|Reviews for The Five Major Kisses of Lily Evans Potter|
| Noxova chapter 1 . 11/7
This was really bad. Terrible grammar, no structure, no point? Totally out of character. You have potential but it needs a lot of work.
| Guest chapter 1 . 3/1
Short and sweet :)
| sara chapter 1 . 2/7/2014
OMG i loved it perfect;-)! Keep it up
| p chapter 1 . 9/1/2013
| Jennifer Boyle chapter 1 . 6/18/2013
I really liked it ! It is nice, and seems very passionate! but you created that.. didn't you? :)
| Lmb111514 chapter 1 . 1/22/2013
Awww! This was great, I loved it.:)
| aisha chapter 1 . 12/19/2012
i really loved this little story it made me lol a lot
| aisha chapter 1 . 12/19/2012
woah i do love harry potter but i have not got to this book yet and i like ur little story
| Fulgance chapter 1 . 3/16/2012
Found a link to this on the forums, and figured hey, why not? I like Lily/James.
I -love- Lily/James.
Overall thoughts: This was short but not too short. I have a sweet spot for Sirius' "whether she says no or no" and for Lily "suddenly breaking tradition." You don't have much description here, but enough to make us see what the characters are feeling. Breaking it down:
- Story: possibly not the most original idea ever, but played out beautifully.
- Characterisation: There isn't much to say, since this is so short, but for example, Sirius only gets a short moment but is spot-on. Can you tell I like Sirius?
- Spelling: Nothing to say.
- Format: probably the only drawback to this OS: lack of linebreaks between, for example, the first and second kisses. Unless it's just my computer playing up again.
Kind of surprised this only has 7 reviews.
| Don't Let the Magic Die chapter 1 . 10/19/2011
The first one *sigh*
OHMYBLOODYFREAKINGGOSH! The first one made my heart skip it was so freakingly amazingly thrillngly James! I just completely adored it! And then when she just randomlyy called him 'hot'? *has spaz attack* TOO EPICALLY CUTE!
And then where Sirius says ask her to marry you and whether she says no or no kiss her? I SQUEALED WITHDELIGHT AT IT! And then he freaking DID IT! I love James Potter so much :)
Oky, we come dwn to the final proposal where she said yes: I. DIED. The end.
It was just TOOOOOOOOOOOO good!
I cannot praise this story enough it was just perfect and EXACTLY What I needed just now so thank you more than anything words could possibly express for sharing this with us! I'll love d cherish this story FOREVER!
| KeepCalmAndWriteSomething chapter 1 . 7/29/2011
Hello! Thanks for entering the competition! I wish you the best of luck!
Haha. No or no. Cute! I liked this piece, but it would have been nice if it had been more in depth.
Keep writing! :)
| chipzixo chapter 1 . 7/28/2011
Haha, Sirius 3 "Whether she says no, or no."
Very nice ideas in this, lovely and fluffy :) However, the sections are quite short and speech-filled (is that a word? lol, it is now), and I think a little more description etc. would have been nice. Characterization is in, from what's there, and I can't see any spelling/grammar mistakes. Although I have to admit, I did get a little confused with the change in tense x)
Overall, I liked this story. It was nice :)
Well done, and good luck in the competition!
| DracoHermioneForever chapter 1 . 7/21/2011
FOOODDDDDDDDDDD! Haha! I love this. Super cute :)
| Duilin chapter 1 . 7/21/2011
Muahahaha... I love when Lily lets 'hot' slip out.
| NeverBeenDarkMarked chapter 1 . 7/21/2011
Aww, how sweet! I love the one where he asks her to marry him at school and Sirius is like "kiss her, whether she says no or no" Very funny! And I love how he doesn't know her middle name :)