Reviews for The Proverbial Straw
Nihilist-Nny chapter 1 . 12/6/2013
This is touching, and oh-so moving! I like how you touched on Rose's trouble socializing.
Citrus Constellation chapter 1 . 1/31/2012
Undeadclown,

This story is wonderful. It has a very good and well developed plot which is supported with vivid vocabulary which I am very impressed with. I was entranced with your words. Although, I did see the word "muse" consecutively just once. Don't think that your story is bad just because of that- because your vocabulary is very advanced.

Another thing which I noticed was that the dialogue had quite a lot of pause. (ex. ... and commas) I understand this was to provide emotion and (obviously) pause, but you could also revise and use semicolons.

The feeling of this piece just gave me a very melancholy, yet happy, feeling which I will remember.

I look forward to more from you, as I am going to subscribe!

If you are inactive, then oh well.

Impressive work!

Sincerely,

Citrus Constellation (CC or SS)
Spider's Claw chapter 1 . 10/21/2011
I dont think I'll ever be able to find the right words to describe how awesome this story was. As the previous commentor states, all of the characters are in character. I enjoyed the writing style as its simillar to the true style of Homestuck whilest at the same time allowing for your own clear author's voice throughout the piece.

So I guess what Im trying to say is... Great job!
watchfob chapter 1 . 6/24/2011
This is absolutely brilliant. I'm brand new to the Homestuck fandom, and what a fantastic introduction this has been! Both Rose and John were perfectly in character and there was just the right amount of angst and sweetness in the piece. The way you developed the emotions, from hopelessness and hurt in the beginning to renewed determination at the end, was absolutely wonderful. I can't say how much I loved it. I LOVED IT SO MUCH. I LOVED IT THIS MUCH! *holds arms out wide*