|Reviews for The Bells of Freedom|
| Tear Droplet chapter 32 . 4/13/2015
I thought this story was pretty nice. It's one of the best ones I've read of FFVIII. The ending was a bit too loose for my liking but it leaves room for imagination.
| xFlawed Imperfectionx chapter 32 . 11/5/2014
Great story. I've had it on alert for a while but just now picked it back up (I had to start back from the beginning to refresh myself.)
The whole idea of the unfinished contract isn't something I thought about when I finished the game. Very thoughtful. I liked it.
Now for some critiques. I feel weird being openly critical of someone else's work, because you don't even know me. But as a music major in college, I know how helpful it is. It's how we as artists grow, and I want to be a part of thst process. I'll try to explain why I feel this way, not just "Hey this could be better." Feel free to ask any questions. If I seem nitpicky, it's because you're writing well.
The story as a whole sometimes got monotonous in its writing. There were times when you'd take one idea, like Squall's deadliness, and try to hit it from many people's perspectives, but you just ended up sort of repeating yourself, like you'd spend a lot of time saying the same thing again. You could have introduced the idea, developed it, and then if someone else needed to comment on the idea, just mention it in passing. Like, "It wasn't the first time Watts was unnerved at the SeeD's penchant for ruthless efficiency, and it wouldn't be the last. It was a sobering reminder that, before Rinoa had gotten the contract, they had been way over their heads."
It got better as the story progressed, though. You could definitely see your improvement.
You also left a couple loose ends, although I don't know if it was purposeful or not. The first was that we have no idea how Squall feels about Laguna, although I'm willing to bet that one was intentional. Kind of a thing thst's left up to the reader.
The other one was that near the beginning of the story, you set up this idea that Rinoa had a connection to Squall that he wasn't aware of, but that affected him. It was tied to this bond that they had as sorceress and knight. I'm on board with that 100%, but it seemed to be largely irrelevant throughout the story. It was used, but only really in small situations, when Squall was frustrated or confused or something. It seemed like a plot of its own, and that would have been cool, but it just seemed like nothing happened to it. How did it affect their relationship? It diffused minor situations, but dialogue and nonverbal things like contact can do the same thing. But it might also be used for major situations. As deadly as Squall was, what if he went too far? What if he snapped, and Rinoa had to use that ability to calm him? Something like that would have brought life into that plot.
You also mentioned a few times that Squall didn't know about this bond that was developing, hinting that Rinoa was looking for the right time to mention it, but after a while, the whole thing just dropped as it began getting heavily into Timber's independence movement. That would have thrown another wrench into their relationship, as Squall is largely a loner that's still really learning how to love.
The cool thing is that these things could be explored in a sequel. That would be great, and something that I would absolutely love to read. Squall's relationship with Laguna or lack thereof could be explored, and you could really hit the whole sorceress-Knight bond thing heavily. Rinoa here had to choose between Squall and Timber (and in the end got both...maybe a sequal could also touch on that. Was Caraway helping her in his own way? Could be cool) so maybe Squall is stuck between being her knight and being a SeeD. Like, maybe people don't like that Rinoa is a sorceress that walks around freely. Maybe that becomes a problem.
Anyway, I don't want this to sound like I didn't like it, so I'll end like this. This was a fantastic story, and the critiques are really kind of nitpicky things that would have given the story another dimension and really brought it to life even more, but this is definitely in the upper percent of fanfiction. Really good, and I loved it from beginning to end. Will definitely look at your other works.
| LaylaEvercrest chapter 32 . 10/23/2014
Ok some how I missed the last chapter! But what does squall do? Is there another story after this? agh! Well love it but its sad to see it end. Great job!
| gleamfang chapter 32 . 8/31/2014
It was a beautiful ending and way to throw in the curveball at the end with the good bye bit. That was absolutely heart wrenching.
I'm really you resolved things the way they were and yes you don't an epilogue but that's only because their tale is far from over isn't it? Haha
What I seem to be unable to recall is Why Caraway would be so willing to release Rinia into Balamb garden again. Might just have to pore over the older stories... Sounds like a plan!
| cheerlygal chapter 32 . 8/18/2014
It's a great ride so far:) Of course, it makes me wanna reread all your series again!
See you in your other stories!
| JDX201 chapter 32 . 7/31/2014
This story is one of the few 10 out of 10s I have read. Your character development is flawless and you bring a very nice understanding of Squall's introverted and Riona's extroverted personalities. The story is deep and exciting. My glass is raised.
| x Euphoria chapter 32 . 7/20/2014
OH nooo it's over. I really loved it. It was wonderfully written and exciting with lots of love :). I'm a little sad about Laguna's message. It was very much like him.
Thanks for writing this I had a lot of fun reading it!
| x Euphoria chapter 31 . 7/20/2014
I'm not done reading yet but I'M SO HAPPY CARAWAY IS SENDING RINOA TO BALAMB. OMG. :) Ah so happy.
Of course Squall finally goes to Delling to get Rinoa and she's already on route to Balamb aha. :P
God I love this chapter fills me up with happiness :) Only one more to go :[
| x Euphoria chapter 30 . 7/19/2014
Ok. I just had real tears when Rinoa told Squall she wasn't going with him. oh my god.
I'm so glad there is another chapter I don't think I could live if this was the last one.
| x Euphoria chapter 28 . 7/19/2014
I forgot to mention how I LOVE that Rinoa plays a big part in the battles. Squall recognizes that she is powerful and is a great asset. Instead of being helpless, but of course that doesn't mean he doesn't care or want to protect her. I'm just really glad you acknowledge that little fact. Most stories I feel don't give her enough credit in her abilities :).
OH MY GOD WHAT JUST HAPPENED!? Oh my goodness.
| x Euphoria chapter 26 . 7/19/2014
Another great action chapter :) I'm almost done with the story though :[ But all good things have to end sometime _.
| x Euphoria chapter 25 . 7/19/2014
This chapter was so amazing. I really liked Shockwave Pulsar. I only remembered it from Quistis blue magic :P But great writing in this chapter :)
| x Euphoria chapter 17 . 7/18/2014
Oh no! Rowan turned out to be bad :[ Or well at least it's shaping up to be that way. Poor Zone. I'm glad he'll be getting training from Zell though. :)
I'm really impressed with the plot of this story. I don't come across a post game story that revolves around Timber. Most people even myself sort of forget about it. Caught up from all the romance post game :P.
| x Euphoria chapter 11 . 7/18/2014
Twice in a row you got me dying with laughter. I can imagine Selphie watching Rinoa and Squall go at it munching on popcorn. I can't get that image out of my head. OMG I love it. :)
I have tears in my eyes because Grams thought Squall had two girlfriends. OMG AND THEY WENT ALONG WITH IT. Priceless.
OMG and the end again. Watts' one liners are golden.
| x Euphoria chapter 10 . 7/18/2014
I loved this chapter. I can totally imagine Squall baking Rinoa a birthday cake but because of sexy times it gets ruined :P.
Watts calling Squall a psycho xD Loved it. Also Selphie was too cute this chapter. I can totally see Selphie bugging Rinoa about her sex life with Squall hehe.
LMFAO OMG Ok I'm dying of laughter. Squall smiled and Watts said he looked like a serial killer. God I love your story.