|Reviews for The Pit Stop|
| Reader101w chapter 1 . 8/28/2011
Very nice and touching story,
I really liked how you played through Ron's emotions and the things that worked around him and Kim, while their real friends still stuck around and had their backs.
Keep up the very good writing that you do,
| Mitchkpfan chapter 1 . 8/9/2011
That was rather moving, even with advance knowledge of Ron's success.
Ron's plight was very timely and you were likely influenced by personal experience with this. I'm glad that it sounds like things have settled for you.
I keep wondering what happened at the board meeting after Ron left. Was Miss Hutchins already considering Ron's proposal? Did any of the other board members see it as Ron trying to cash in on Kim's fame or were they reminded that Kim and Ron never took advantage of their fame?
Well, I guess there was the unfinished movie ("And the Mole Rat Will be CGI"), but I'm not sure if they were even paid in that case.
I was surprised about Wade being a doctor, but after graduating college in less than a year, getting a pHd would be relatively easy. I am surprised about Ned saying at Bueno Nacho all these years. Of course, some people stay at minimum wage jobs longer than they intend to. However, Ned pretty much lived for Bueno Nacho...until now.
Thanks for the look at Kim and Ron's children when they were younger. You do a good job making their family life believable.
Good luck and take care.
| Shrike176 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Once again, great story.
I agree that Ron did everything right after being laid off, and it can get pretty discouraging to know you did everything right and still got no results. As always, you showed how much it helps to have someone by your side in this situation. I found Kim's support for Ron very moving.
After another day of checking the news to find things are getting even worse, it was nice to read a pick me up story like this.
| daccu65 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Nice to see you back in action...and in your Fast Track story line as well. Yes, being under or un employed isn't much fun and it's good to hear that you overcame it. Sometimes fanfiction is one of the best places to go to vent about it.
Good luck in the future.
| GhostWriter267 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Excellent story. I love your Fast Track universe. Ron's never going to completely get over his insecurities, is he?
| Slipgate chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
You know, when I read 'Guy Against Grub' I noticed this little detail tucked in there - that Ron was 'let go from his last cooking job' (yes, I did just look up the exact wording).
I figured there was probably a story there that Ron maybe didn't want to revisit in detail - either because he was really upset with the place but didn't want to air that on TV or because he actually thought the people there were cool and didn't want to sling mud at a business. I did remember thinking it awesome that talking to his dad and his wife (Mr. Stoppable and Kim respectively) got the ball rolling on him starting a business. Since that's not exactly an instantaneous action, I liked the supportiveness it reflected since I didn't necessarily know where Kim was in her life at that moment - whether she was a student or able to pull in an income that would have them be covered while he tried to get the business rolling.
Anyway, when I saw 'The Pit Stop' published today, first my reaction was 'YES!' since you were publishing again, and second I was like 'Oh, so it'll be this story about the situation back then.'
All right, to start with, I believe this is the first story you've written where Kim is actually pregnant. Well, she was pregnant in 'Nature Trail to Heck' but she was also off-screen. However, I see right away that you're setting this situation up to coincide with while Kim is pregnant meaning that financial uncertainty is actually in the cards at least until Dawn is born plus some maternity leave before Kim can return to having much income herself. And I am sorry to see Nana gone, but this was set up for given what Dawn had said in 'Reset.'
Watching Ron come in with his personal effects, I see that he's referenced what the job is. I actually wondered if he'd been working at Arthur's at the time or if he'd been in some job *after* Arthur's (or if maybe he didn't even ever go forward with working at Arthur's after finishing cooking school). Kind of unfortunate that Mr. Smarty sold Arthur's (or are you trying to suggest something by saying 'Mr. Smarty's people' sold it) considering how he seemed to like the chain he'd created and considering it was part of his grand plan to have Ron Stoppable be successful... it seems like dropping the ball on Ron himself to sell it unless he didn't make the choice personally and then was too late to reverse it. But oh well, I guess it has been ten years since Graduation, meaning it's been maybe 8 since Ron started working at Arthur's. *Update after reading later into story*: Ah, that's what happened.
I'm glad to see Kim is listening to Ron on the 'they're out to get me' note, and she has matured to realize that maybe this kind of treatment really isn't normal. The whole 'papers already prepared and security to escort out' thing is really adding insult to injury. I am kind of hoping the chain suffers in the short term because future head chef applicants legitimately wonder if they won't be treated like crap and if they aren't better off going elsewhere.
"Ron say back" is probably "Ron lay back."
I understand Ron's reservation given that it's his only job on his resume, but I think the years of service should count for something if the firing was only recent and if he'd been there (and successful) for years.
You know what... I'm looking at what Kim says to Ron here and I realize that she's telling him NOT to let his old insecurities - which he'd probably finally left behind 8 years ago - come back. Affirming for him that he didn't 'blow it' or 'fail' is very important so that he doesn't go back to feeling like he doesn't do things right (which is patently false). And I like that even seven months pregnant Kim pragmatically lists what the sensible things to do right now are.
As for the reference to Kim's job, you had me check in with 'Vengeance with a Capital Z.' I was worried you were going to have Kim reveal unfortunate news to Ron also, but no, thankfully, you're just setting a particular ball rolling there for later.
Betty director should be Betty Director.
You know, it's pretty ridiculous how many people treat Ron the way Marcus Mann did. I'm amazed Kim isn't about to explode on them the way she was when she found out about what Mann did.
Sharp lady, that Dr. Director. "Or is this not about him?" indeed.
You know, as I keep reading this, Ron really did jump over a big time period when he mentioned 'being let go' and then immediately looking into the Pit Stop Diner. In retrospect I can understand him not feeling it necessary to revisit this rough spot once he's past it.
What Kim overhears Ron say to his daughter is heart-breaking. I want to give you a slow clap for that line.
"jut like its always been" has typos :).
"asled" for "asked"
I'm really glad to see that Ron turned it around.
It's great to see you writing 'Fast Track' again. And I' definitely glad to hear you recently recovered from your own 'bout.' Hope to see more from you soon-ish!
| Eddy13 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Glad to see you're back in action, Waveform. This story was good and a nice addition to the "Fast Track" universe. However, I think you forgot to mention how long since Graduation this took place like you always do.
| Katsumara chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Oh wow. Awesome, awesome stuff here, waveform. It's good to see you, buddy! Glad we got a story out of ya. Hope everything's been good on your end?
| CajunBear73 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Nice backstory of how some parts of their lives came to be.
Yeah some folks can be such a pain to work for when they are trying to make your lives miserable.
But we know how Kim's and Ron's lives made out since then, too.
| Muzzlehatch chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
A nice, uplifting story. Thanks for writing it.
| Sentinel103 chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Good start on a tale WF and good to see you posting again. Seems like Ron was rail roaded and some of us know what that is like. Maybe a couple of lawyers might look into a defemation of charactor suit. Sometimes it's fun to turn the tables. And I do like to see Kim and Ron later in life and raising a family.
Larry (Sentinel 103)
| CMR Rosa chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
Great chapter, I love the plot of the story and I hope you make more storys.