Reviews for Hachin
Knyle Borealis chapter 17 . 2/8
Wow. Now I see why you have so many reviews. Well Done!
TsukiNoBara chapter 17 . 2/5
Thank you for this amazing read. I nearly drained my phone's battery just so I could keep reading this story while I was traveling today.

I wish I could be more specific about what I liked about it, but my brain isn't really cooperating with me.

Except for one thing: you did a really good job of handling Mushu. I don't read much in the Mulan fandom, but the few stories I read that did feature him didn't do it right. I can't say what they did wrong. I just know that you did it right. And you even managed to get Cri-kee in there! So, yeah, definitely a good job with those two.

Good job with everything else, too. But I wanted to praise you on them in particular because they seem like difficult characters to work with.
TsukiNoBara chapter 9 . 2/4
"I see. So the man who would massacre entire villages, without quarter or captive, razes provinces, and with every intent of doing so to all of China… draws a personal line at rape."

Now, see, that line right there is an excellent illustration of the "Even Evil Has Standards" trope.

Also, the way it's phrased amuses me.
TsukiNoBara chapter 4 . 2/3
Okay, I'm not sure if maybe no one bothered to correct you until now, or if you just never got around to correcting it, but Yoa's name is actually spelled "Yao."

(I am enjoying this so far, but this has been bugging me, because I pronounce "Yoa" differently in my head, and it takes me out of the story for just a second as I try to figure out who that is, before remembering that you're talking about Yao.)
Sieben Nightwing chapter 17 . 10/26/2014
I'm pleased that you have a sequel in mind. I'm looking forward to seeing them, especially the main sequel and the three-shot. Best of fortunes and hope you get them out soon.
Quart de Lune chapter 17 . 10/13/2014
Oh wow !
I never really thought about Disney fanfiction cause, as much as I love those movies, this is so not what I usually like to read. But I re-watched Mulan Saturday night and I was wondering what people would write about this.
I wasn't looking for anything in particular, but mostly I found very very short stories about Mulan and Shang that seemed dreadfully cheesy... and then I found this!
A long story with adventure, drama, Shan-yu and a captive Mulan ? Instantly hooked !
So I begin to read, and I read, and I read and I just couldn't stop ! Which happens with most of the stuff I read, but usually I do go to bed before 4 a.m
Anyway, all that to say, it was incredible. The world you created with Jazzqueen was complex and fascinating, the characters had a story and a personality of their own, your Mulan stayed true to herself and grew in a way I could never have imagined.
So I had a wonderful time for which I thank you, and I can't wait to read more of it )
Illishar chapter 17 . 9/11/2014
Okay, this was pretty much the best story ever, and I almost literally couldn't stop reading it until it was done. SO AWESOME! You are a fantastic writer (please tell me you're published somewhere so I can read more than fan fiction) and a great world builder, wonderful details, wonderful characters. Yeah. Amazingly awesome. Thank you so much for writing it - it's exactly the kind of story I was hoping to find on Mulan!
BittersweetSparrow chapter 17 . 9/8/2014
On a whim I decided I needed to read something with this unusual duo as the focus - don't ask why, I couldn't tell you if you did. Just one of those sudden cravings we all get, I suppose. Obviously the pickings are beyond slim, but imagine my astounded wonder when I found this story! I expected a pleasing romp (probably left unfinished, like so many fics that are written over several years or started long ago) that would do a little to soothe the itch, if nothing that would really do to quench it.

In two words? My. God.

I have never, never been so overwhelmingly surprised and pleased as I was with this. It was well-written, the personifications DELIGHTFUL. I could imagine the characters in my head perfectly going about what was written on the screen, and don't even get me started on the world building. If i were a man I'd probably have an amazing historical-fantasy-fiction hard on, and I apologize for the crassness of that image - but I mean it. I LIVE for fics like this, and I want to both thank and congratulate you on it. I will be immediately devouring the three-shot, and probably checking my inbox every day for news of any eventual prequel/sequel happenings, because I don't think I couldn't follow you even if I wanted to not.

Well done all around; I honestly did not expect to find what has probably taken an easy place in my top three fanfictions of all time in a random, curious peek into this corner of the world. Well done indeed!
HopefullyNot chapter 17 . 8/21/2014
Niiiice. Good work! Keep it up.
Guest chapter 8 . 7/29/2014
Your logic for this fanfic is driven by the plot you desire and not by characterization. This is evident through Mulan's irrational thoughts, which is just out of character for her. Her biggest attribute is her cunning, it allowed her to succeed in her army training, defeat the Hun army, save her commander and to eventually defeat Shan Yu. Her tenacity and bravery pushed her to take the place of her father in the army and win the respect of her fellow soldiers and commander. Once you have her lose to Shan Yu in the river both of these characteristics of hers are greatly dimmed and your logic for it, surviving to "preserve her father's line," doesn't excuse the change in her character. She schemed to escape at the wall, but was denied the chance and her spirit was so crushed by going over she no longer has ANY ambitions to escape her captors. I thought it made sense while on the move with warriors and wounded and on foot that she couldn't attempt to leave, but slowly she's stopped thinking about escape, even when reminded of her subjugation, confinement, and given the opportunity to escape. Where is her fighting spirit? She would go against a whole army, the hun and chinese both, the policies of her nation and society, but she wouldn't risk escape when given the chance? I think you're not giving her enough credit. For one, when she ran the horse race it was the PERFECT opportunity for escape. The first instance she had come into contact with a horse and all she wants to do is win a little race? What better way to prove herself as a horseman than to break out of the corral to her freedom. She would have a head start on all her captors and be on an unclaimed horse and Shan Yu is way up the hill getting betrothed to her in a sacred meeting, all his watchers are scattered. Most wouldn't realise she was making a break for it before she was gone and she wouldn't have to fear punishment unless they caught her first and if they did, she was fit and healed by that time. Shan Yu wouldn't defeat her in her prime, especially not surrounded by possible weapons - she defeated him with a fan and fireworks before! With agility and quick wit. And if Shan Yu were to capture her again and beat her it would make an all the more exciting moment with their betrothal. What irks me the most about this past chapter though, despite Mulan apparently giving up on escape, and getting swept up in being a slave so she doesn't die so she can live to have children in repayment of her father (which is screwed up reasoning, because hen she went int o the army she would have done a great dishonor to her family if she was discovered, but she did it anyway because she wanted her father to live because she loved him, risking his family line ending with her death at the same time so it seems she doesn't care so much for her own well-being or her future children or her father's grandchildren. besides what good are grandchildren her father will never meet, or that are half hun?) She goes through with the stupid wedding but says she can't return to her father without her maidenhead? So what she's still thinking about escaping? But she doesn't realize that the best way to escape with her virginity intact is not to get married and she still won't run away from her wedding? You're more interested in showing us Shan Yu's world and how they would view his Han slave than Mulan taken captive by them. All the mystery behind Mulan being this bright sun and catalyst is lost when she acts like a meek woman, full of plotting and inaction. That's the greatest disappointment of this story. I love that you created a Hun world, that you tried to make it historically accurate and gave life to the characters and community, I don't mind hearing Shan Yu's back story or giving him integrity. I can't abide by Mulan's change of character. She wouldn't ever stop fighting, she wouldn't give up on her freedom and she wouldn't give into the will of others, especially not murderers who would raze her country. She's a soldier, a warrior of her country and she wouldn't willfully abide by Shan Yu's rule or be taken in by his people because she isn't a Hun. Her affection for them wouldn't change her resole to leave them, it didn't change her resolve to abandon her family and endanger her life and she has no squabbles with endangering herself for her goals.
The King in White chapter 17 . 7/12/2014
I wasn't sure how it would end right until the very end. Well done!
albaloo chapter 17 . 5/23/2014
Wonderful story! I really enjoyed reading it and look forward to your other stories!
Guest chapter 17 . 5/15/2014
nice story! All the characters were v. real. brought life to a one dimensional villain.
ForgottenTales chapter 17 . 5/10/2014
It's fics like yours that complete spoil me for others. I absolutely love plot divergences that further expands the cannon universe to something that is more complex, mature and well-thought out. Hitchups by The Antic Repartee was one such story. From the moment I read your synopsis, I was immediately struck by excitement, and the actual story certainly did not disappoint! Mulan as both a woman and a soldier was very relatable and as I followed her story, I could not help but genuinely root for her. I especially liked how the story gradually changed Mulan's escape plan into thriving in her environment and making the best of her circumstances. Even though I could still feel the pangs of longing for Mulan to return to her homeland, to her parents, at the same time, I could relate to her decision to stay on with the Huns. Speaking of the Huns, it was just inspiring how you've managed to build a world extending beyond China and its tropes. The characters, culture and the settings, all very well planned and written. I was surprised to find myself liking Bataar, and reconciling this perspective of him to the image of the terrifying Disney villain I remembered. It gave me a different view on what as a child I interpreted as black and white. While this seems to be more historical fiction, your incorporation of shamans and spirit guardians did not detract from the story at all. In fact I would have loved to find out more about Modu and the other spirit guardians Huns have and if they differ from Hans, ie, different powers, hierarchy etc.
jesse chapter 17 . 3/31/2014
that was a pretty good fucking story, kept me riveted to my computer screen for over 7 or 8 hours reading it all. very well done, could picture most of the scenes in my head in the same style as the movie itself. good plot with clear progression, intriguing characters, and a good overall concept. 3 hairy thumbs up.
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