Reviews for Official Fanfiction University ASFES
Arvata chapter 8 . 4/18/2012
I like how your story is developing so far The plot is highly interesting and you write quite well. While fan-fiction does exist to humor the question "What if..?", I agree that certain grammar-requirements and levels of respect for the canon plot/characters should be upheld. The sense of humor utilized is a nice breath of air in between the intriguing classes, which, I must say, are the main reasons I follow this. I love how you confront popular theories and pairings and can barely wait to read more, so please continue whenever you have the time.

On another note, I'm glad that you've toned down Alix's attitude at least somewhat in the later chapters. It's been bugging me quite a lot. Being able to impersonate a famous, omnipotent character is cool and all, I get you, but to degrade said character by letting your alter-ego copy her best and most intimidating features is just downright selfish and disrespectful. Doesn't she have traits of her own to be recognized for? Because there is only one GLaDOS, that should be clear to anyone. And I understand that both of you need authority and control over the cast to run that school, but just don't get too cocky, that's my advice. Not flattering at all. You are guests in Aperture too, remember, just like the students. So simply watch out for that, and you'll be fine.
kitty- ultimate sherlockian chapter 8 . 4/15/2012
Oh. My. Cave.

I have to say, I loved that! Please tell me there will be more?

I cant wait!

I personally dont write fanfic, on the premise that I suck. And that I prefer reading amazing fanfic to writing a legible one. I wan tto be in this school in real life because I would love to meet the characters. But that is beyond the point.

please do keep writing, I would absolutely adore reading more. Especially the foreboding bit with morality core.

Also, good luck with the number thing.

And I beg your forgiveness for any atrocious spelling, I am on my non-spellchecking nook.
A1v1n1 chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Yaaaay Ch 8 is here! I want ch 9 now

Why am I not in the story yet o.o
A1v1n1 chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Yaaaay Ch 8 is here! I want ch 9 now

Why am I not in the story yet o.o
Curtisimo chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
Dear Aperture Science Test Subject Self Reporting Form

I noticed some kid was writing a diary of everything that happened in the School (Nate? Nat?), and decided I had to one up him, so I started my own.

The fact I couldn't get a diary, only a ASTSSRF, speaks to my standing in the school, I would assume.

You know, it's strange. Everyone I've talked to (and myself) fell as though we've just woken from a months-long sleep. But how is that possible? Maybe there WAS something in the Mac and cheese. Or, non-deadly neurotoxin, perhaps?

I enjoyed the Grammar Jog today. I dont know why everyone hated it so much. Wheatley barely taught us anything (well, taught me anything. I can apply a semicolon, thank you very much) and showed us some of the Center. I wasn't aware there was ACTUALLY a fifteen acre floor made of glass. Who installs that?

Also, I've noticed these things called plot holes. They look quite a lot like these... well, they're actually just called holes... but there these things in this videogame Fez I played once, where you mess with the universe, but of you mess with it too much the holes appear, sometimes making it imposible to procede. And they take you to... well, nowhere. You have to Killscreen to get out.

Speaking of which, I wonder what would happen if you Killscreen on GLaDOS.

Time to experiment. For Science.

No, no, chances are everyone in the facility would die. I'm too valuable to die.

Caught one of the other kids deploying a micro camera in Chells room through one of my feeds (the wonders of wire tapping and HAX). I won't name names, but let's say one of the chellys has an unhealthy obsession for one of the two.

What's this? That Nathanial guy ordered pepper spray. Probably in case the fangirls get jumpy. Well, let's just redirect that order to... I dunno... the Anger core? Yes... ATTACK, FANGIRLS! STRIKE NOW!

Wait, did I just give PEPPER SPRAY to the anger core?

Eh. Worry 'bout it later.

There is a surprising lack of the Different Turret to be found. I snuck out during the night to look for her (the wonders of HAX!) but, nowhere to be found. Maybe someone 'redeemed' it. Im suprised GLaDOS didn't say anything about me sneaking out. Or maybe she was sleeping. No, AIs don't sleep. And the cameras were following. Well, who gives one, noones said anything.

Changing that order gives me an idea. I could just... finagle some of the orders around to change the recipients. To me. Then sell the orders! For dollars! IT'S GENIOUS! THERE ARE NO GLARINGLY OBVIOUS WAYS THIS WON'T WORK!


well, I'm out of stuff to say. G'bye, ASTSSRF.

Curtisimo - why did you have to pick option 2?*

*if you're confused, that's not directed at anyone in particular. If its Curtisimo - xxxxx, it's just something from my day.
msfcatlover chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
I love this. Flat-out love this. Even though you've ut effort into disproving my favorite pairing. *shrugs* Meh, I'm not rabid, I can take a few jibes. It's the darker sides of pairings that make them interresting, and the best Chelley fanfics deal with the /enormous/ lack of trust between them.

Please keep writing this story. I'll keep my eyes peeled for the next chapter (and add a story alert. That'll help too.)
msfcatlover chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
...I'd like to thank you for this. I feel sorta silly, because I do write humanizations and romance, though I try to keep it at a "could also be just-friends" level... I'm not really applying, but I'm going to fill out that form anyway. Because it looks like fun. If you put me in anyway, I will probably fangirl like an idiot *sweatdrop*




Name: Sophie, or msf.

Age: not for internet to know...

Gender: Female

Physical description: Shortish, out of control curls, pale, alergic to excercise. And freckles. Lots and lots of freckles.

Shoe size: 6 to 7, depending on where I'm shopping.

How would your friends describe you? Quiet, silly and funny (though I don't try to be...I just say things and people start laughing...)

How would your enemies describe you? Annoying know-it-all, most likely. Possibly anti-social as well.

Do you have any fears or allergies that we should know about? Allergic to pine trees, all pollens, molds, and dust...though not to a toxic degree. Spiders freak me out.

Have you been to an OFU before? I'm afraid not. Could you explain it to me?

Name ONE luxury item to bring with you: Internet access.

How do you feel about wearing orange? Depends how it's worn!



You as a writer

Why do you write Portal fanfiction? Because I loved the games, and the characters are a challenge to write, and I needed to branch out. It's such an awesome feeling to find the characters' "voice," even if it won't say what you want it to.

Who is your favorite character? I'm torn...Either GLaDOS or Wheatley.

What pairings do you write, if any, and why? Chelley. Because it's complicated, can be dark or cute, and adorable when done well. Also, good practice for writing romancein the future.

Do you write human-transformation fics? Sometimes I do humanizations, yes. I need to write more of the robots' canon forms...

If yes, which cores do you portray as female? Curiosity, Morality, and GLaDOS (central core)

Have you ever created a Mary Sue/Gary Stu/godmoding character? *sweatdrop* Haven't we all? I've been working on that...

What ratings do you usually give your stories? T or K. Mostly T.

What genres do you usually write? Angst, Adventure, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, and some Romance.

Do you write Portal crossovers? No, but I write AUs



You and the canon

Have you played Portal and Portal 2 to completion? The second one, yes. The first one I've watched videos of, but have yet to get my hands on a copy.

Have you read Lab Rat? Yes!

What aspect of Chell makes her most able to defeat GLaDOS? Her ability to think outside of the box and do things GLaDOS doesn't expect.

What famous thought experiment is it implied that GLaDOS attempts to recreate? Schrodinger's cat (did I spell it right?)

Describe the first Rattmann Den in the first game: I'm afraid I can't. I haven't played the first game, and details like you asked for tend not to stick with me until I witness them while playing.

Up to what temperature can Aperture Science technology continue to operate? 4000 degrees Kelvin. 5000 in some translations.

What visual feature makes the Companion Cube unique? Pink hearts and stripes. In Portal2, the markings glow slightly.

What shape is an Edgeless Safety Cube? It's a sphere.

Match these eye colors to their corresponding cores: purple, red, green, pink, orange. Morality is purple, Anger is red, Adventure, or "Rick," is green, Fact, or "Craig," is pink, and Curiosity is orange.

When in the game is Chell's name used? I'm not sure if this quote was ever used or not, but: "Do you ever get the feeling that your name has just been spoken for the last time? Well, this is that moment. Because I'm going to kill you...Chell."

How does Rattmann make killing turrets easier? Doesn't he mark the portal spots somehow?

How long has Chell been in Extended Relaxation when Wheatley wakes her up at the start of Portal 2? 9999999999999999999999(etc)

What is Wheatley's official title? Intelligence Dampening Sphere.

What happened to Cave Johnson and his assistant? Cave died of moon rock poisoning, and Caroline became GLaDOS.

What item does Chell have with her at the end of Portal 2? The Companion Cube. Also, possibly, the long-fall boots.

What do you discover at the end of the Cooperative Testing Courses? Humans. And in the DLC, birds.

...I was right. That was fun!
Frankenturret Lover chapter 1 . 4/14/2012
Emily-Of-Midgard chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Awesome chapter! The list of reasons for Chelley was well thought out (don't really like it myself, but well writen or really light chelley is fine). I can't wait to see if you guys will tackle the crack parrings. I don't care what anyone says, factventure is awesome.


Anyways, again, awesome chapter!
interdimensionalPortaller chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Okay, here have... /a number/ of reasons what would make me, legitimate Chell Johnson, closer to Wheatley, eventually romantically:

1. The horrible fanfic writer had him blown up in my face, so he's like a symbol of rebellion that I am in.

2. From what I heard from empatheticAmazon (from here on shortened to eA), Wheatley, in the kernelsprite form, apologized like a billion times, so I guess he's sorry about the monstrous things he did I don't know about because there is a certain other person who did monstrous things I know about, and he did NOT apologize for them.

3. Does it look like either I or eA are going to marry GLaDOS? We three are all female, for me GLaDOS is the horrible fanfic writer's alleged future wife and for her GLaDOS is no one more than someone who finally let her out. Well she should learn from me and how I said "fuck you" to Aperture AND escaped from it myself.

4. Minor characters are just that: minor characters.
Faux Promises chapter 7 . 4/14/2012
Oh wow, butthurt alert down there! Somebody's mad at the fact that some fans are tired of the archive being filled with massive amounts of OOC android porn!

No, sorry, the point of fanfiction shouldn't be to turn the characters into the author's depraved sex fantasies. Maybe that would be the point if the author chose not to upload it to a public site to be viewed by others. But when you upload it here, people will respond, and when you sit there demanding that only positive responses are given, you look like an immature douchebag who belongs in some hugbox forum.

Once the characters become unrecognizable bastardizations of their canon selves, it really ceases to be fanfiction and starts to be fans projecting what they wish the characters were with very little respect for the source material. That often being sex-crazed idiots who wuv each other.

Sorry if you can't handle that, kids. Don't post your shit here if you can't tolerate any disagreement.


Gamerteen13 chapter 8 . 4/14/2012
Note for future fanfic writing:

Limit the use of cryptic hints/answers, it's bad /enough/ you appear in a room with no clue how you got there, but you don't need some random beacon of hope telling you the way to get out in Simlish.

Dear Diarnalog,

Allow me to take a moment to say: Ow, ow my legs, ow.

Grammar Jog Wheatley spouting proper comma usage at us whilst jogging.

Not. Fun.

Then, we had a lecture on pairings!


Chelley, ChellDOS, and WheatDOS all debunked officially! Woot!

That said, not many people were happy with me saying "[Love]'s ridiculous enough between humans. But Chell and a robot? That's just gross.".


Note to Self: Sign a requisition form for some Aperture Science Pepper Spray or something.


Secondary Note to Self: Activate Aperture Science Localized Orb-shaped-handle Closing... Screw it, lock the door before bed, prop the chair against it, too.


Also, something /freaky/ is going on, apparently, random holes in space are appearing all over Aperture, and they open and close randomly.

...Sounds almost like a plot for a Doctor Who episode to me.

If I hear the "Vworping" of a blue police box, I'm not gonna be a happy camper.

Good Thought of the Day: ...I'll get back to you on that.

Neutral Thought of the Day: Wasn't the chiel/Chell thing up to interpretation?

Alternate Neutral Thought of the Day: Surely they won't let me get murdered by rabid fangirls...

Scary Thought of the Day: ...Right?

Evil Thought of the Day: If a turret dies, can I cannibalize it to make a machine-gun-gauntlet?


Name: Nathanial "Nathan" I.

Rank: Test Subject(?)

Item Requested: Three sets of Aperture Science Pepper Spray/Mace

Reason For Request: I think some Chelley fangirls are out for my blood. Possibly some ChellDOS and WheatDOS fans, too. I want a means to survive in the event some of them go after me. As I recall it, didn't one person have a knife? And a sword?

"Hmm..." muttered Nathan as he looked at the paper, which in his own handwriting read "Be wary of Loki.", he pulled out every scrap of info he had in his head on the Norse deity... which wasn't much, "Let me think... Wasn't he the trickster god with a silver tounge? Who could that be? ...Wheatley? Is Wheatley up to something? ...I'll ask the others. See what they have to say about this." he paused a second, before adding, "Rrrright after I see if my Pepper Spray request has been approved." He put the piece of paper in his jumpsuit pocket, and went about his business.


Okay, that's over with.

Glad to see this thing isn't dead.

All the above things are things that I would probably do/write, given the situation.

That's... honestly all I know about Loki without using the almighty research power that is Google.

He put down 'sets' instead of 'bottles', because he figured that GLaDOS could get sarcastic, and give him three bottles of liquid metal, which were, at one point in time, maces.

That way, either he'd have a bottle of person-deterrent, or a large pointy bludgeoning object.

...As long as she approves of it, in any case.
loveasaconstruct chapter 7 . 2/3/2012
Alright, you. Listen up.

This is ABSURD. Excuse my French, but seriously, what kind of fucking brain disease do you have that prevents you from realizing that this is FAN FICTION? Fan fiction is where you legitimately get to say, "Screw canon!" That's a big portion of what fan fiction is for: bending the rules and letting YOUR imagination do the work rather than the companies who originally developed the concepts and franchises. I LIKE bending the rules. I LIKE being able to freely publish things that mess with the central concepts of the games. So me putting GLaDOS in a humanoid form and having her slowly develop a relationship with Chell makes me an immature adolescent? I like canonicity sometimes, but the best part is letting your mind do the talking.

You're even more stupid and ignorant than the king of absurdity himself: Wheatley. It sickens me how SO many people think that everyone has to stick with the original concepts, or they're moronic little deprived adolescent idiotic ignoramuses.

And you know what? People are free to think what they want to think. They are FREE to walk away from the original path and create their own paths. To repeat myself, that is what this website is FOR. THAT IS FAN FICTION IN A FUCKING NUTSHELL. If you don't like the shit that innocent people have to say, then IGNORE IT and GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE instead of calling them 'immature adolescents' and creating a weak petition to remove their publications.

In layman's terms, what the hell is wrong with you? Why do you insist on attacking them just because they write things that abide by the very purpose of fan fiction?
JasonChurch chapter 5 . 1/31/2012
I really appreciate how you ladies kept Chell's not talking open for interpretation. Personally, I like to think that the neurotoxin from the final battle of Portal, in addition to her long stay in the relaxation vault, has damaged her Broca's Area of the brain, which now for some unknown reason, defaults to the motor cortex. But that is just my opinion, and unless Valve comes out and tells me different (or I hear/read one that I like better), then I am going to believe it.
JasonChurch chapter 7 . 1/30/2012
Finally, fellow canonwhores! Hail, and well met! Now I have a quick quiz of one question about canon, which I'm guessing that most people may not know of. Of many people know about. What is the condition of Earth when Chell is let out of Aperture Science?
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