|Reviews for Tortured Soul|
| NeonStar89 chapter 3 . 11/13/2011
Ohhh! Loving it! Can't wait to see how it all turns out!
| re chapter 3 . 11/12/2011
| kpyn3 chapter 1 . 11/11/2011
Great first chapter, the story will be very entretaining.
| Writer of Angelus chapter 2 . 10/7/2011
for the love of god, update the story! you cant leave us in suspense for long!
| Jack1157 chapter 2 . 9/24/2011
I would lose sleep if this story went unfinshed, update soon.
| NiceNipps chapter 2 . 9/11/2011
This is dark for my taste but I found myself drawn to it and enjoying it. I am hoping some light will some to it soon. ;)
| Dr. Blue22 chapter 2 . 9/8/2011
Hey Gue great work here! And glad you had Gohan working on some baseball with Yamcha!
| ZeoUnit chapter 2 . 9/8/2011
The story it self is doing really good and things go in nice flow.
It's nice how you shown Videl here and the level of details in the story is good. That last part with Videl was pure Gold. XD
There is nothing to much to comment on the chapter other then that is good as the first one witch is good by it self, chapter 1 was real jewel.
I hope that you will upload new chapter soon because story is good and itwould be a shame to be left unfinished. (no uploads for sometime now so... XD)
In any cease good luck with the new chapter and best wishes from ZeoUnit
| Gamarabi chapter 2 . 9/4/2011
This chapter was awesome...I don't know who is writing the next one but please write it soon!
| sheenasalam chapter 2 . 9/3/2011
one word "SHIT" looks like Gohan might be in to some trouble again how are you going to get him out of this next mess. Update soon
| Cody545 chapter 2 . 9/3/2011
Wow you have something many authors don't : great discription. I can't wait for the next chapter. I also see y it takes you a good amount of time to finish a chapter ( just a great length of chapter). two thumbs up :-)
| Son Goshen chapter 2 . 9/3/2011
gue22, you just gave me a gigantic urge to kill Videl. She's acting so infuriating, and the government wants to kill the guy who saved the world. Honestly, what the heck got into their minds? Great chapter, I await the next.
| r chapter 2 . 9/3/2011
a lot better than first chapter...
keep it up...
| ZeoUnit chapter 1 . 9/1/2011
The story looks really interesting the way story is starting it self is nicely made. Must admit there some stuff that kinda are not in favor on her plan... I mean... He can survive a lot more dangerus stuff then poison, knife and certainly not bullets. XD
The Videl in this story look very interesting and kinda... can't say dark but aomething on that line and it looks good from some point of view .
The Gohan in this story looks just like the Gohan shiuld be with Chichi as his mother, good and honest and more then with few friends of his age so good job there.
The chapter so far looks pretty good and the concept of the story looks awesome the only thing that is kinda sad is that it looks like the story will not have happy ending, the story is mark as adventure & angst and what can i say i like to see them together at the end but it looks like that will not happend here, other then that everything looks good.
Hope to see new chapter really soon so good luck and good writting from ZeoUnit
| ion chapter 1 . 8/23/2011
I think you've got a great beginning here. I particularly love how you showed Gohan having grown up just as ChiChi wanted-and it wasn't exactly as she wanted, she realizes, when he's been so repressed and obedient and goal-oriented that his life's a bit hollow without him even understanding it. But still Gohan, who isn't afraid to do the right thing, and I love his maturity and how he's decided to use his powers against the people making weapons with his uranium rather than having turned into a wimpy human who would've tried to wade through paperwork and get the police to handle it. He's also not so over-the-top good-natured that it seems ridiculous that a government could be worried about what a very intelligent young man with extraordinary abilities and strength could do. Granted, I'm not sure how legally government-sanctioned Videl's kill order for the Delivery Boy is, but it makes sense.
Love the hints at how Videl grew into the woman you've shown us. Really, she was just too cocky and jumped into situations Saiyaman had to save her from in canon, but without him there she would've eventually had to learn a harsh lesson and that definitely would've changed her. Wicked description of her interrogation of Yamcha, and I really liked that you didn't make him a wimp, because he is one of the most powerful humans on the planet and of course he wouldn't be as scared as Videl might've wanted. Not a big fan of Yamcha, either, but I think it fit his personality for the innuendos and remarks that annoyed Videl so much. The drug makes a lot of sense against him, but I wonder if half-human biology would be as susceptible, or if Gohan would notice Yamcha had been drugged and would be on the lookout for it. Despite what she's doing, I liked the glimpse into Videl's righteousness when she approved of Yamcha and the others who were willing to go to the Cell Games and fight for the world-even if she doesn't seem to know who beat Cell. And was she just prepared to drug Yamcha as a hostage, or does she suspect the 'light tricks' and super strength were real when the Delivery Boy shows up?
Great beginning, very interesting premise, and real and flawed characters in Videl and Gohan. I look forward to seeing them interacting next chapter! Please update soon!