|Reviews for Official Fanfiction University ASFES|
| Banshee chapter 9 . 5/19/2012
I like this story. The plot is good, everybody is in character, and there is plenty of good ol' Tom foolery. I wish I had found your story earlier so I could submit a main character. As it is I'll just shoot you a filler character.
Name: Alice Neichin.
Sex: (yes please) female
Favorite character: Wheatly
Description: Short, blond, blue eyes, lots of freckles, and lesdixic. (That thing that makes you read letters and numbers backwards, thus making spelling almost impossible.) Plus a dash of good old ADHD.
I hope to be reading a lot more from you two. Until then, be sure to think with portals.
| Curtisimo chapter 9 . 5/19/2012
Yay, some actual book learnin'! Who would've guessed the most boring part of the story came from GLaDOS, though...
I love how the frankenkoobs have changed. Originally a "bad thing that happens when you misspell" they're now just everyone's pets.
Also, Cave Johnson is STILL ALIVE!
(koob is the correct spelling. Cube is a common way to misspell koob.)
| interdimensionalPortaller chapter 9 . 5/19/2012
Cave Johnson from "Earth One" is attacking your universe, isn't he.
I understand. He also attacked Inter-Dimensional. Worst days of its management I ever had.
Of course then a bird took the "Mindaugas Narušis" cyborg boy and remade him to be part bird, but that's for the next chapter of Yes, You Got The Patient's Name Right.
| MysteriousMoonCo chapter 1 . 4/30/2012
Misty: Woot! Finally, an update! I was worried that you'd forgotten about this fic. _
Of course, being Vice President of the Chelley Club, I have to defend my favorite shipping. I'm not denying that you've made some valid points, I just want to put in my two cents. So, without further ado, here's:
Ten Counters for Your Ten Reasons Why 'Chelley' Isn't True
1.) Ok, yes, it is true that Chell would probably not fall in love with a robotic metal sphere. However, that doesn't mean that there is no possible way they could have a relationship. Yes, the whole 'human transformation' concept is a bit silly, but for all we know Wheatley could have been a human turned AI like GLaDOS. He certainly sounds and behaves more human then the other personallity constructs.
2.) Following my previous statement, Wheatley exhibits more human-like emotions than the other AIs, so who's to say he is incapable of love. Maybe not at first sight necessarily, but in time he might discover that he has feeling for Chell.
3.) True, Wheatley is designed to be an idiot and can be oblivious, but he's not completely braindead. I'm pretty sure he would at least notice romantic advances.
4.) Okay, yes, they barely know each other. But if you just woke up from a several hundred year coma and the first sentient being you meet is also the first robot in this facility who is not only not trying to kill you, but is helping you escape, wouldn't you develop some attatchment to him? He was the only ally Chell had, and although she might not necessaarily love him, she would at least have a close bond of friendship with him. As for Wheatley, Chell was one of the first, if only, humans that was never mean to him and actually put up with his ramblings and stupidity.
5.) As I preiviously stated, Wheatley is most likely predjudiced against humans because he was likely treated badly by the Aperture scientists because of his idiotic nature. But, once again, Chell is probably the first human who put up with him, hence why he tried to apologise for his insult. Just because he dislikes humans in general doesn't mean he dislikes Chell.
6.) Pardon? When exactly did Wheatley suggest to turn Chell in to GLaDOS? And as I recall, he always seemd happy to see that Chell made it through the tests safely. And he was considerate of her sometimes, like whenever he would light dangerous jumps for her when they were escaping.
7.) Yes, he was insensitive for all the brain damage comments. But like you said, it was probably due to his programmed idiocy. He may not have even been aware that Chell might have found those comments insulting.
8.) Yeah, this one is kind of a deal killer. But he was incredibly sorry for trying to kill Chell. And I doubt that Chell would be completely angry at him, considering all the times he helped her while he was still good. I think she would eventually forgive him. I mean, can anyone seriously stay mad at that adorable little ball of British cuteness for that long?
9.) Okay, very valid point. But like I said earlier, they don't necessarily have to fall in love instantly. It would take time, and a human body for Wheatley, but they could find love eventually over the course of a well written and well paced story. I'm just saying, it could happen with enough time and appropriate circumstances.
10.) Let me make one point perfectly clear: For the record, we have absolutely no idea what was running through Chells head at the time of the final battle, or what she planned on doing once it was over. Maybe she did feel nothing for him at the time and didn't care what happened to him, or maybe she was just doing what she had to do so the wouldn't all die in a giant fireball and wasn't interested in revenge at all. Maybe she would have tried to take Wheatley with her if and when GLaDOS let her go, or maybe she didn't want to let go of him and send him careening of into space. The truth is, we don't know and probably never will know what she thought or would have done.
Whew, that was a big rant. But, as I said before, I respect your points on the matter, but I'm just defending my favorite shipping.
| Lydiacatfish chapter 8 . 4/19/2012
Wheatly tried so hard to kill her, especially in that part with the pit. He's like, "Down in the pit is your parents! And a pony! And a boyfriend! And shoes! And other things girls like. So please just jump in the pit." I bet some of these students would go for jumping in the pit if he told them such things were there.
| JasonChurch chapter 8 . 4/18/2012
Ok.. liked this chapter. One point that was not raised is that emotional attachment does not equal love. There is little doubt in my mind that Chell would have developed an emotional attachment to Wheatley in the beginning of the game, which is part of the reason why Chell is not reluctant at all later in the game. Wheatley betrayed Chell's trust by smashing her down into Old Aperture. Just a thought people. Anyway, cannot wait for the next chapter.
| Arvata chapter 8 . 4/18/2012
I like how your story is developing so far The plot is highly interesting and you write quite well. While fan-fiction does exist to humor the question "What if..?", I agree that certain grammar-requirements and levels of respect for the canon plot/characters should be upheld. The sense of humor utilized is a nice breath of air in between the intriguing classes, which, I must say, are the main reasons I follow this. I love how you confront popular theories and pairings and can barely wait to read more, so please continue whenever you have the time.
On another note, I'm glad that you've toned down Alix's attitude at least somewhat in the later chapters. It's been bugging me quite a lot. Being able to impersonate a famous, omnipotent character is cool and all, I get you, but to degrade said character by letting your alter-ego copy her best and most intimidating features is just downright selfish and disrespectful. Doesn't she have traits of her own to be recognized for? Because there is only one GLaDOS, that should be clear to anyone. And I understand that both of you need authority and control over the cast to run that school, but just don't get too cocky, that's my advice. Not flattering at all. You are guests in Aperture too, remember, just like the students. So simply watch out for that, and you'll be fine.
| kitty- ultimate sherlockian chapter 8 . 4/15/2012
Oh. My. Cave.
I have to say, I loved that! Please tell me there will be more?
I cant wait!
I personally dont write fanfic, on the premise that I suck. And that I prefer reading amazing fanfic to writing a legible one. I wan tto be in this school in real life because I would love to meet the characters. But that is beyond the point.
please do keep writing, I would absolutely adore reading more. Especially the foreboding bit with morality core.
Also, good luck with the number thing.
And I beg your forgiveness for any atrocious spelling, I am on my non-spellchecking nook.
| A1v1n1 chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Yaaaay Ch 8 is here! I want ch 9 now
Why am I not in the story yet o.o
| A1v1n1 chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Yaaaay Ch 8 is here! I want ch 9 now
Why am I not in the story yet o.o
| Curtisimo chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
Dear Aperture Science Test Subject Self Reporting Form
I noticed some kid was writing a diary of everything that happened in the School (Nate? Nat?), and decided I had to one up him, so I started my own.
The fact I couldn't get a diary, only a ASTSSRF, speaks to my standing in the school, I would assume.
You know, it's strange. Everyone I've talked to (and myself) fell as though we've just woken from a months-long sleep. But how is that possible? Maybe there WAS something in the Mac and cheese. Or, non-deadly neurotoxin, perhaps?
I enjoyed the Grammar Jog today. I dont know why everyone hated it so much. Wheatley barely taught us anything (well, taught me anything. I can apply a semicolon, thank you very much) and showed us some of the Center. I wasn't aware there was ACTUALLY a fifteen acre floor made of glass. Who installs that?
Also, I've noticed these things called plot holes. They look quite a lot like these... well, they're actually just called holes... but there these things in this videogame Fez I played once, where you mess with the universe, but of you mess with it too much the holes appear, sometimes making it imposible to procede. And they take you to... well, nowhere. You have to Killscreen to get out.
Speaking of which, I wonder what would happen if you Killscreen on GLaDOS.
Time to experiment. For Science.
No, no, chances are everyone in the facility would die. I'm too valuable to die.
Caught one of the other kids deploying a micro camera in Chells room through one of my feeds (the wonders of wire tapping and HAX). I won't name names, but let's say one of the chellys has an unhealthy obsession for one of the two.
What's this? That Nathanial guy ordered pepper spray. Probably in case the fangirls get jumpy. Well, let's just redirect that order to... I dunno... the Anger core? Yes... ATTACK, FANGIRLS! STRIKE NOW!
Wait, did I just give PEPPER SPRAY to the anger core?
Eh. Worry 'bout it later.
There is a surprising lack of the Different Turret to be found. I snuck out during the night to look for her (the wonders of HAX!) but, nowhere to be found. Maybe someone 'redeemed' it. Im suprised GLaDOS didn't say anything about me sneaking out. Or maybe she was sleeping. No, AIs don't sleep. And the cameras were following. Well, who gives one, noones said anything.
Changing that order gives me an idea. I could just... finagle some of the orders around to change the recipients. To me. Then sell the orders! For dollars! IT'S GENIOUS! THERE ARE NO GLARINGLY OBVIOUS WAYS THIS WON'T WORK!
well, I'm out of stuff to say. G'bye, ASTSSRF.
Curtisimo - why did you have to pick option 2?*
*if you're confused, that's not directed at anyone in particular. If its Curtisimo - xxxxx, it's just something from my day.
| msfcatlover chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
I love this. Flat-out love this. Even though you've ut effort into disproving my favorite pairing. *shrugs* Meh, I'm not rabid, I can take a few jibes. It's the darker sides of pairings that make them interresting, and the best Chelley fanfics deal with the /enormous/ lack of trust between them.
Please keep writing this story. I'll keep my eyes peeled for the next chapter (and add a story alert. That'll help too.)
| msfcatlover chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
...I'd like to thank you for this. I feel sorta silly, because I do write humanizations and romance, though I try to keep it at a "could also be just-friends" level... I'm not really applying, but I'm going to fill out that form anyway. Because it looks like fun. If you put me in anyway, I will probably fangirl like an idiot *sweatdrop*
Name: Sophie, or msf.
Age: not for internet to know...
Physical description: Shortish, out of control curls, pale, alergic to excercise. And freckles. Lots and lots of freckles.
Shoe size: 6 to 7, depending on where I'm shopping.
How would your friends describe you? Quiet, silly and funny (though I don't try to be...I just say things and people start laughing...)
How would your enemies describe you? Annoying know-it-all, most likely. Possibly anti-social as well.
Do you have any fears or allergies that we should know about? Allergic to pine trees, all pollens, molds, and dust...though not to a toxic degree. Spiders freak me out.
Have you been to an OFU before? I'm afraid not. Could you explain it to me?
Name ONE luxury item to bring with you: Internet access.
How do you feel about wearing orange? Depends how it's worn!
You as a writer
Why do you write Portal fanfiction? Because I loved the games, and the characters are a challenge to write, and I needed to branch out. It's such an awesome feeling to find the characters' "voice," even if it won't say what you want it to.
Who is your favorite character? I'm torn...Either GLaDOS or Wheatley.
What pairings do you write, if any, and why? Chelley. Because it's complicated, can be dark or cute, and adorable when done well. Also, good practice for writing romancein the future.
Do you write human-transformation fics? Sometimes I do humanizations, yes. I need to write more of the robots' canon forms...
If yes, which cores do you portray as female? Curiosity, Morality, and GLaDOS (central core)
Have you ever created a Mary Sue/Gary Stu/godmoding character? *sweatdrop* Haven't we all? I've been working on that...
What ratings do you usually give your stories? T or K. Mostly T.
What genres do you usually write? Angst, Adventure, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, and some Romance.
Do you write Portal crossovers? No, but I write AUs
You and the canon
Have you played Portal and Portal 2 to completion? The second one, yes. The first one I've watched videos of, but have yet to get my hands on a copy.
Have you read Lab Rat? Yes!
What aspect of Chell makes her most able to defeat GLaDOS? Her ability to think outside of the box and do things GLaDOS doesn't expect.
What famous thought experiment is it implied that GLaDOS attempts to recreate? Schrodinger's cat (did I spell it right?)
Describe the first Rattmann Den in the first game: I'm afraid I can't. I haven't played the first game, and details like you asked for tend not to stick with me until I witness them while playing.
Up to what temperature can Aperture Science technology continue to operate? 4000 degrees Kelvin. 5000 in some translations.
What visual feature makes the Companion Cube unique? Pink hearts and stripes. In Portal2, the markings glow slightly.
What shape is an Edgeless Safety Cube? It's a sphere.
Match these eye colors to their corresponding cores: purple, red, green, pink, orange. Morality is purple, Anger is red, Adventure, or "Rick," is green, Fact, or "Craig," is pink, and Curiosity is orange.
When in the game is Chell's name used? I'm not sure if this quote was ever used or not, but: "Do you ever get the feeling that your name has just been spoken for the last time? Well, this is that moment. Because I'm going to kill you...Chell."
How does Rattmann make killing turrets easier? Doesn't he mark the portal spots somehow?
How long has Chell been in Extended Relaxation when Wheatley wakes her up at the start of Portal 2? 9999999999999999999999(etc)
What is Wheatley's official title? Intelligence Dampening Sphere.
What happened to Cave Johnson and his assistant? Cave died of moon rock poisoning, and Caroline became GLaDOS.
What item does Chell have with her at the end of Portal 2? The Companion Cube. Also, possibly, the long-fall boots.
What do you discover at the end of the Cooperative Testing Courses? Humans. And in the DLC, birds.
...I was right. That was fun!
| Frankenturret Lover chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
| Emily-Of-Midgard chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Awesome chapter! The list of reasons for Chelley was well thought out (don't really like it myself, but well writen or really light chelley is fine). I can't wait to see if you guys will tackle the crack parrings. I don't care what anyone says, factventure is awesome.
Anyways, again, awesome chapter!