|Reviews for The Order of the Phoenix Kidnaps Annabeth Chase|
| Guest chapter 3 . 5/20
Very good story, shit spelling and Grammer
| HgSpartan chapter 1 . 5/11
Annabeth is really OOC...
| Guest Person chapter 2 . 4/26
Great story, I love your plot, its really good so far, just, i noticed you said there was a 7 on the shirt? Athena Cabin is 6. But thats just one small mistake, your story is really good, I'm enjoying it so far.
| Alexa chapter 6 . 3/15
There are a lot of spelling errors in this story. Normally a few spelling errors does not bother me that much but it is really detracting from the story.
| bao-earthdragon chapter 22 . 2/3
Damn it! Get the fucking names right! This really isn't funny anymore. Please proof read the chapters before you're uploading them.
Oh man... Was there even a point to half of this chapter? And why please is Fudge still alive... I hope that you will charge him with a few things and let him being thrown into Askaban...
| bao-earthdragon chapter 21 . 2/3
Seriously... Are you even a bit aware of the HP-verse? As good as every second name of the Death-Eaters was wrong
Really now? Were is Heras damn rage... that was not even a fraction of what you indirectly promised.
This chapter is ... unadequate. Sorry, but it doesn't measure up to what you implied earlier.
| bao-earthdragon chapter 20 . 2/3
Your putting him with Piper is actually logical. After all he is supposed to have a big heart and the capability to love unconditionally even with all that happened to him. Personaly I am way more miffed with over emotional, sorry the colourful speaking here, "emo-bitching" from him. Yes there are a few things that are going wrong in his live and maybe the way Hera has acted is incorrect, but seriously... Harry feels in this fiction in some points like all he wants to do is to cry.
His canon self is bad enough during his fifth year and on the high of puberty. Don't turn him into someone the intelligent and more adult reader only can loath, because he is way to unrealistic and over emotional.
Aside from that... The fiction and its background idea are nice... but seriously... Hera is a damn big bitch, Zeus as hypocritical as ever, Artemis an arrogant child that is throwing an tamper tantrum and Ares way to stupid to be real. I could go on, but I don't think one will find anybody who disagrees... Also I'm a bit miffed sometimes about their characterization in the canonical books by the author. It often doesn't do the real mythological stories justice.
This has nothing to do with you so, but you are using their canon selfs sometimes in a slightly disturbing manner.
I can't say if you got something wrong with the books or the story or if you have forgotten something, because I only read the first series and even then only one time, but that really does not matter here because it is automatically not canon anymore, as soon as you're creating a cross-over. Also it wouldn't be very logical for a fanfiction to follow canon... then there really wouldn't be any point to write it after all
| bao-earthdragon chapter 16 . 2/3
Ähm... Ignotus Peverell lived during the 13th century. He would be his many times grandfather, not one who is only 4 or 5 generations back.
And please get a Beta-Reader. It is sometimes a bit hard to understand what you want to tell us. Not only do make spelling mistakes, but your grammar and the building of yoursentences is not to good either.
You have good ideas and can bring them out. Your scenic description is very believable and I can picture the situations nicely in my head.
The fight against The Werewolf king for example was written brilliantly. Same with the situation with Midas ;)
That means that you are a good writer :)
So please make sure, that the people can enjoy it too
| bao-earthdragon chapter 9 . 1/30
Please get a Beta-Reader. While your writing skills are okay, you're making many mistakes in spelling and grammar. As I want to enjoy your stories with maximum fun, it would be better if someone else would look over them, after you have written a new chapter or maybe after you completed a whole story :)
| Guest chapter 6 . 1/22
That's just bullshit and being a pussy harry doesn't garner readers
| Annabeth chapter 5 . 12/29/2014
Your toefl score must be very low. your english' deathly terrible.
| Guest chapter 3 . 12/28/2014
Can you PLEASE proofread before you post, or at least get a beta? It's a good story, but all the spelling mistakes brings it down a level.
| Guest 31415 chapter 5 . 12/20/2014
I don't want to be very rude, but I just have to say/type/whatever, that I hope English isn't your first language or that this is translated into English because the writing is so terrible that I want to get a knife and savage my eyes. Although, it's a shame really, I like the plot and ideas but the rest is so horrible I either have rewrite the words or some phrases, in some cases your writing doesn't even make any sense! You really, really need to get a Beta writer to check your spelling and grammar.
| WEast chapter 5 . 12/17/2014
Whoop, there it is. No wonder Zeus isn't happy.
| Prongs chapter 1 . 12/7/2014
This is probably my 10th time reading this book. I've never read a better demigod Harry book.