Reviews for Better Together
Strawberry-Yaoi Fangurl chapter 1 . 8/7/2012
KAWAIII! And thank you for keeping them in character! Keep writing!
MajoringinFandoms chapter 1 . 3/1/2012
So dam adorable. (Or should I say... cute? ;)
Tsuki107 chapter 1 . 1/13/2012
This deserves a million "snuggles and stuff"!

Amazing story :)

Cheers,

Tsuki
OrgasmicYaoi chapter 1 . 11/1/2011
*squeals* they are so cute together :)
MyDirtyLittleSecret chapter 1 . 9/8/2011
You deserve snuggles and stuff for that one. It was cute and sweet. :D And I think you captured the essence of this couple perfectly. These two are difficult to write, so you get extra props for that. :D
MadScientistV chapter 1 . 8/21/2011
I read this today while I was at work (yes, i know i'm a bad girl) and I absolutely loved it! It really is adorable!
DumpsterCat69 chapter 1 . 8/14/2011
kawaiiiiiiiiii
x chapter 1 . 8/9/2011
Oh wow... it’s so sweet. I’ve been hoping for something like that final talk, you know from the Valentine chapter, and you delivered. Beautifully! Thank you!
221B-Holmes chapter 1 . 8/7/2011
Hiro-san is so cuuute! Nowaki and him are so good together!

I thought you caputured the two of them perfectly in this one shot! There was a good balance of comedy, seriousness (Nowaki's overreacting of course .), and steamy interaction. I enjoyed this very much and am looking forward to more of your works!
D.Gray-Man archive 'Stalker chapter 1 . 8/6/2011
I enjoyed reading this fic 3

I say; they are both in character, something I really liked in this story. Like what the previous reviewer 'Attempting Eyes' had written, some parts of the dialogue really need a comma in between.

Personally, I'm not that picky in reading the couple doing the actual deed. Let's say the smut is steamy enough to set the "mood"~

A fic so well done; how can I resist~? I'll be watching out for more Junjō Romantica fics from you~ Cheers :D

-Man archive 'Stalker'
Kirakrz chapter 1 . 8/5/2011
I really enjoyed your story! It showed how strong their love for each other was combined with lemons, haha! I wonder if you are gonna continue your story or is this just a one-shot?

Overall, great job! I always enjoy lovey-dovey between egoist couple!
Cerberus Revised chapter 1 . 8/5/2011
I thought this fic was delicious. One of the best M fics for this couple I have read in a while.

The way that it started of was wonderful exploring all the subtleties of their relationship, that delicate dance of intimacy. Intimacy can be way sexier than sex sometimes.

I liked also however, that it was very sexy without being over the top graphic. Let's the reader dwell in the lovely possibilities of imagination.

Great job with the dialogue seemed very believable and was just the right mix of humor/sweetness/ and sass. And I loved the ending.

I think Nowaki's comments about Hiroki being delicate and Hiroki's response diminishes the threat of Hiroki being made to seem effeminate (in response to a previous reviewers concerns.

Anyway, thank you for writing such a lovely fic.
Madame Masquerade 64 chapter 1 . 8/4/2011
I love how nowaki was scheming to get hiroki to notice him. So funny because that's probably actually how he thinks. Great job
Attempting Eyes chapter 1 . 8/3/2011
Here I am again :)

I can already tell that your writing has improved from "Glimpses" so good job on that!

They are both very in character in this story, kudos!

Try to include a few commas to separate different thoughts. For example change "I said no you horny bastard!" to "I said no, you horny bastard!" But beware - too many commas can be just as bad. (I know this from my own writing :-O )

Just a personal preference (And please feel free to dismiss this as me being picky), italicizing one's inner thoughts helps the reader also.

Also, Hiroki is a little effeminated in this story, physically and all. Describing him as delicate is certainly fine, just try not to overdue it.

The ending is very cute! Mixing fluff with their constant bickering - perfect combination!

So I hoped this critique has helped. You are a very talented JR writer.

Btw, my own account is Torby Tiptoe. I just was too lazy to log in. Feel free to check out my stories and review (Sorry if I seem to be advertising on my review n_n)

It's just that you seem very skilled and I could use some prompts or inspiration. I haven't been able to write for a couple months and I'd appreciate anything you have to say!

Thanks! And once again, fabulous overall. I hope this review was helpful. :)
Retainit chapter 1 . 8/3/2011
AAwe! I love that pairing! and you portrayed their relationship really well. Nowaki's innocence is soo cute.

Maybe you can write one where Hiroki tops? It would kind of compliment what they were talking about in the end. But it can also end like that :3

Good Job on this short story. I enjoyed reading it.
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