|Reviews for Old Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Zoku: Kurushihen|
| beaniek4 chapter 9 . 6/17/2012
This was a really good story! I wish you'd continue it, though... XD
| Lightning Catastrophe chapter 9 . 1/3/2012
Update please! l love this so far (even Tetsuya a tinytinytinytinytiny almost non existent microscopic bit). Everyone's perfectly in character and l see no spelling errors. Update soon? :)
| Titan83 chapter 9 . 12/15/2011
I think you have done really well with this fanfic. You have actualy made it like the anime and manga where bad things happen and you have actualy kept the characters personality similar to the anime and manga.I have read other higurashi fanfics and the ones that have Keiichi and mion together turns them into mushy lovers which i woudnt think would happen between them even if they were even to start going out, i would have expected there character personalities to be the same. The only thing i thought went a little left feild was when mion asked keiichi if she was sexy, i wouldnt have expected her to do that, But that can also be used later in the story too.
So all in all i give this fanfic a 5 outta 5, keep up the good work.
| The Minister of Silly Walks chapter 9 . 10/20/2011
I...won't spoil anything...So to avoid spoiling anything, I'm going to skirt around the bit where I speculate for coming chapters and just comment on what we got right here.
This chapter was quite nice :3 There was a nice variety of drama and comedy (I particularly liked the comedy...gotta enjoy it while I can, y'know) My favorite part had to be Keiichi's faux pas with the curry D and then the resulting vengeance from my favorite blue haired teacher. I chortled when she backed away and Keiichi let his guard down only to get nailed with chalk. Hilarious~ Though at the same time, Chie really pissed me off in this chapter. To you, it should be no mystery as to why she angered me so w Though I do have an inquiry...you and I both know that Tetsuya in the future is going to [spoilas spoilas spoilas] so clearly his etiquette in class doesn't really get any better over time. So if Chie could threaten Mion with expulsion for just threatening Tetsuya, shouldn't he too get expelled early on? I mean, for some reason I don't really picture him apologizing to Satoko and similarly I can see him going in to Chie's office to get scolded for hurting Satoko and treating her with the utmost disrespect. Chie, I implore you, kick his fanny out of your fine establishment! O_O
Oh and I found two things wrong with this chapter o3o
Regarding Hanyuu and Tetsuya's not so good relationship: "...a mock thrown at her for her horns." In English, one really wouldn't use the word "mock" like this. It's mainly used as a verb or as an adjective. I believe it's technically correct to use mock in this way since it is also a noun, but its kind of one of those unwritten laws about the English language. It sounds a little strange and it kind of threw me off a bit when I was reading :B
Regarding Shion's thoughts on Mion and Tetsuya's relationship: "It was so easy to imagine them fight that it was almost scary..." Here I think "fight" should be "fighting".
And that's all I found that was wrong with this chapter 8D yaay! Oh I also love the kind of character your making Satoko into. She has a lot of potential to be a really interesting member of the Kurushi-hen cast you've got here. Her ability to read Mion the way she did in that rock-paper-scissors dual they had is remarkable owo I hope to see more of that amazing talent.
And that's all I really have to say about this chapter _ Oh..there is just one more thing...
RENNNNAAAA! ;_; -sobs- Wake up, man! Oh! _ I forgot to mention the way you have her slip into unconsciousness is brilliant. "She never even felt the commotion with the ground when her legs had given way under her." Q_Q hauu...
TTFN - Ta, Ta For Now
| Michael S. Repton chapter 9 . 10/20/2011
Contrary to Crimso, I'm going to cast my vote for Rena being dead, or possibly the others will find her before the actual moment of death, but either way I think she's gone. The italic part before the chapter title does rather imply it. (And "how suddenly a life can end" is one of my own favourite themes.)
Moving on... hmm, not very much to say about this chapter that's not obvious. Tetsuya is an absolute cad, and I did like the tension created from the club members' powerlessness to deal with him. (That sort of situation where you can't escape and someone is gaining more and more control over you makes for really great drama - one reason why I love Order of the Phoenix so much, but that's a digression.) Then, the banter about Keiichi staying over was a nice little tension-reliever. (There's a small slip in this scene, though: "their teacher approached them, standing behind the boy". "Standing" would imply not moving, which doesn't fit with "approached".)
I think the tag game would work better if you described it in more detail rather than just summarised. Since FFNet makes us constantly aware of how much (or in this case little) of the chapter remains, the brevity made it obvious you were hurrying on to a sudden happening, and that rather took away from its impact. However, the description of Rena's attack was excellent - very fine emotional writing - and more than made up for that. (Just one small point: after you've started referring to Rena as "she" and "her", it's odd to see one sentence begin with "the girl". The pronouns imply that we know who you're talking about; so if anything, "the girl" makes us momentarily think you must mean someone other than Rena.)
"Commotion" in the last sentence is incorrect. It means disturbance, hubbub. I would guess you meant "connection".
Overall, another excellent chapter and I can't wait for more!
| Crimso chapter 9 . 10/20/2011
You know what's funny? I was originally going to title the last chapter I uploaded of BFB "Tag, You're It," as well. ...I changed it to Sunset at the last minute, though. Of course, the chapter also involved a game of tag.
Moving on from that topic, I suppose I have to keep talking about Tetsuya now, yes? Well I suppose my opinion of him didn't change from the last chapter. Perhaps he originally wanted to join the club, but is now holding a grudge against them. If that was the case, then having him join in the first place would have been the best idea. Well... they wouldn't have known that, so I suppose not. I guess it's a situation where they can't win, huh? Well, who knows. He may have not cared in the first place. He probably only wanted to join, if he did at all, to get closer to Mion and all that. So he could... argh. That guy... I don't like him at all ;3;. I'm sure you know that by now, though. I don't really have much to say about him, except my predictions have not changed. Chie, as the teacher, is probably just seeing the good side of him that he uses to mask his true self. No one wants to act like their mean or perverted or anything bad around a teacher, after all. I don't know what my teacher would think if me if they found out I read Higurashi...
And yay, tag games! But I guess in this case, it's not a good thing. I knew from the title and the author's note that someone would get hurt from the game, pretty badly hurt, that is. ...Man, I wonder what happened to Rena? The scene with her passing out just seemed a little... random, to me, but I suppose it's fine in this case since we're probably going to get an explanation. I hope that Rena didn't, you know, die. She's probably pretty badly hurt or something, but I doubt she died. I wonder why she passed out though, I wonder? (Haha...). It may just be something with her body. You know, just a medical condition or something, or someone could have slipped something into her food. Tetsuya is the obvious conclusion, but was it really someone who slipped something into her food?
Great chapter, as usual, and I can't wait to see what happens next. Please continue to take your time.
| The Minister of Silly Walks chapter 8 . 9/30/2011
Give me a moment while I mourn the happiness ;_;. ... Okay...now that that's done, it is time for a review!
I liked this chapter quite a lot o3o There was certainly more action in it than the others when Mion was confronting Tetsuya and even all though I would say all the other scenes in this chapter were "calm", I still would say that there wasn't a dull moment in this chapter nor has there really been a dull moment at all in Kurushi-hen. Everything flows so well, it's easy to read and all of it very entertaining. I also love your sense of humor x] Mion's perverted little "banana" joke amused me a great deal! Ho ho ho ho ho! (random Santa Clause laughter!)And Mion and Shion seem to just love passing perverted jokes between each other and they're damn good at it xD They make a pretty solid comedy duo when I think about it. And I had to send my heart out to Kei-chan when Mion painted him into a corner with that evil question of hers x3 "You think I'm sexy, don't you? ;D Admit it!"
I probably just would have blushed and fell quiet x] Cuz really I don't like that word "sexy". I mean it's fun to use jokingly like Mion was, but like Keiichi I could never call a girl I liked (even as a friend) sexy unless I made it clear I was joking. I feel it's degrading :/ But hey, I'm not a girl XDD I'm sure some of them would just love to be called that all day long. Fortunately, Mion doesn't strike me as the type. Still I can understand why it hurt her when Keiichi was all like "/_/ I-I'm not saying you're sexy." While I think I can get why he refused to say that, to Mion, it clearly just looked like Keiichi didn't find her at all attractive. Which is why no guy in Keiichi's situation can win because either way you sound like a jackass D
Moving on to something slightly more important though~
Tetsuya..._ I knew I didn't like him. And he's just going to get so, so much worse isn't he? I mean, I knew he was bad, but beating up on a kid like that? Who the hell does that? ! Oh but on that note I did love the psychology you put in to the scene where Keiichi and Mion find Satoko crying! You said something about how the complexity of Satoko's traps is directly related to her own level of happiness. I can see that as being totally true. The more complex her traps, the more confident she is she can pull them off successfully without actually hurting anyone. So it seriously broke my heart when you mentioned how her traps have been becoming more and more lax as of late. . It really pisses me off when the villain of a story comes in and ruins small things like that for the characters! It's like they're going out of their way to painstakingly destroy the heroes' life bit by bit! God, please let SOMEBODY hurt hurt boy! I want to see some blood from that one! 3 Truck loads of the stuff! ! !
And now onto the 2nd ACT of this chapter~
I liked this part. It was one of those "Nothing of all that much consequence happens yet this is still fun to read 8D" bits (yes, I know that's a mouthful x3) There were just two things here I wanted to point out to you:
"Was that the same as a promise you would continue your perversion?" This line just kinda flew over my head. I didn't quite get what Mion was trying to say x] Of course I might just be slow :b And you know me, Cherry, that's not an unlikely possibility. This second point, however, I'm more sure of.
"his serious tone not to be taken fun of." This is, as you know, referring to Saburo-I mean Myoo!-in this chapter when he was shooting down Mion's proposition for Keiichi to come and spend the night with her. The phrase "taken fun of" is...well I'm not sure how I'd describe it but it doesn't really feel natural x3 What most people would say is: "...his serious tone not to be taken light of," or, "...taken lightly." That's just meh suggestion though. Use that information however you wish ;D
And ehhhhhhh... D to be honest...as the older brother of 6 younger sisters...I can kinda see where Saburo...I mean Myoo (DAMNIT!) is coming from here. I mean, yeah, his fear is totally irrational, though completely understandable. Thing is though, I think Myoo eventually started to become more concerned with being right than with protecting his daughter xD Because towards the end Mion was making sense with her argument. And really, if I were Myoo, I probably would let KEIICHI sleep in the same room as my daughter. I mean _ they saved Hinamizawa together. They all nearly died together. That's something worth considering ;3
Anyway, great chapter, Cherry! 8D There are just a few small English quirks you gotta be on the lookout for. Other than that, though, I found this chapter to have nice flow that made it very easy to read as well as being generally fun all over with the new conflict between Mion and Tetsuya and all the witty (and perverted) banter between the characters! Good job :'D...I'll be missing this happiness stuff though ;_;
TTFN - Ta, Ta For Now
| Crimso chapter 8 . 9/29/2011
Wow, another awesome chapter from you! I know you say not much happened, but it still was a great chapter. I don't mind filler chapters, as long as it's a chapter, I'm happy~. But in any case, let's move on from that. It seems that I have quite a bit to cover here.
Tetsuya. Man, that guy seems like no good, and I KNOW that him saying rude things to Satoko is NOT the end of it. He really doesn't seem like a good person, which I predicted from previous chapters. Man, I hope he doesn't turn out to be like one of the guys Mion used to hang out with. Though honestly, I really do think that's what's going to happen. ...He's still staring at Mion and Shion, eh? ...I honestly have this terrible feeling inside me that he's going to rape Mion or at least ATTEMPT to rape her. ...And I have a feeling that it's going to be Mion and not Shion, because, well... it adds to the trauma she had when she was little and would sort of be her past returned, though of course no one raped her from that gang, or so Mion says. She could be lying, though. Hopefully the club will be able to punish him if he did such a terrible thing, and I certainly wouldn't forgive him for adding onto Mion's already rather traumatic life. Also, she said that she wasn't ever going to get raped when she was talking to her parents before, referring to Keiichi, of course, and just by the fact that she said that... gosh, I really hope he doesn't, though. Of course, he may just attempt to do so, which would also be terrible.
Man, I also kind of hate how people think that if a guy and a girl sleep over, there will definitely be sex. ...Not true! Well, it's true in some cases, as that does happen quite a bit, but I can't see Mion and Keiichi having sex with each other while Shion's in the same room o3o. That... wouldn't be right. Though I guess I can sort of understand why her father is concerned. ...Fathers just kind of get like that when it comes to their daughters. ...My mom wouldn't ever let me have a sleepover with my friend who is a guy, but I've never asked her due to that. I guess that's just the way things are. Besides, Keiichi would never, ever, EVER do that to Mion. He's too nice to rape anyone, especially not Mion OR Shion for that matter. But it's going to be interesting, seeing what happens while Keiichi's parents are away. That's usually a spell for doom. It always is in Higurashi. In like... every single arc.
I don't think I can write anymore than this, so I'm going to end the review here, for the most part. Before I go, however, I want to add one thing. I know I've said this at least a thousand times, but really, it's fine if you are behind. I feel that way with BFB WAAAAY too often, mostly because I have all the time in the world to finish it. I rushed with GED because I only have a maximum of three months to complete it. I'm still shocked I managed to do so.
| Michael S. Repton chapter 8 . 9/29/2011
Another very enjoyable chapter, as always. No surprise to see Tetsuya revealed as an antagonist, but I agree with your comment, it would be disappointing if this was as far as it went, so I'm looking forward to watching things get much worse.
I really liked the passage where Keiichi reflects on Satoko's traps; that deepens our understanding of both characters and their friendship, and it was very touching. Really, the interaction between all the club members was very good, as it always is in your story. I especially liked Shion here; she's my favourite character and I'm glad you write her so well.
I'm not entirely convinced about Myō; the credits to Kai 10 (his only anime appearance) list him just as "Mion's father", whereas all characters who have official names are listed by name, no matter how minor they are. WWWJDIC says that Myō is not a Japanese given name, but it is the on reading of the kanji that means "name". So it could be a placeholder of the "insert name here" type. Please understand that this is just speculation; I haven't played the game so maybe it really does say that it is his actual name. In any case I'm not going to change it in my story; I feel if the writers wanted us to use that name, it's their problem they didn't make it clearer.
| The Minister of Silly Walks chapter 7 . 9/23/2011
Sadism is fun~
...For you xD
Cuz that chapter was cruel man ;_; I mean, I was of course spitting Kakashi's name when I thought about how he ditched Mion at the scene of the crime like that . but now I feel kind of bad. His past was the emotional equivalent of all the pain Mion went through in the previous chapter. I can't imagine losing my parents and then going off to try and live on my own with any one of my six little sisters. Not only is that just a stress-filled nightmare with few equals. And then to just lose them like that after going through so much . I can only imagine he feels infinitely more guilty when she dies though. Had he given her over to an orphanage, he may not have seen her again (or at least, not for a while) but at least she could have lived. And that's always better than dying a slow and painful death in the freezing cold ;_; stupid, stubborn Kakashi...*sniffle* The last scene made me come close to crying though. Akemi just sounds so pitiful as she's dying (as I suspect most children would x3 but anyway~).
And I freaking LOVED the introduction! ! ! 8D Seeing where Mion got the idea of the game club from was friggin brilliant and it was very fitting with the dark mood of this story that such a happy club should have originated from such unhappy events. Plus I found it to just be damn clever. So kudos to you~ x3
I do wonder what part, if any, the rest of Kakashi's gang will play in the fic. I know that Kakashi will probably have more to do since you went and gave him backstory (though also, gotta wonder, how much Kakashi will have to do in this fic). I can only imagine they'd serve to make Mion's situation worse while Kakashi tries to make it better.
And sorry if this review is crappy x3 My sister is throwing a surprise birthday party outside my room and it's making it hard to focus x_x This really was an awesome, tear jerking chapter though and as usual I can't wait to read more~ 8D Though next chapter certainly will be...;_; even harder to get through without a box of tissues than this one.
TTFN - Ta, Ta For Now
| Crimso chapter 7 . 9/20/2011
AH! It feels so good to be back on my own computer, with a working FF~. Too bad my hardrive got wiped. Oh well, that aside, I apologize for not reviewing earlier. I was in the middle of class when the chapter was posted, and I secretly read it, and I did not have time to review then...
Well, now we get to actually reviewing the content of this chapter, which I really liked. We already seem to know Kagami as a character for the most part from this, of course, there could be hidden secrets. I sort of knew that he was probably going to turn out to be the good guy of the group, judging by his personality. I doubt that he would be able to hurt Mion, who reminds him so much of his little sister. And man, was his backstory sad. And I'll get to that in a minute. I feel like IF he is to show up later, he'll end up protecting her or something like that. Or at least attempt to. Maybe make Mion realize he didn't quite WANT to abandon her... and then he'll probably die himself. Just a prediction, though. I can't really say much at only Chapter 5 of the story.
And man, Akemi really did remind me of Mion. I guess that was your clear intention, though. Akemi is one of my favorite Japanese names, by the way. A lot of my characters are named Akemi, just by default. I used that name in GED, I believe. But that's irrelevant right now. I honestly have to feel bad for poor Kagami. The scene where Akemi died was just heartbreaking, and we didn't need to know him well to feel the heartbreak. This chapter did enough for that. I wonder how Kagami put up with the rest of the gang. They all seem like pretty awful people. I wonder if they'll reappear, or if they're only here for backstory? ...I guess I can't make that prediction now. It's way too early, and I don't have any evidence for either.
I have to take a shower now. I'd like to make this review much, much longer, but I really do have to take a shower. ...I should have been working on my fanfiction today, but I didn't have the energy to write after my English Teacher assigned us a writing project involving overly describing things. That burned me out... temporally. But now I'm getting off topic. I do that a lot, don't I? Oh well. Awesome chapter, and I can't wait to see the rest! Take your time again... regret is a terrible thing when it comes to writing.
| Michael S. Repton chapter 7 . 9/19/2011
I think Keiichi could have been a bit more understanding; he had done worse things than steal before coming to Hinamizawa, and for much the same reasons. But conversely, perhaps he's unduly harsh precisely because hearing Mion's story brings back his own guilt over that incident.
As for Kagami's story, it was very well-written and I especially liked his complex feelings at the beginning. He's a most intriguing character and I'm looking forward to seeing him again in the main story. The latter half was strongly reminiscent of "Grave of the Fireflies" - indeed, I think a bit too similar, since this meant that I knew what was coming and that stopped it having quite the emotional impact it should have done.
Still, though, as always, brilliant writing and I can't wait for more :)
| Failhammer chapter 7 . 9/19/2011
I can understand Keiichi's reaction to Mion's past; I'd probably react in a similar way if I found out one of my friends did something like that. Despite Kagami being one of the ones who betrayed Mion, I couldn't help but feel bad for him after reading the story of his past. I think that's good, since it shows that he's not all bad; while I may not agree with what he did after the car crash, I understand why he did it.
I'm looking forward to reading more, though I think I'll need to go back and read the first few chapters since I think I've forgotten a few details.
| The Minister of Silly Walks chapter 6 . 9/17/2011
D: Oryou you horrid bitch!
That was so...painful. Again, going back to your ability to place the reader in the shoes of the characters, there were parts of this chapter that became difficult to read simply because I was so sickened by what Oryou was doing to her own granddaughter. And goddamn her gang for ditching her like that! I hope they and Oryou enjoy each other's company in the deepest circle of hell together where they will writhe in agony for all eternity D And screw Mion's mother too! I can get the whole "honor" crap, but any half-decent mother would have come forward and done something to stop this. Amazing really how Mion could manage to come out of this being the bubbly, happy girl we all know and love. And how does Mion ever manage to tolerate the company of her mother and grandmother after this? I probably would have smothered the old cow with a pillow while she slept if I were Mion!
Really though, as much as it made me sad, I really do love this torture scene for its creativity and plausibility. It was nothing extravagant but all the same you managed to put Mion through one hell of a nightmare here. Like the part where she got water dumped on her was so descriptive and well thought out. And my heart broke every time she was begging for mercy or screaming about how much it hurt. That's what really drove her pain home for me.
And Shion wins a gold star for being such an awesome sister 8D and for yelling at The Queen Bitch herself! D I laughed when I read that bit.
Anyway, sorry this review is so short. There's so much interference and noise going on around me _ can't really focus all that well. And I can't wait to read the next chapter in it's entirety ;3 In the words of Mr. Z: "There's no rush, pumpkin. Take your time, but take it quickly."
TTFN - Ta, Ta For Now
| Crimso chapter 6 . 9/15/2011
If things get worse like you say, then I can't wait to see what you have in store. No, really. This chapter wasn't too bad in terms of violence. It was really painful to see my poor, poor Mion being hurt like that, though. Those kids are a bunch of mean idiots that I would like to slap and/or do even worse things to. Like... I don't know... recreate what Mion had to go through? But seriously, the friends that betrayed her are a complete contrast to the main Higurashi nakama, who would never betray anyone, as evident in Tsumiboroshi-hen, in which they stick up for Rena even though she just killed someone. I like the idea of having a complete contrast in this story. It's fun to make up Mion's backstory, since her's isn't touched upon as much. We know what the other characters were doing three years or so before the series started, but not Mion. Trust me, I had a blast creating her backstory in Green-Eyed Demon.
Annnd if there's more torture, I'm sure it'll be to Mion. Why? Because fanfiction writers just have a tendency to do cruel, cruel things to their favorite characters. I-I don't really understand why, though. I do it too. The only reason why we do such things to Mion is because we love her :D.
But seriously, I did think that maaaybbbee Oryou's language was a little... overdone? Just a tad. A small tad, that would be. Hm... the fingernail punishment to Shion was harsh because she was, well, Shion. Oryou really does like Mion, though. But really, I can understand where you're coming from with her hurting the pride of the rich and great Sonozaki Family by hanging out with a bunch of thieves. I see her backstory, in which she got bored and did some crazy things, resemble's Keiichi and the model gun incident quite a bit. That's just something I noticed, though. Probably won't have any connection in the story whatsoever, but I just felt like pointing that out~.
And yes, I love the MionShion sisterly love, which is in no way romantic. I dislike Sonozakicest... because Mion and Shion would never love each other like THAT and their bond is strictly non-romantic. But really, I love to see how close the sisters are. As I said before, it's something that most fanfiction authors leave out and it really makes me sad. Not just fanfiction authors, but people in the Higurashi fandom in general fail to see how close Shion and Mion are, or just can't see Shion as anything other than a Psychotic Yandere, which really does make me sad. There's so much more to her character than that, and I applaud you for her attachment to Mion here, which was very realistic to her character. No, seriously, fanfiction writers should acknowledge their relationship a little more sometimes. They don't hate each other like some people think they do. That was just briefly in Meakashi-hen.
Annnd I understand if you can't update soon, since I'm also having issues with Blood Flows Black and updating, so really, you shouldn't worry about a thing. And filler chapters make me happy. It's nice seeing the Higurashi characters no matter what, really. That's why I don't mind the idea of the next three Kira OVAs. Except the twincest scene in OVA 1 will forever haunt me. And the Rika scene. No, really, that really overdid it...
Getting off topic there, sorry. Great chapter, as always, since I do love seeing Mion backstory and anything Mion related. I also love, love, LOVE the Sonozaki Family and any interactions between them, including this rather morbid one, is highly loved by me~. So this was really an awesome chapter for me. I can't wait to see more. I wonder if her old "friends" will show up again...