Reviews for Mass Effect: Break the Cycle
Guest chapter 9 . 12/18/2014
I was surprised that you mentioned Nirali Bhatia a lot but still killed her off
Theralion chapter 9 . 3/11/2014
The fic has quite an ambitious concept, especially in its intent to cover the entire trilogy. Much of what it's covered already seems to be from the game, which makes the flow of the text largely predictable at times. Of course, the story's just before Tali joins, much less Liara,so neither of their relationships with Shepard have yet come into play, meaning that significant plot elements have yet to come into play in this fic. I'd be interested in seeing how you approach them, and how you deal with the Shepard/Liara breakup.

It seems you're going with a Sole Survivor Shepard. I wonder if you'll follow up on the deaths of Sole Survivor Shepard's squad more than it was in the actual game (I went with a War Hero Spacer Shepard). It might be interesting to see where Shepard ends up as far as alignment goes (since this is before most of the alignment decisions with consequences), although the reaction to Garrus' shot on the person holding Dr. Michel hostage seems to indicate Paragon.

It's interesting seeing some more screentime on characters who weren't shown much, especially Nihlus, a character who could have used more development (and to some extent, still could in this fic).

It was also good to see some more about Tali, and the less than perfect relationship she has with her father. The poem Ashley thought of as she thought she was about to die against the geth (as another reviewer said, I've seen most race names in Mass Effect in lowercase letters) on Eden Prime is a nice touch. Small details of that sort help in making your characters come to life.

There are some proofreading errors, such as "Rouge Angles of Satin" ("baited breath" when it should be "bated"), word agreement ("the absolute worse bounty hunters" when it should be "worst"), word choice (I'm not sure "prude" is the right word to describe someone who stares at dancers- it would be more appropriate for Ashley complaining about them) and sometimes missing commas.

I'm interested in seeing where it goes from here.
1054SS325MP chapter 9 . 5/17/2013
So, you're not updating this anymore? Too bad. This was a good read.
strangebloke chapter 9 . 5/2/2013
Good story, although the parts where we're following the main cast are somewhat boring as we know every single thing that they're going to say.

I really love the more original parts, though, like Tali's dealings with the fleet before leaving and the details of Garrus' C-sec investigation. I guess I'd like to see more from that angle.
justanotherguy chapter 9 . 12/26/2012
Great story. Can't wait for your next chapter.
A2C2G chapter 1 . 12/10/2012
Keeeeeeeeeeep
Writing

This story, that is.
silverarrow82 chapter 1 . 11/28/2012
I love it so far. I really hope to see more of it soon.
Stellar Magic chapter 8 . 11/28/2012
lol... I tend to misspell the first name on occasion but apparently the official spelling is Kaidan Alenko, so... what can I say: Alenko is the correct spelling of his last name.
John Therion chapter 8 . 11/28/2012
Typing on the phone, so this will be short. But in short, stellar story and I love how you started it two months prior. However, the constant misspelled Kaidan Alanko's name is driving me slowly crazy. :-P
It's back chapter 8 . 11/27/2012
I thought for sure this was dead. Glad to see it's not!

Actually, it kind of inspires me to go finish up my own story XD

Keep up the great work.
Hivedragon chapter 13 . 6/17/2012
I'm loving this story, the joke moments are gold and the going to one person story to the other is great, looking forward to more.
SmilingJack65 chapter 8 . 9/23/2011
Nice chapter, I really like how you've got all these different scenes set up. It's interesting reading a story that starts before the beginning of a game and all of it so far has made great sense to lead up to the events of ME1.

Query. I read how you borrowed the Quarian culture that Calinstel set up, so I was wondering what is a "gen'ro'sa?" Calinstel always puts definitions at the end of his chapters for any word he may have used during said chapter. He does this even if he has listed it before and it really is quite helpful. I would suggest you pick up the same habit if using the native Quarian language becomes a frequent thing, it will save you a lot of "What's this mean?" reviews.
Mario chapter 13 . 8/16/2011
The story is really picking up. Keep up the good work.
Mario chapter 13 . 8/16/2011
The story is really picking up. Keep up the good work.
Tangyman chapter 13 . 8/4/2011
Very good so far. I like the mini plot with Razi and Krenare as well as the way you seamlessly fill in bits of the plots not covered in the game,
52 | Page 1 2 3 .. Last Next »