reckon the reception she got from Naoto and (especially) Kanji would have been much different had he let his feelings about his parents be known. I suspect that Naoto isn't accepting of Izumi just yet anyway. She was friendly and open minded, but I got the feeling she was constantly appraising her, trying to figure out just what was going on. On the other hand, Izumi's observations of Naoto and Kanji were interesting and cute (as almost anything involving those two).
Since you called it out, Izumi vs the Amagis. I really think that Izumi was close to completely undoing everything that Souji had built up regarding Yukiko's parents. The Amagis seem both protective of their daughter (as shown when they grilled Souji) and big on family. Izumi was really close to blowing it on the latter. Though the battle of wills was fascinating to read. Once again Ryoko invokes the phrase "silk hiding steel". Katsushiro is the immediate threat, but it's Ryoko that you *really* have to pay attention to. Going to be interesting seeing how they interact in the future.
This leads into Doujima vs Izumi. Now we see that Doujima is more pissed off at his sister than he let on. While he encouraged Souji earlier to try and talk to his mother, it's clear that he still has his own issues. I can also imagine Doujima considering Souji his own son on some levels. The comparison between Doujima and Nanako's relationship pre-Souji and the relationship that Souji has with his parents is interesting. Maybe thats why Doujima is so pissed off at Izumi at the start? He realizes that if not for Souji that he could have wound up in the same situation with Nanako? I'm glad to see that brother and sister are trying to reconcile for now. However the stakes are a little higher with Ryo now. Nanako has met and *likes* her Auntie Izumi. If Izumi fails her promises to Nanako, her bond with Doujima will be shattered and reversed (to use the game's own terms).
There is one thread that is winding its way through the chapter and I don't know if it's intentional or not, but it's piqued my curiosity. Izumi this entire chapter, from the moment she met Naoki, has been banging up against the edges of what happened with Souji and the murders during his time in Inaba. Even earlier than this she has seen the effects that the year had on him (one could argue that these effects set her on this path). Now people like Doujima may be content to just handwave their explanations to avoid disclosing their powers, but I somehow don't think Izumi will be satisfied. Be it her (reawakening?) maternal instincts or her sheer curiosity, those murders will be on her mind. Actually I was a little nervous that she would find something relating to Personas or the Midnight Channel in Souji's room. I wonder, will Izumi learn the truth of that year? That will be an interesting conversation to be sure.
Speaking of conversations, how is Souji going to take the news that his mother has been making friends in Inaba? He's still *incredibly* protective of the family he has made there and despite opening talks with his mother, I can't see him being alright with his mother snooping (in his mind) around. Then again, Souji doesn't know what we know, that his mother is legitimately trying here.
It's good to see Izumi trying here. I mentioned that Inaba had a profound effect on Souji, changed him for the better. It looks like it's having the same effect on Izumi. Being around Nanako doesn't hurt either. All in all, great chapter. It's nice to return to Inaba once in a while, seeing as I've largely moved on from the P4 fandom, but this story keeps me coming back :)
Til next time, cheers!
| Cyklos chapter 30 . 2/21/2017
Wow, my favorite post-game fanfic is back!
I'm really happy that the whole chapter is dedicated to Izumis Inaba-visit. Her character arc and redemption is one of my favorite things about this story. It's enoyable to follow a character that learns about the characters and the story of the game through a fresh pair of eyes. Hope she meets the rest of the investigation team (teddy will be interesting). Favorite part... Naoto and Kanji, and the fox.(Nananko of course wins, but she is cheating. To cute.)
I know that there are a lot of characters to juggle but I really like Megumi & Yoshiro, well written OCs, and it feels like they have been a bit delegated to the backseat now that the old gang's mostly back together. Really liked them back when Souji was in Kofu.
Hope the next chapter comes soon!
| Guest chapter 30 . 2/19/2017
I suppose after a few years on this website, with rugs constantly being pulled out from underneath you, one tends to get a little more... guarded :P Or perhaps "prepared" would be a better word. Taking hits from heartbreak bombs is a little easier if your heart is already braced for it XD
I did mention that everything seems too good to be true, so my inner mind is wrestling with disbelief and being all skeptical about it.
Welp be ready for a review that's gonna sound like a raving madman because it's going to be updated as I read through the chapter :D
Nanako is extremely cute. HOW DOES ANYONE NOT LIKE HER. OH MY GOSH. SHE'S ADORABLE AND I LOVE HER. KANJI AND NAOTO TOO. WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. THOSE TWO ARE SUPER CUTE AS WELL. LOVE THEM. Haven't read much Kanji/Naoto recently so it's nice to see them again :3
Izumi vs the world more like, with all the crap she's going through. But I'm glad she's changing and is sincere about it. Between the Amagis and Doujima I think her against the Amagis was much more interesting and entertaining while with Doujima it felt closer to home and a long time coming. I think they both needed that one.