Reviews for Princes Don't Cry Over Thieves
Doubleplusgoodduckspeaker chapter 1 . 7/27/2011
This was great! Good for you! :DD

I was pulled into this story right from the start, the idea of his mind being the last free piece of him was really nicely done, and the whole dual-narrative thing was really cool, too.

Props for having like actual romance in your story; through the entire first half I had this silly grin on my face, and then when it got a bit more serious you managed to keep to the spirit of the story, it all seemed appropriate and purposeful.

As far as concrit goes a few things stuck out to me as phrases that usually don't work in nearly any situation:

"more softly than was his wont."

"trail of wetly glistening rubies that fell from the cuts on his face."

'wont' is kind-of an awkward, too formal word, and it makes the entire sentence a little awkward. The whole bloodrubies thing just doesn't really work for me, it comes across as too 'trying too hard poetic' to me, sort of like the whole orbs eyes thing, yeah? It cheapens the story, because I thought this was really good, and I liked reading this! Honest, it was fun, entertaining, and probably my favorite of yours so far this contest! Great job!
My Misguided Fairytale chapter 1 . 7/26/2011
You really should be proud of this, it's awesome! It's so obvious you've put a lot of effort into this, and that came through in the writing. The story is very well put together, you've got some great lines (I love how you refer to TKB as having "limestone-white hair," etc) and the Casteshipping is great. I really like the setting of this story, too - you handle his ascension to Pharaoh well with his emotions, etc; he grows out of his immaturity and watching characters grow and evolve over the course of a story is always a wonderful thing. Good job on this, and keep up the good work! D

~Jess (MMF)
Saku Hyuuga Ishtar chapter 1 . 7/23/2011
Sorry, in advance, if my words doesn't make any sense.

I was intrigued by the title and how wonderful it was that the story was such as good as the title. I need to congratulate you, because I really liked everything, though I'm not a big fan of the pairing. The last line made me love this, best of lucks!
firstForward chapter 1 . 7/21/2011
This story just proves to me how much you've improved in this contest, honestly. Not in the word length, really, but in the character interaction, the description, the dialogue! I really liked your word choice: that the festival was a marker of Atem's utter confinement, Bakura's limestone-white hair, the amphora (I honestly improved my vocabulary from reading your story, I had no idea what an amphora was before.) I loved the line when Atem sulked and said "I'm the Prince of Egypt. I don't take orders from you." It had me highly amused. And of course, the ending. Perfect ending, the last line just tied everything up and left me with a satisfied feeling. Thanks for the read.
BedMonster666 chapter 1 . 7/20/2011
I loved it! Great stroy!
Coolaloo chapter 1 . 7/20/2011
Thank you so much for the casteshipping one-shot! :D I love it! x3 Thanks.