|Reviews for A Moment|
| Bodom's Nightmare chapter 1 . 6/30/2012
I really like how this pulls nicely off the actual book, right when Harry is caught in the restricted section. I love how Severus walked in on him as he was looking in th mirror, and when Harry saw him, he wasn't in a very sophisticated position, which made me laugh so hard.
I also noticed, if Severus had Obliviated Harry about Flamel, wouldn't that mean Harry wouldn't be able to stop Quirrel from getting the stone? I know this is a oneshot, but could you possible add another chapter? I would like to see what would happen to Harry without the knowledge of Flamel.
| slightlysmall chapter 1 . 6/29/2012
This is wonderfully written, well-woven into the narrative we already know, and so so true to character. There is one spelling or grammar error- "those too green eyes he had loved as a boy" should either be TWO green eyes, or, if you mean that they are excessively green, "too-green eyes" But really lovely prose. Favoriting.
| MissSadieKane chapter 1 . 6/29/2012
I think you had Snape's character spot on with this - he loved Lily, wants to keep Harry safe for her, but hates James and hates Harry for being like James - like when he sees that Harry's been using the invisibility cloak and when he gets worried Harry has been looking at dark magic. I like how Snape sees Harry and Lily in the mirror but Harry doesn't see him. And Snape doesn't see James and Harry's grandparents either. What I also liked about this story was that all the way through I thought it was in some alternative universe when Snape talks to Harry in the Philosophers' Stone, but then at the end he gets obliviated meaning that it is still the same as in the books.
| reminiscent-afterthought chapter 1 . 6/28/2012
You certainly put more detail into your work than Rowling does. I love the description of Filch’s grin. On that same paragraph though, I think you should have split the long sentence of dialogue up with that description. Ie. “…” he said with a grin. “…” – except properly of course.
And Moody as proven wrong, albeit three years early. :) I like how you’ve got Snape’s suspicious nature down pat.
I especially love the ending. Esp. that bit about darkness.
| YenGirl chapter 1 . 5/31/2012
Ah, such sweet, sweet angst! *rubs chest*
I don't think Severus would see Lily the same time as Harry, but I know why you wrote it like that.
I'm glad Severus was kind just that tiny bit kinder to Harry. It's the magic of those green eyes :)
| Jack Mason Potter chapter 1 . 12/14/2011
Very nice job, clever story work with keeping in very character appropriate and in canon
| SiriuslyHarryPotter chapter 1 . 10/4/2011
That was...wow... That was... Really really intense.
| lost in my design chapter 1 . 8/21/2011
Oh, that was intense. I kept thinking to myself, but that didn't happen, but you made it all fit together. Snape was characterized wonderfully. Well done :)
| blueisasome chapter 1 . 8/20/2011
I really liked this, but I have a small problem with the fact that Snape could look in the mirror at the same time as Harry. In the book it says that it only works for one person at a time, and is more canon to the movie than the book.
| The Dork Lord chapter 1 . 8/19/2011
I liked it! I kinda figured Snape would see Lily in the mirror but you put a nice twist in it. Good job!
| loveislouder94 chapter 1 . 8/18/2011
Snape was characterised well here, and you've created a very enjoyable piece to read. Nicely done! :)
| Lady of York chapter 1 . 8/18/2011
Beautiful. Simply beautiful. Loved it so much.
| Kchapman chapter 1 . 8/18/2011
This was really good! I liked how you made it fit the book instead of changing it like so many people have. Good job!
| Masks and Teapots chapter 1 . 8/18/2011
I usually have very little sympathy for Snape (always figured his love for Lily and the Marauders' bullying don't erase or excuse his treatment of Harry for six years), but here you went and made me almost like him... This is very nice way of showing him being, well, nice to Harry, in his own weird Severus-Snape-like way.
It's fairly obvious that Snape would see something Lily-related in the Mirror of Erised, but you still made the story original with the context.
So, on the whole, nicely done :)