Reviews for An Untold Region
aylengm chapter 1 . 1/16
More!
Clair Aragon chapter 1 . 8/29/2012
Too much talking. I can't even tell who talking. When finally did describe it was its own paragraph. You can put talking and paragraphs togther.
Amara-nii chan chapter 1 . 8/10/2011
i like the story i can't wait 4 more

keep up the good work
An Unknown girl from Johto chapter 1 . 7/4/2011
Good start, but you fail! First off, your biggest weakness is DETAIL. A lot of detail is missing, so I don't really know what's going on. Second, TOO MUCH DIALOG! We could really get more descriptions about the characters. Third, AL DOES NOT HAVE GOLDEN EYES! Only Ed does! BUT, the chapter is still good! This would be a good Al team: Skitty, Glameow, Espeon, Mienshao, Persian, and Liepard. Also, HE is Edward Elric isn't it? :3
SAOKirito chapter 1 . 7/3/2011
This is a very interesting story. The idea of adding a brand new region isn't very popular as a fanfiction idea so you don't find it lying around very often.

One thing I found add was that you had put plenty of dialog which is good and bad. We don't wont to see " " these things for ever paragraph! Maybe some more moving and action would be good. I saw a little but of that but not much, the dialog took over the chapter complete!

Well other than that slight problem it was a good and enjoyable chapter. I'll being awaiting the next chapter!

-TheRavenFlash!