|Reviews for System Error: Self Evolving Program|
| Fimbu1vetr chapter 17 . 9/3/2014
Hahah nice the key coffee
| Fimbu1vetr chapter 15 . 9/3/2014
Pretty good original fic )
| Fimbu1vetr chapter 4 . 9/3/2014
Poor NPC lol
| Fimbu1vetr chapter 2 . 9/3/2014
| Guest chapter 17 . 7/24/2014
I really don't know what to say. The concept of this story is quite interesting. I had an idea like this once, but I'm a bad writer so I forgot. But I'm confused at the Player characters. They correspond to characters unmentioned in the canon, but don't seem to act accordingly. Also, I wish I owned a coffee brewer. I like french vanilla coffee.
| FalseMask chapter 17 . 7/23/2014
Yeah, no. I call bullshit. You can't just decide automatically that every single person who doesn't like coffee is an NPC; different people have different tastes. Even if all NPCs dislike the coffee, that doesn't mean that EVERYONE who doesn't like it is an NPC.
| Sekai -The World chapter 17 . 7/21/2014
Damn it, I was too preoccupied imagining Noriko breaking down when she knew she was actually a NPC (since the start of suggesting the survey) to the point that I never thought of the 'HOW'. Yes, Key Coffee did flash through my mind, "Why is it Key Coffee again? Guess some people like it some people don't..."
Guess I have to wait till next chapter to see the Breakdown of Noriko (well...I don't think she would considering how fast she recovered from last chapter but one can imagine). No offense to Noriko but I absolutely love your cliffhanging breakdowns. (Never turned severe but ever since your Empress Breakdown, I totally fall in love with you, and your imaginary breakdown moments XD)
Until next time! Hope to read the next chapter soon! [Oh and now that I think about it, I congrats you for making the right choice to skip the 'Becoming Empress' phase, I don't think I can handle waiting that long of a cliffhanger)
| SuperEpicPandas chapter 16 . 6/5/2014
Despite having the flaws you told us already, having you writing style become worse is like saying your fingerprints changed. You are an amazing writer, and this story gives me a "Lord-Of-The-Flies" feeling, except for a few areas.
| SuperEpicPandas chapter 2 . 6/2/2014
I just remembered something while reading this! The main character of this fanfic has the same last name as Hisaye Yamamoto, a famous Japanese-American writer and poet during WW2 era! Is that where you got the name inspiration from?
| tomaO2 chapter 16 . 5/14/2014
Well, I'm still around from a year ago. This is an interesting story. I think there is a lot of ground to be made by using a cast of OCs in this setting. I like the setup of one npc rising above things and then going power mad.
I think this chapter is missing something though. By having Nanata reveal the impending doom and telling students they must pass on, why isn't the question of who is a past lifer not coming up? It's rather critical. NPC girl is probably too shell shocked to ask how this rebellion managed to start due to the passive nature of NPCs but it sounds like the proclamation is including her as well.
We know who some of the past lifers are but I doubt we know all of them and knowing all of them is critical in being able to achieve the goal of everyone moving on because anyone that was missed, will be supposedly attacked. More then just trying to beat Tenchi, the Afterlife Battlefront also had a massive interest in identifying every past lifer that was in the school, which is NOT an easy task. Especially since past lifers can run out to the forest for and live in caves and whatnot for years on end. I've often wondered just how big this world is and what might happen if you just decided to keep marching away from the school. No one ever seemed to believe that they are trapped in an enclosed area.
I also think it's helpful for Noriko to talk about this because a large part of the reason why she became like she did is because she thought the NPCs were a bit subhuman, which they kinda are. Without past lifers around, her plan would have been a success. I doubt anyone would have dethroned her. I mean, even today, years after the A.B. disappeared the principal's office STILL has not been reclaimed. NPCs adapt to their situation and act accordingly.
| Sekai -The World chapter 16 . 4/29/2014
Feedback? Hmm, I actually as 'Appox' has mentioned, your story's good point is you don't have 'too' much characters. Like him I really favor this work over others because its easy to remember and follow Noriko. [Though at some point I forgotten about Eiji and reread to know who he was XD, Sry Eiji.]
Noriko was our favorite cute adventurer, then she was suddenly an Empress, now she is our shy traumatized little girl...then there's her mental victorious fist pump. Is our lovely explorer coming back?
Eiji is a magnificent bastard who is well-played and well-used. Keep using him wisely but not too much, preferable during timing when someone have to play the smart guy. There are others who are in need of character development before him for now.
Akiyama is a, Suzaku, I would call, if you watched CG you would understand. If not, anyway Akiyama is a 'potential' character who is in need of development. You might want to start on his development since Eiji is well, already a magnificent bastard. Akiyama seems like contrast of Eiji so you might be interested to try think that way.
Asako...you might want to deepen her relation with Akiyama and Noriko if there's spare time. Nanata's situation and development is definitely more important but personally I would want to see an interaction, one that is they be together to talk. Though again Nanata prioritize over everything since she's fairly new.
Well, personally...just write and go like how you have been doing! We are here because we like your writing and the story in the first place :)
| AppoX chapter 15 . 4/8/2014
Great chapter, Eiji best character I hope you continue with this, I usually hate OC characters but I somehow enjoyed the ones in this Fanfic. (I even usually stop reading fanfics that have too much OC characters, but in this fanfic those OC's are actually good)
PS I ship Eiji x Noriko
| Anonimossu chapter 15 . 4/6/2014
Please continue TT I'm dying curious here TT At least Asako and Noriko get back together huh? For some reason this fic looks like Death Note for me :p But its okay, I love Death Note and your fic so much! So please continue :D
| Sekai -The World chapter 15 . 4/4/2014
I actually expected a few more bizzare endings to this conflict, like after the Fujimoto surrendered and meet up with Noriko, Eiji and Akiyama, Noriko would be demanding to kill the angel and chaos ensues. Nevertheless it ended off heart-warmingly and I like it.
Good luck for next chapter! For sure I am reading it!
| anony chapter 15 . 4/4/2014
Yay update l! Of course there are ppl still reading. Looking forwarf to next update!