|Reviews for Play Date|
| Off to Church chapter 4 . 1/3/2017
For real, I feel so sinful reading this. Like I walked in on something so intimate and decided to just sit there and watch, invading their privacy.
I really like how you spread this out (likeVanitasspreadAqua'sleg). I find it unique that you split it into chapters instead of letting it go on in one long one-shot, which also did immense magic to the pacing. And, I have to say, this has to be one of, if /the/, most masterfully written lemon I have ever read.
Sidenote: lol Terra not getting any of Aqua haha. I'd have actually liked to see Vanitas "rub it in his face" I think if would've been funny, but I like this a lot too.
I'm gonna go bathe in holy water now because that really got me hot amd bothered.
| DealWithAnnaTalsie0025 chapter 4 . 1/1/2017
I was laughing at the boys' wisecracking punchlines.. Waffles with hotdogs...sounds sexy
| Code knight chapter 2 . 10/23/2016
Great job on the , Nuaghty, nuaghty.'' part.
| RenesmeVivio chapter 4 . 12/11/2015
I like their reaction towards Aqua and oh Ven you are so adorable hahaha.
Actually when I read this fic I found it cool yet tensed, like you are crawling to find an exit anywhere, and wanted to finish everything.
Now I understand why you are feeling unease while writing this fic, it's like that u write in a different way not ur style.
| Yawara chapter 1 . 4/5/2014
By the way, I forgot to mention in my last review: Bach was not of Classical music era. He was part of the Baroque era BEFORE the classical era where Beethoven, Mozart and someone else were well known in that time period.
| Yawara chapter 4 . 4/5/2014
Hi, I accidently stumbled upon this story, and I would have to say, your story was interesting, but if only the Aqua here was actually another girl character, like say, Anastasia Steele instead, sorry to say. Or it would be better off if this story was turned into an original one with original characters in their places.
Yes, I know very well from the beginning, you don't advocate these sexual acts and you won't be writing lemons again, but since no one offered actual critiques on the characters written here, please let me do so.
Several characters were being out of character here, like Aqua, Vanitas and Sora. Sora would not be that sarcastic towards his own friends, even if one of them was that innocent towards something; in fact, he would be as innocent as Ventus in reality; he was one of the nicest guys throughout all the games. Vanitas wasn't as out of character as Sora and Aqua, but there were odd parts that really struck me to raise my eyebrows several times. Vanitas would rather say Aqua would be the smarter victim that still got killed regardlessly in the end of the movie. With his dark personality, he would've surely came from an abusive family instead of a seemingly peaceful one written here. That was one of the examples, but I don't feel like delving too much on him as much as Aqua.
Aqua was the most out of character girl I have ever read about throughout this story. Like I said, she totally made me feel that I am reading about Bella Swan or Anastasia Steele throughout, which Aqua would not put herself through in reality. Really. Yes, sure, she and Vanitas grew up together when they were younger and before Terra came in and all that sweet stuff later on. To be honest, I don't actually think she would comply to many things like falling back with him and making all the same decisions, especially when she is strong and independent canonically. Of course, she didn't, she wouldn't be able to be paired with Vanitas in this story, and that was what really irked me a lot. Instead of being herself, she became Anastasia just to fit into the mold that he desired about her, and hence even begging for him and letting him command her and just, really? She can't even dig her nails into his back during Chapter 3? Aqua would submit to Vanitas just like that? No. The Aqua that a lot of us fans knew, including my friend that read this story too, knew her as the one who would beat the crap out of Vanitas and stay strong for her friends instead of this version that no one bothered to address on. He also felt the same way I did with the characterization of Aqua in this story. And the longing for a man that may lead to abusing her in the future due to her submissiveness instead of being the strong girl that we knew? Ok then.
Well, other than that, the writing was pretty good overall, but like I said before, if only Aqua was not as OOC in here, my friend and I would've actually enjoyed it more if her name was of that girl I mentioned several times. I know you wouldn't be writing any more lemons, but please, bear the characterizations of Aqua in mind. Thank you for your time.
| Casmut chapter 4 . 1/14/2014
Oh...my...Gawd. This is the most sexiest, awesome, amazing, EVERYTHING piece of Vanaqua fanfiction I have ever had the pleasure to read. The extreme pleasure. o_o I can't believe you might not do lemons anymore, because this was just...just...my Gawd! I need MOAR! *O*
| I am Shibuya's Composer chapter 3 . 1/8/2014
Reading this while listening to Lay it down by Aerosmith is just way too perfect
| oblivionkeeper23 chapter 4 . 6/27/2013
Are you gonna continue this?! Cuz it's so good!
| Sprinkles chapter 4 . 4/30/2013
No thank you for this story, thank you so much
This story/lemon has to be one on the best Aqua x Vantias stories, like seriously.
I LOVED the lemon
Would be possible if you could do a Roxas x Xion lemon, you have a serious gift for making great lemonade.
LoL anyway I look forward to reading more of your 'M' rated fics. C :
| Le Neko-neko chapter 4 . 3/14/2013
Coy Aqua FTW! :3
| pgould16yahoo.c chapter 4 . 1/29/2013
om nice this is an interesting lemon but here'smy only coment ven you moron (face palm)
| BlackWingsXIII chapter 2 . 12/20/2012
this is very amazing . . I read it couple of times lately
Vanitas is so hot ! good writing :)
| bunnies chapter 4 . 4/1/2012
I freaking loved this whole story it was soooooo awesome just like how rainbow sprinkles are awesome I thought it so sweet how Vantias let Aqua listen to his ipod so she could sleep better You a deserve a truck load of reviews for brilliant lemon.
| anon chapter 4 . 1/5/2012
Rofl love it, funny ending through