|Reviews for June And The Autobots|
| Nosaki 'Halfbreed' Shulon chapter 5 . 9/27/2012
I must say that chapter 5 has to be my favorite chapter so far. Wonderfully written, and so far in this whole fic, all characters are talking just as one would expect. I think you've written Ratchets words out rather well, caught his character in the right light of things. I do look forward to more!
| cavtrooper chapter 5 . 9/11/2012
Fabulous story! I'd like to see you take it further!
| BlueSharpie1989 chapter 4 . 4/9/2012
I love your story so far.
| Grumpy Old Snake chapter 5 . 3/6/2012
These are wonderful. I sincerely hope you plan to continue them as more episodes come out.
| Grumpy Old Snake chapter 1 . 3/6/2012
"I'm a scientist, not a babysitter!" You have made me one very happy nerd, indeed you have. :D
This looks promising; onwards I go! Can't promise a review every chapter, but I'll certainly leave one at the end. Or for any other shout-outs or simply great comments you have that I feel need applauded. _
| Vampire Tails chapter 2 . 11/8/2011
Hey-ey! I knew I'd find this story again! P
...Perhaps I need to elaborate on that...
I saw this on DeviantART, but I couldn't review there because I don't have an account there, so I began looking for it here, and whaddya know? I found it!
This is a very, very good and descriptive story! However, I found some mistakes. /
Quotation marks should be used when you are saying something is somewhat or rather so-called: She tried to talk to her "guardian" instead of she tried to talk to her 'guardian'.
Semi-colons are not to be used after direct address, to start off a participial phrase, or to be used after a starting adverb or any other word of that kind. Like you have here, "Besides; ... ..." That's not correct. Rather, it's "Besides, ... ..." and for "Ratchet; ... ..." replace that with "Ratchet, ... ..."
There's also another mistake, one that I don't really remember... Ah, yes! It's about your punctuation in dialogue. It doesn't matter the length of the interrupting sentence, but if the first piece of the dialogue is cut off in the middle (of the sentence), the end of the interrupting sentence should be punctuated by a comma and the first letter of the second dialogue piece should be lowercased. Like so:
"But, Meta Knight," June began, "what about all of humanity? Didn't you care?"
His golden glowing orbs snapped toward her, as if a chord had been struck, and he retorted, "Of course I do!" he then glanced at the reports, and sighed, his voice falling back into his soft, gentle tone, "Do you not trust me, Mrs. Darby? I have been doing this for a long time now, and I need no one to instruct me on how to do my duty," he then turned back to the screen.
"Heh heh..." Miko giggled, a hand on her lips to try to conceal her laughter, but to no avail, so she revealed her reason, "he said 'duty'."
Meta Knight twitched in annoyance then.
-Heh heh... just a little something something I thought up just now. 3 No stealy! I think I may use this one day! XD
Well, that's it so far! Ta ta until next time!
| Berylium chapter 5 . 10/31/2011
Very nicely done! I really enjoyed how you put in additional behind the scenes detail. I hope you continue!
| Lady Katana4544 chapter 5 . 10/8/2011
This story has definitely caught my attention, the way you are exploring the relationships between June and the other characters is definitely interesting. :) I hope that you are able to update this is intriguing story soon.
| Kaleia chapter 5 . 10/4/2011
Good job! I can see both Ratchet and June are so alike indeed! I've seen half the new episode. What June said was upsetting and didn't see the true situation but I want to tell people don't they start even to dislike or hate on June! She is still cool but she is sorry truly. But I nearly have a heat attack when June got flew off from the hood car but glad she is ok! (but Miko should be the one to be flown off from the car hood! So annyoing she still is! Ugh!)... People who starts to dislike June is a lame excuse ever! Can't blame her forbeing a mom and all (moms are mostly are like that)
I'm a big June fan so she is still awesome! Love ya June! Can't wait to see more chapters!
| ImmatureChild chapter 5 . 10/2/2011
Dang! That was one deep philosophical discussion... Love how you can just see them starting to connect. INTENSE! XD But awesome none the less.
| Felinafullstop chapter 5 . 10/2/2011
Oh I am loving these ...these are so wonderful and great insight into Ratchet's mind. I love that you're using June to explore how Ratchet reacts to humans, and also how June thinks about the robots. She and Ratchet are very well paired in this in both mind and conviction. I love this ..how she twists her sweater hem, that's just great love little details like that...keep writing can't wait for more.
| Foxbear chapter 4 . 9/22/2011
I enjoyed this chapter a lot. Your ability to capture the details of the episode is amazing. I had to actually go back and re-watch a few scenes to see after I read the story. Keep up the good work.
| Pequod chapter 4 . 9/16/2011
YOU ARE A PLAGIARIST!
Excuse me, but is your story about literally copying scenes from the episodes and writing them so that they are lame? I don’t know if you have heard a little word called plagiarism, and there’s also another one you may want to consider: originality.
You warned there was a spoiler for episode 23 in your update, but that’s not a spoiler but a completely plagiarized sequence. Admit what you did or you may get in deep trouble. This place is for original stories; no matter if they are as bad as yours, but at least they should have an original plot and not just be the rewrite of scenes or complete sequences from the canon episodes.
And before you say 'but those episodes/scenes are really important to my story', here's a little tip. It is very, VERY easy to make reference to certain elements of the TV show without copying them completely. It's fine to borrow one or two lines, throw them into a memory sequence or dream, for example, but what you've done...is CHEAT.
Shame on you.
And before I let you go, let me make one more point. Do you not realise that episode 23 hasn't been shown anywhere but in Canada? Think of how many fans would have seen the spoiler alert, thinking that it would only hint at what the episode shows? That circumstance, i.e. a true 'spoiler', would have been acceptable. Instead what you've done is tell them EXACTLY how the episode pans out...I'm betting Hasbro wouldn't appreciate that.
| Neelh-v1 chapter 4 . 8/27/2011
This is a cute chapter.
| Kaleia chapter 4 . 8/25/2011
I saw that episode and I wanted to cry! I was like "Oh God No! Raph!" I had tears in my that Megatron! I wanted to kick him and punch him bad! How dare he!
But I love June's so glad she came in that episode and start working to help Raph.I cant believe theres dark energon in him and energon is the one to help survived to!
Good job though.